I just joined today!! ! I haven't been officially diagnosed, but it's quite obvious that I am indeed an "aspie".
I love military games, and I love strategy games. I used to play Battle for Middle Earth 2, until my computer was plagued with pop-ups so I can't play it easily anymore, and I got an Xbox 360. I made it up to rank 21 in the whole world as goblins, which are undoubtedly the hardest race to use. I suppose there aren't very many people who care about BFME 2 though, so I'll move on.
I also decided that I might as well learn some foreign languages. I took 4 years of German from 9th to 11th grade, (my school system is some screwed up block scheduling, so not only is that possible, but common,) until I got to south campus, where I didn't get along with the teacher so well. Now I'm in my senior year and I decided to take my chances with spanish. I am currently in my second year of spanish, (both of which I actually took this year) and my teacher tried to persuade me to switch into spanish 3, because I actually happen to be better at spanish than all of her spanish 3 students. Unfortunately I would have had to drop calculus to do that, so I'll just stick to 2 years of spanish for now. Oh, and besides german and spanish I took a course on ancient greek which taught at a rate that was approximately sixty times faster than the rate of teaching languages in a public school, which was refreshing. I am continuing to study and learn greek on my own.
Another constructive hobby I have is writing my own music. I have about 22 songs that I have written and 19 of them on an unofficial cd, which I am planning to reorder and swap a couple out. Most of my music is much stranger than ordinary popular music, since I have very limited influences and I am an aspie. My music varies in style a considerable amount, from funk, to metal to rock, to just plain chill. I enjoy trying interesting keys and time signatures and modulations. My favorite bands include Tool, Nine Inch Nails, Radiohead, A Perfect Circle... yeah... Flaming Lips... yeah...
So anyways, I also started singing in a band in 8th grade, and we've actually kinda stuck. I've had dozens of people tell me that I sound quite a bit like Maynard James Keenan of Tool and APC and I can't argue with them. I don't exactly have the whole tone and technique to singing figured out, but I've got some, and I've got an excellent sense of pitch. I also find it to be quite ironic that I look a lot like Johnny Greenwood of Radiohead.
Besides the band I joined in 8th grade, I have another group of friends who invited me to perform and compose for them, although that hasn't gone very far yet...
My current favorite hobby is Cod 4, since it's not quite Airsoft season yet. my teammates online frequently tell me that I get way too into the strategies in that game... but that's just because they're noobs. It's much more about tricking your enemy and using teamwork than just running around shooting people. I recently picked up on using the shotgun, which I went 30 and 5 with 3 times in a row. The basic strategy is just run around trying to dodge bullets, while filling them with lead with your gripped and steady aimed shotgun. As long as you have juggernaut and can dodge bullets effectively, you can easily kill a group of three to five enemies without a problem.
I only found out that I have Asperger Syndrome recently, when I was forced to do a report on it in health class, but after I read the description I immediately knew that I am indeed an Aspie.
Generally in school I just sit around in my own little bubble and think about strategies for a tactical encounter, (sounds crazy i know) or plan my schedule for the next unknown period of time. When I do get into a social encounter, I always have trouble with keeping eye contact and responding directly. I also always have bad posture. It's also surprising how many things I can take overly literal, which is my first response, but I always know what they mean, and because of that most people think that's my sense of humor. Also when I talk to people I tend to exaggerate the tone of my voice and my body language because otherwise I feel creepy and awkward, but now I feel like some hilarious actor or something.
I also feel very confused and disoriented without a schedule or a plan. I always plan what I'm going to do ahead of time, and can barely function if I don't. Another thing is that I get sooo intensely focused on things that I do (if I care about it) and just go for hours just doing that one thing and not even stopping to eat or take care of myself. There is nothing that I hate more than unexpected interruptions.
A lot of the time when I am with a group of people, I just sit and listen and don't say anything, just because everything I say that isn't way exaggerated with body language is extremely awkward, and everything I say that is way exaggerated with body language is still quite awkward, and when people ask me something directly I often don't know what to do or say and just smile (or get angry/withdrawn). Later on I'll usually go in my room and think and plan about what I should have done/said and act accordingly next time. Because of this self constructive criticism, I can handle a lot of different social situations. (unless I get caught focusing on something books or homework or some other related thing.
My dad is an alcoholic and is not wise enough to even remotely gain control over his lack of social skills. He still gets "angry and defensive" for no reason, but it's really just because he doesn't know how to react in social encounters.
Even so, I've never had problems with self esteem or depression. I'm very proud of myself. I am good at languages, music, and strategy. I've also got good reflexes. Plenty of people like me, because I'm generally nice, and I've picked up on enough social skills to possibly pass as a normal person... and even when I blow it and act awkwardly my lack of social skills usually just makes things more interesting and hilarious and not necessarily awkward, (although I may just think that because I'm an aspie) and the only people who do try to make fun of me just get smoked due to the fact that I am far more intelligent than them so any attempt they make to put me down really just ends up in me finding flaws in their logic.
I've never met someone who has been as joyful and content with life as myself.
Sorry for the length of my intro, it's just that i've never told anyone this much about myself, including my close friends and relatives, although most of them know most of this stuff.
23 Mar 2008, 10:14 pm
