Discussion for >40?

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Hello All:

I suspect I've had Asperger's for years -- no, decades! -- but didn't recognize it for what it was. I'm functional, but now that I'm getting older, it's getting worse. Are there any other >40s who want to compare notes? Or clinicians who know about Asperger's in >40s? Love to talk to you.

Hi and welcome!

If you haven't already, you may wish to check out the "In-Depth Adult Life Discussion" forum.

Hey, gwenevyn, love your new avatar!

Thanks! I'd been thinking the same about yours!

Nice to meet you, Azure.

Welcome,

We do get old, same old same old.

Welcome to WrongPlanet!
Come to the Dino-Aspie Ex Cafe thread and meet other middle aged people who are the last generation
to be diagnosed officially or otherwise as adults in their late 30s, 40s, and 50s.

Trusting those over 40 topic

Welcome to WP, Azure. there is a forum for those over 40 but I suppose we could do with another. The more, the merrier.

We have lived a long time with our differences, and there was little if any connection. In my whole life I have only met one person officially diagnosed and she was only 20(a very nice young woman).

Not many are diagnosed as adults because we tend to be seen as bipolar, depressed, menopausal, etc. When I was a child I was thought to be schizoid (sounds sci-fi). One not-so-brilliant mental health professional thought I might be developmentally disabled, or afraid of men. What?? (He did not use the words "developmentally disabled".)

Only one woman came close. When I was 17 (I am now 53) she told my mother I had autistic tendencies, but that she could not dx me and any autistic children she had seen were different (perhaps somewhat less verbally communicative than I was).

I cannot even say I am a social person, though I am more non social than anti-social. Being social is not easy, unless it is in print. I am glad we can communicate this way.

after your first few decades, you learn to fake it more or less..
Been there, done that. The 'official'diagnosis` didn't come out until I was over 40. Just glad to know there's a name for what makes me not right.. now, how to deal with it.

Hi and welcome to the Aspie community

I was only diagnosed in July.07 and I'm in my 40s

Thanks, guys, for all your responses. Makes me feel I'm not such an outcast after all. The issue of direct eye contact is interesting to me, because I had it pretty chronically, then at a certain point I stopped being afraid or discomforted by eye contact. In fact, I really eye-balled people for probably a couple of years, and felt good about it, confident that I was able to. Now the aversion has kicked in again.

It's fairly subtle -- I realize I can't remember what people I've just been introduced to look like --- scarcely a clue! -- then if I really run back over it, I realize my gaze was sliding around the whole time. I never really focused on the person, not on the face and certainly not to make eye contact. I'm trying to force myself to become more aware in the moment.

That's a bit hard, because as soon as I'm confronted with people, a kind of quiet panic seizes me. I can smile and talk to them okay; I just can't look at them. And, although I'm lonely and really want to make friends, it's always such a great relief to get away.

This is driving me nuts!!

Anybody else experience it this way?

Love,

Azure