new here

Post Reply New Topic

Hello! I've been having a hard time over the past few days because I believe I'm autistic and have been finding it difficult to talk about with people in my life. I'm 22 and have recently started working and (as the first time not being a student) am having immense difficulty figuring out how I'm supposed to make friends. I also have been finding professional behavior and dress codes very difficult. I don't mean to offend by self-diagnosing, but I currently have a therapist that doesn't seem to understand that I have learned how to act over time to connect with others, and that what I'm feeling isn't just social anxiety. I have very much felt like an alien my whole life, so I love the title of this website. I just wanted to introduce myself and am just hoping to connect with others like me and figure out how to live happily when it feels like I don't get how anything works. Thank you!

Welcome to WP! I hope you find it to be a good discovery.

I hope you've found these:
<=>- Autism-Spectrum Quotient Test (AQ)
<=>- Aspie Quiz ^{Registering is optional!}
They can't give you a diagnosis but they might confirm your suspicions. They might be more helpful than the therapist if the therapist doesn't specialize in Autism.

As far as making friends and such...yeah, a lot of us have had the same issues.

As for "professional behavior and dress codes"...I suspect you should be cautious and start out over-achieving. Try to be like your co-workers but err on the side of being too-well dressed and too-polite when dealing with others. Over time you should be able to break the code.

(For instance a long, long time ago I took a job where people wore two-piece suits—I made a good impression by wearing three-piece suits. When everyone else switched to just a shirt-and-tie I switched to two-piece suits. Etc.)

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome... hope you enjoy the site .....

Welcome to Wrong Planet.

You wrote: I also have been finding professional behavior and dress codes very difficult.

Early in my life, I had a problem with what I wore. This issue became more visible when I moved off and began living on my own. You see I am color blind. I see colors but they are just not the same colors that everyone else sees. If you think of an early color television that uses Red, Green, Blue to create all the colors of the rainbow. And you think of the human eye working the same way. My mind only picks up two of the colors and creates in its imagination the third color. As a result, I wore clothes that suited me, but when other people looked at me, THEY FAINTED.

If you have a similar problem, then find a normal person to select your clothing for you. I am sure that there are many that will help.

welcome! each of us is so different but we can share and interact and this group is great for that! Glad you are with us! One of the best things about learning of my autism was learning that there were others "out there" who actually understood. I was not alone! (neither are you, when you are here)

Welcome to WP!

To WearingMySweater:

Hello from a fellow New Yorker! Welcome to Wrong Planet!

According to the therapist who officially diagnosed me, adult autism self-diagnoses are about 80% likely to be correct.

Most of us in the adult autistic community have no problem with well-informed self-diagnosis. If you've read a lot of stuff by autistic adults and you identify with a lot of it, then it's highly likely that you are autistic, and even if it turns out that you technically aren't, you may find this forum helpful. But it's still good to get an official evaluation if you can.

If you would like, I can send you a private message containing a list of places where people in NYC metro-area support group have gotten adult autism diagnoses. (I've been meaning to update the relevant page on my website but have not yet gotten around to it.)