strange... even for an aspie

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Hi everyone, this is the first forum I've ever logged into.

I'm now 16 years old, having my mom tell me about a year ago that my granddad, herself and I all have the syndrome. when my psychologist told me what the symptoms were, I didn't believe it. I still think I might have a similar syndrome, as even other people who have the syndrome can't relate to me. I know I got ADHD, and also hyperlexia, dyscalculia.

I'm a very good speaker, I also sung in a band for a while.
people also say that I've the artistic sense of my dad(Achnaton Nassar, dutch/egyptian artist)
I like drawing, with pencils or in 3D on the pc using 3DS MAX. I also like to edit videos.
except for the programs that i just named, I'm an anti-nerd when it comes down to computers.

also, I'm the most horrible mathematic in the world, which is f*****g up my school right now.
I go to the Johan de Witt-grammar school in dordrecht, Holland. the greatest school in the world, and Im also an idiot savant when it comes down to language( English,Dutch,French,German,Latin,Greek, and working on arabic), but the maths are killing my reports.

does anyone know what this means? the only thing that i recognize is that I feel alien in this world, but I quite like being an alien here.
i find it fascinating to look at how people behave. why some people like to f**k up others. why they deserve my fist in their face, if they are hurting my friends. most of the time i understand exactly whats happening, and most people wouldnt want me to know that much about them.
I myself was much bullied on the primary school, and the bullies were also people with "something" so to say. 1 is now in a clinic, 1 threw himself in front of the thalys high-speed train, 1 is now in prison and 1 is now on the run for the crime the other one is in prison for.

nowadays, I look quite intimidating to people who dont know me. I got long black hair, very big brown eyes, always with a bent left arm because it wont stretch anymore because of the fracture long ago. I have a loud voice, pretty low, and there's always loud music coming out of my headphones.(e.g. bullet for my valentine, secondhand serenade, underoath, rammstein, linkin park etc.)

people may say I listen emo, but metal is also welcome. it gives a vent, to cool anger and hate and aggression.
I also listen music like Teardrop from massive attack, and behind blue eyes from the who.

my life would be fairly normal, as normal as it can be with asp, if it wasn't for my girlfriend.

she is an angel. she is also somewhat of an outcast, and we are similar in many ways, but also very different. for example, she cant detect sarcasm in what someone says. something I do very well, I'm quite cynic in what i say.

but she means sooo much to me, I just feel secure when I look into her bright green eyes. only she can do that, not even my mother or anyone. only she can do that.

the only aspect of asperger that I really recognize is the sense of horror at some environmental influences. like when a knife scratches a plate. or when a crayon screeches a blackboard. nobody likes that sound, but it makes me scream. really scream loud.
things like non-natural looking light, like fluorescent lights, of when someone turns the light on in my room. I have to cover my eyes to keep myself in control.
thats why I keep my room always a bit dark.

some people say I got problems. I say my parents divorced, I get into trouble with my parents everyday, my school is f*****g me up. but also that my friends are the best people in the world, and that my girlfriend is my reason to live.

Doeg! Imanu

It's nice to hear from you, imanu. My name is Pete. I have Dutch heritage on both sides of my family. I was born and raised in Canada, in the pronvince of Ontario. I'm 29 years old, single and unemployed. I have a black & white cat named Dixie and a small apartment near Lake Ontario. It's a 200 year-old lakeside community called Clarkson Village. Clarkson is not far from where I grew up, in the larger city called Mississauga. Mississauga is itself close to the city of Toronto.

Welcome to WP!

Welcome to WP!

Keep in mind that Autism is a spectrum, and AS stretches along the spectrum itself. Not all aspies are math wizes, and discalcula is not uncommon. ADHD tends to run comorbid with it: I have it too and find it a lot more challenging than the AS personally.

As for others on the spectrum not being able to relate, also keep in mind that we are all individuals. We may have similar traits and all have different wiring from the neurotypicals, but that doesn't mean we are all wired the same way. And nurture is at least as important if not more so than nature... each of us adapts to our challenges in different ways and develop different attitudes about life. There is no AS cookie cutter.

Being irritated by the sounds you mention is not sensory overload. What you describe is hypercussis and is extremely common among non-autistic people. Hypercussis is caused by injury to nerves in the inner ear. From how you describe yourself you don't sound autistic at all.

Nice to meet you, Imanu.

Welcome aboard, Imanu! It's good to find another aspie out there.

Yeah, I can imagine how that feels. I don't know a single person living in my area that's an aspie, and to tell you the truth, I feel like a black swan among regular swans. But here, you know that there are others like you on here.

I meant with the annoying sounds, that it literally makes me scream. other people think I'm overreacting, but it makes me feel like my brain burns at that moment.
and there's another thing that may be a sign of being an aspie, but thats just because most aspies are really really clever. I got 148 for my IQ testing, and psychologists seem to be interested in me. I've had about 5 researches, and all the people redirect me somewhere else. but that might be the horrible bureaucracy in this country.

and also the extreme interest, the obsession that seems to be common. I have certain interests, but I don't think I'm obsessed. I tend to overdo things that I like. I've got top-notch modeling software, and also pretty good video editing software. currently working on an action movie, the first with complete 3D models in it, like a rocket-driven shopping cart, or missiles flying all over the place. gonna be awesome.