Hello,
I found this website (unfortunately) or (fortunately) - depending on how one might look at things.....because of the Freund tragedy.
I have family members who live very close to the Freunds in Aliso Viejo, CA. This situation has really shaken up my family and the neighborhood. I feel much sadness for everyone involved. (I live in So. California, abut 30 miles north of Aliso Viejo.)
Also - I have a close acquaintance whom I have suspected for quite a while may be an (undiagnosed adult) Aspie.
I have struggled (often) about continuing this relationship, (we met at church), but once the possibility of Asperger's was suggested to me by another friend, I read much about the condition on the web. (However, a link to this website never came up.)
In my heart I know and believe God wants us to be kind to everyone - this is not always easy. However, since I started learning about Asperger's it has became easier for me to deal with her somewhat "different attitudes and behaviors".
After reading much about Asperger's, I realized she meets so much of the criteria, including early childhood behaviors, which she has talked to me about.
She knows she has problems with people socially and at work, she thinks she has the word "victim" written all over her, and talks often about having problems making and/or keeping friends.
(As of today I have never even slightly suggested to her that she might have Asperger's.) At this point, I just don't think that would be the right thing to do......
However, my friend is very bright, and interested (at times) in current affairs, so I e-mailed a link to this site to her, (referencing the shooting in Aliso Viejo). Hopefully, she might see herself as she reads about Asperger's.
I know she needs understanding and compassion and all the friends she can have. She has only one other friend and her family (mostly estranged) live on the East Coast.
She faces so much rejection from people (it seems - this has gone on during her entire life) and suffers from such deep depression at times. I listen, tactfully try to suggest how she might deal with social situations differently, (she seems so willing to try change).
But often I just don't know what to say or just am so very amazed by some of the things she says and does! Now, I am not saying I am perfect.....but I do know for a fact, that I function much better socially than she does. (She is a much better photographer than I am.......)
I am grateful about finding out about this site - and for the information provided here and I hope that others too will be guided here for understanding about Asperger's.
Sorry for the long post. I probably will be here for information and (after this) not posting much.
But hopefully you Aspies will welcome an NT (I just learned that term) - who wants to learn and understand and possibly help others become more tolerant of those who may seem a "little different" from the mainstream.
As Scott Peck says in his book, "Life is difficult....."
Hopefully, awareness (generated by this website) will help make life less difficult for those with Asperger's (and for those around them).
Peace and hope to all,
Meg
05 Nov 2005, 2:29 pm
