MODERATOR ATTENTION: How to get help when you need it

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Thank you for that explanation, Walrus. I understand your POV and the sensitive nature of this topic. The only addition I would personally add, as a word of caution to members and mods alike, is that it isn't as easy as "pushing report" on inappropriate messages. Groomers operate like the frog in the boiling water analogy. No specific message seems inappropriate until it's too late, because groomers use many tactics to make their messages seem legitimate or safe in the context of a relationship, friendship, or rapport. They build trust in increments. Rarely do groomers send anything so shocking that it would be identified as problem material from the onset.

By the time the "groomee" realises they're being played and manipulated, the groomer often gaslights or intimidates them with blackmail and extortion. People are fearful of reporting and being shamed as "stupid" for falling for it, or being told that they should have known better. There's still a pervasive belief that victims of sociopaths, abusers, and other predators should have stopped it sooner, and this bias often works to the perpetrator's advantage by keeping victims silent. It's the same dynamic we've witnessed in the #Me Too campaign, and even here on WP when some people suggest women should "just leave" their abusers in domestic violence.

Thanks again for what you've written and for the warning. I think it's a start, and the only way we can go from here is to improve communication and understanding of all victims' rights.

^ Excellent point!

there is so much sex talk here lately outside the adult discussion

i havent had inappropriate pms tho which is surprising because usually im sort of prey to that kind of thing

FYI I think someone might have made old archived moderator attention thread viewable. viewtopic.php?t=67101&start=800

Thanks, reburied.

No worries.

Request moderators keep an eye on the Nashville school shooting thread because the shooter is being widely reported as transgender and has been described as very reserved and quiet

Thanks for the heads-up.

Request

this thread

be merged into

this thread

^ Thanks, done.

Request

this thread

be merged with

this thread

Done.

viewtopic.php?t=397592&p=9266978#p9266978

Please lock this thread, in case it turns into a minefield just because I had an opinion.

^ Done.

Another thread discussing excretory functions has been started  HERE .