Kelspook wrote:
A counterpart to the Haven was what I was aiming for. Same sort of protected status, but focussed on the happy rather than the depressed end of the emotional scale. Don't know if PPR would be the right place for it though, threads in there often seem to turn a bit confrontational. Would kind of defeat the object if you find yourself having to constantly defend your happy mood!
This has been an interesting endeavor from a sociology point of view though. I may do another poll, this time asking if people believe that Aspies can be truly happy. Many of the responses I got would suggest that a lot of folk don't think so. Sad.
First, no one is debating your happy mood.
Second, I actually want cheers, smiles and positivity.
What I am challenging is certain core tenets that you seem to have and seem to accept like the sun rising each morning. From my perception you see attitude and emotions as changeable as moving an arm. Fnord, and others on here seem to have this same sort of tenet as well. You guys see it as though it is a muscle to be moved voluntary.
I disagree with this. This runs counter to my experiences and what I read about human biology.
Let's define some definitions.
emotion: a natural instinctive state of mind deriving from one’s circumstances, mood, or relationships with others.
attitude: a settled way of thinking or feeling about someone or something, typically one that is reflected in a person’s behavior:
My attitude is based upon a series of emotions towards something or someone. My emotions come from my circumstances, mood, or relationships with others.
Based upon these definitions from the oxford dictionary is it true that My attitude and my emotions are reactions to outside stimuli?
You ascribe yourself to a belief system that goes against biology and goes against the definitions of what is set forth in the Oxford dictionary. Here is the kicker. People in America believe what you believe wholeheartedly and without question. Anyone who questions this and the tenet behind it is ostracized.
By the nature of questioning the tenet I'm accused of committing the sin of being negative. This tells me that questioning, challenging or debating positivity and the tenet it rests upon is not allowed and unacceptable. I already receive this in the outside world. You're trying to set up a forum that would do the same thing. If someone has an opposing view to yours conflict and confrontation will automatically be there. You want to stop that which means you want censorship.
I am so glad Tallyman sees this as well.
If you want genuine positivity from negative people then help people change their circumstances through specific and concrete means. Give them positive experiences. If someone is on disability then show them how to get and keep a job. Help walk them through how to write a proper resume. If someone doesn't know how to cook well and you do then show them how to do it.
If they say they cannot, ask them to tell you why they believe they cannot. Maybe they're missing information or they lack a prerequisite skill. If a person is confused about something then help clear up their confusion. If a person naturally sees flaws to things and this is who they are why aren't they allowed to be who they are especially when they're told all of their life to be true to who they are? This is what confuses me especially. I would love for people to sit down with me and clear stuff like this up.
Don't go into the positive affirmations that are vague, hackneyed and trite.
19 Feb 2013, 6:29 am
