I'm the most introverted person I know IRL. Before I got a job after a year of being out of work, it was common for me to go days without seeing or talking to anyone....and I loved it. No expectations put on me to behave a certain way, no one's vibes interfering with my emotions and no worrying about my grooming, it was great.
But now, I'm back at work, even carpooling with a co-worker who's, thankfully, a free spirit outside the norm herself, accepts and even admires my peculiararities. My other co-workers are nice too, though it's still draining to suddenly be around people for 10 hours a day.
The girl I carpool with, who's into alternative ways of living (like me)and who's even spent some time living abroad, asked me if I wanted to go Salsa dancing with her this weekend. As much as I wanted to spend time with her, I knew being in a loud club trying to socialize with others for hours wouldn't be fun for me plus, with my dyspraxia, I can't dance to save my life. So I, regretfully, had to turn her down.
I just hope she didn't take it as me not wanting to be around her but a part of my makeup. She's also the only person, other than my mother, whom I told about my AS and she was very receptive and curious about it. My worry is our opposite temperments may get in the way and she'll think it's too much of a strain to acommodate my need for solitude.
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"There is difference and there is power. And who holds the power decides the meaning of the difference." --June Jordan