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I am a 30-year-old male. I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome two years ago. I really need someone to communicate with who actually understands, all too well, what this monster called Asperger's Syndrome really is. It has really been destroying me ever since my diagnosis. I have NEVER met ANYONE who is dealing with this. The inability to explain what I'm thinking and feeling has about driven me to give up. I don't know how to deal with this very well. It's like my worse fears have come true. I grew up always thinking, "these thought patterns will change as I get older", or "Surely there isn't something really wrong with me". I guess there really was something wrong with me. How do I come to grips with all of my fears coming true, on the inside? I don't know...Maybe I'm making too much of a big deal about it. After all, I sure appear quite normal. There couldn't possibly be anything wrong with me!

Hi aspie 28

I myself have AS have been diagnosed in 2004

I too am new to this site

Welcome to the Planet. I'm also a 30-year-old guy who's coming to grips with himself. I've known for most of my life that I'm somewhere on the spectrum, and it hasn't ever affected me as much as now. I feel like I'm leading two lives. In one life, I'm doing great: I'm living on my own, working in the field I've always wanted to work in. I have more friends than ever, and they're better than any I've ever had. But the flip side is, I've never felt more alone. I'm constantly thinking about how bad my work situation is. I'm not where I think I should be. I have almost no self-esteem anymore (not a plus when you're job-hunting), I'm physically and emotionally drained, I can't concentrate...and I don't want to bother my friends with it all because they have better things to do, I think. So I stew in my own juices and fester about things while I try to scratch my way out of the shoebox I'm in. Typical neurosis? Spectrum disorder? I don't know. But I hope my situation makes you feel a little less alone.

welcome to WP, aspie28. there are plenty of people here who will share experiences and answer questions for you.

Vivi
(as Mod)

It's like you know in your logical mind that there must be others in your same situation, but that all too familiar and over-powering other side tends to convince you that you are the only one.

Hi!

I apologize for the late welcome. I hope you come to a fair conclusion about AS soon. Please feel free to post any questions or comments you may have for us. A number of us are online throughout the day, and we will get back to you as soon as we can.