Hello! Navigating Big Life Changes

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Hey everyone,

I’m Tito, a 36-year-old from Santa Cruz - Bolivia, and I’ve recently started exploring the possibility that I might be on the autism spectrum, specifically Level 1 Autism (or Asperger’s). Lately, I’ve been reflecting a lot on how I process the world and how it affects my relationships, especially with my family and partner.

I’m getting engaged to my girlfriend in late November, and while it’s exciting, it’s also making me feel anxious. I’ve been thinking about how I’ll manage the expectations of marriage and raising a family, job security and how I can balance all of that with my own needs. Socializing isn’t always easy for me. Casual conversations can be tiring, and I need plenty of time alone to recharge. I’m hoping that a diagnosis could serve as a bridge to help me understand myself better and make it easier for others to understand me too. I have already visited this week a professional to start the evaluation process.

Hobbies I have obsessed over: Running, hiking, playing chess, brewing beer, sailing, baking sourdough bread, ashtanga, farming and ranching.

I’d love to connect with others here who have had similar experiences, especially those who’ve gone through a late diagnosis or are navigating relationships while exploring their own neurodivergence or relate to any of my hobbies. Looking forward to learning from your experiences and sharing mine.

Cheers,
Milton

Hi Tito,
Welcome to the good ship WP.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome to WP! I hope you frequent it.

And if you made it to 36 before you suspected Autism then, if you are Autistic, you are reasonably accomplished at coping.

What will be a challenge for you (with or without Autism) is MARRIAGE! It is an "interesting" experience.

And *CONGRATULATIONS!* on getting married! It will be an adventure for both of you...with or without Autism.

barbaroja, Welcome to Wrong Planet.

First off you have several unique traits that other people do not possess. So understand that you are different then many people but it is not all bad. You have some skills that may come in handy as the years go by. Learn to use your unique skills to overcome you difficulties.

One of the problems that several people on the site experience is called Burn Out. I believe there are two tools that can eliminate Burn Out. These are strenuous exercise and deep sleep (REM and deep NREM sleep).

You wrote that some of your hobbies are running, hiking, sailing, ashtanga, farming and ranching. All these skills will help you deal with Burn Out because they are forms of exercise.

So the other issue is sleep. Make sure that your bedroom is ideal for getting deep sleep each night. Control and minimize the light, sound, distractions, temperature and get good deep sleep each night in order to keep you mind at its peak.

Bienvenidos a Planeta Equivacado!