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I am new to this web site. My son has been diagnosed with Aspergers.
I think the most difficult thing is that everything is an argument.
It tires me out. What if just once he would say, "Okay"? What if we could
just once go shopping for shoes in less than three hours? What would my day be like
if I could change my mind about the day's schedule and not have to fight about it?
Well, that's my rant. I'm tired.

Your son sound familiar, I'm very picky with shoes and won't let an argument just end. It can't just end, their needs to be a resolution. Anyways, welcome to WP!

I am obsessive about my pants and shoes. When I finally kill a pair it can take me weeks or even months to find a replacement I like, so I try to always have at least three pairs of each in rotation. When I travel internationally (something I do fairly often, lately) I usually plan on spending at least one whole day (and more likely two or three) shopping.

welcome to WP, Antigone

hope you can find some helpful stuff on here.

Vivi
(as Mod)

Welcome to WrongPlanet.

In such arguments, I've come to learn to see things from my 'opponent's' point of view. It's helped me see where they're coming from.

See if you can try that with your son, as in see if you see things from his point of view, and see if you can convince him to see things from your point of view

GA

Welcome,

I am an Aspie and I have an Aspie son. Even with being an Aspie I am also very tired. I too wish sometimes it would just be OK but I try to understand what about the situation is so hard for him so I can try to understand his side and help him understand mine.

As I write this (at 9am in the morning) my son walks in and engages me in one of these situations. I too am tired.

Y

*hugs* I hope for your sake he at least wears the shoes! It would take me all day to buy a pair of shoes when I was a kid, and invariably I then refused to wear them!

He doesn't take as long to actually wear the shoes anymore. It just takes him a while to get the shoelaces soft enough so they lay down the way he likes.
I am learning a lot about why these things are important to him.
For the longest time before his diagnoses I looked at all these things as just what made him unique. No one else I knew took 20 minutes to tie their shoes. I do have more patience now since I know that he cannot help himself and he doesn't take 20 minutes just to be pokey.

*grins* I think for me that sort of thing has improved as I got older, but I used to HATE all forms of underwear. And the biggest problem with shoes (aside from having one foot slighty bigger which makes them feel different, a problem that STILL drives me dippy) is the need for both shoes to feel the same tightness. This is virtually impossible to do with laces... wait, how old is your son? If he isn't tying his own laces yet, teach him, so that way he can AT LEAST go through all the adjusting himself!

Welcome to wrongplanet where strange is not all that uncommon, in fact, its kinda normal here.
Make your self at home.

Lol, normal is strange here!