Hi there, new and looking for support! :)

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Hello all! I have a two year old son (my only child), who has been "different" since birth, and a recent evaluation diagnosed him with Sensory Processing Disorder and Asperger's. This is what I was suspecting, as my husband has never been formally diagnosed, but upon reading all about it is convinced that this is what he (my husband) has, and he is not crazy after all. We also believe my husband's father (my son's grandfather) to definitely have Asperger's as well (as does he). My husband is somewhat of a genius, and extroverted, which has helped him "adapt" - although I witness his internal struggles on a daily basis.

This diagnosis is not shocking to me, but just breaks my heart a little bit only because I was somewhat of an outcast growing up (I am introverted and lacked confidence), and that is the last thing I would ever want for my son. I love him dearly and want to do whatever I can to help him be happy in his own skin and not to suffer from needless rejection or bullying....

I guess I am feeling numb right now, I want to cry...not because it changes who he is, at all...but not wanting him to have a hard life. I don't want to change him (except for helping him adapt to his sensory and emotional regulation issues, which make him miserable), but I guess I just wish I could change the world for him.

I would love to hear from anyone, especially from those with Asperger's themselves - any advice you think would help me in raising him as he grows up...anything that did or would have helped/not helped you personally. I guess I know an awful lot of data about Asperger's, but I would love to actually talk to others about practical means of helping my son be comfortable with who he is. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this, and I hope to hear from some of you!

Amanda

A pleasure to welcome you to the Wrong Planet community, Amanda. You may wish to visit the Parents’ Discussion Forum: http://www.wrongplanet.net/forum19.html

Oh, thank you!

Hi and welcome

My situation is slightly similar - I have a severely autistic child and I've recently discovered that I am mostly likely on the spectrum myself as that explains all the odd habits and feelings I've struggled with throughout my life. Like you, I am introverted and was bullied and excluded all through school. My ex hubby is also most likely AS, and sounds exactly like your hubby - he is very gifted, very extroverted but struggled with deep inner turmoil. My dad and uncle are both also likely to be on the spectrum.

Hope to see you around the site. I'm new here myself so not sure what advice to give so far - I'm still struggling with all this. I do believe, though, that we are in the best position possible to help our kids. Through you he will learn that it's ok to be different, he's a special person just like everyone else, but in a different way. My son is severe on the spectrum and non verbal, but I love him for who he is.

Exactly, redplanet, thank you so much for your reply! After reading about the differences between Aspie males and females I'm not entirely sure I myself don't have some mild form of it. I guess what is really thought provoking to me, is that I learned on some level that the things to do was stay away from those who were obvious weirdos, I guess so I wouldn't be picked on any more than I already was. I hated the attention, so I would rather have no friends and disappear. Reading these forums gives me the insight that I relate much more to Aspies than I ever thought I would. It is almost like an inability to be false or something, which is a large part of what attracted me to my husband. I had never met anyone like him before. I feel constantly scared for my son's future (right now), but reading these forums gives me a lot of hope and understanding. I think that many Aspies have beautiful souls, moreso than in the general population, if that makes any sense.

It is so wonderful to "meet" you.

To WrongPlanet!! !