Page 2 of 4 [ 63 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Hamnet
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 2

22 Jun 2009, 10:36 am

I have very strict privicy settings on mine, also it's set up so that nobody can add me as a friend, I have to add them first.
A couple of people have rejected my friend requests but to be honest, they were people I didn't really know that well so I wasn't that bothered.



riverotter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 970
Location: the frosty midwest

22 Jun 2009, 11:42 am

Hamnet wrote:
I have very strict privicy settings on mine, also it's set up so that nobody can add me as a friend, I have to add them first.

Brilliant! Good armor against former tormentors.



JerryHatake
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jul 2006
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,025
Location: Woodbridge, VA

22 Jun 2009, 10:34 pm

riverotter wrote:
Hamnet wrote:
I have very strict privacy settings on mine, also it's set up so that nobody can add me as a friend, I have to add them first.

Brilliant! Good armor against former tormentors.


I have to somewhat disagree with you, riverotter.

While having very strict privacy settings are good, your idea of good armour against former tormentors is not helping the helping process.

My Conflict, Trauma, and Healing course I took in the spring semester told me that healing is not complete without forgiveness.

People may disagree with me on the matter but in the end,forgiveness is required to be fully healing from the past.

The people who had bullied me in the past, I have let go of those memories since I have overcame those negative comments with my own sheer will and determination.

I have proving those individuals wrong with the achievements I have made in life.


_________________
"You are the stars and the world is watching you. By your presence you send a message to every village, every city, every nation. A message of hope. A message of victory."- Eunice Kennedy Shriver


riverotter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 970
Location: the frosty midwest

22 Jun 2009, 11:57 pm

JerryHatake wrote:
riverotter wrote:
Hamnet wrote:
I have very strict privacy settings on mine, also it's set up so that nobody can add me as a friend, I have to add them first.

Brilliant! Good armor against former tormentors.


I have to somewhat disagree with you, riverotter.

While having very strict privacy settings are good, your idea of good armour against former tormentors is not helping the helping process.

My Conflict, Trauma, and Healing course I took in the spring semester told me that healing is not complete without forgiveness.

People may disagree with me on the matter but in the end,forgiveness is required to be fully healing from the past.

The people who had bullied me in the past, I have let go of those memories since I have overcame those negative comments with my own sheer will and determination.

I have proving those individuals wrong with the achievements I have made in life.


Sounds like you have made a lot of personal progress, Jerry. It took a lot of hard work and you did it- "the best retribution is to lead a happy life." That is commendable.
I am dealing with it in a bit different way- to forgive, but not to forget: let me explain- one of my former tormentors found me on Facebook. I thought long and hard about it, blogged about it, talked to my mom about it. I realized that he had had a lot of problems too. Big problems that explain some of his behavior. Now I am working on a book/project/blog thing about grade school bullies and I think I am going to (try to) initiate a conversation with him about it. He was mean- why? I am going to try to help kids who are now getting bullied, using my experiences, and him finding me could be a key piece in helping others heal. We each heal in different ways. I like hearing others's experiences. Good luck on your journey.
You sound like you have some really good insight. Are you interested in getting interviewed? Online- email- by me- for my project? PM me if you might be interested.



raisedbyignorance
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Apr 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,225
Location: Indiana

23 Jun 2009, 7:57 pm

I don't care for it anymore. I only accept friends to keep track of what my classmates are up to these days. It's miserable to read about how they're doing so much better than me.

Originally my facebook was public. Not only did I have to privatize it, I had to stop putting up facebook photos because creepy guys were stalking me by communicating with me through my AIM. I HATE when people treat Facebook like a free dating service! I keep my phone, email, and AIM up info in case my friends ever want to keep in touch. Given how no one ever calls me, they clearly don't.

The applications have gotten annoying too. It's amazing how much time people have to waste on sites like that and Twitter.



pbcoll
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Feb 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,892
Location: the City of Palaces

23 Jun 2009, 8:23 pm

I don't really care either way much - I have it, it's convenient in some ways, but it's no big deal and I don't use it that much. I've added some people I like and who moved away and stuff, and there are a number of people there that I accepted - it costs me nothing to accept people so I've accepted nearly everyone who's added me. An exception was a former bully (ironically, the only person from school to have ever added me) - I don't know why he added me but I have no interest in friending him or knowing anything about his life - while I do think many bullies have all sorts of problems, I don't think it's universal and my bullies are probably well-adjusted and successful.

I read somewhere about some application that gives you a voucher for a (real) whopper if you unfriend something like ten people - does anyone know anything about it and does it work in the UK? There are some people I'm going to unfriend, if I can get a whopper out of it in the process, so much the better.


_________________
I am the steppenwolf that never learned to dance. (Sedaka)

El hombre es una bestia famélica, envidiosa e insaciable. (Francisco Tario)

I'm male by the way (yes, I know my avatar is misleading).


Ralic
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 22 Jun 2009
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 53
Location: Far away from home...

24 Jun 2009, 8:15 am

I actually like Facebook. For one, it helps me take care of peoples' names, something I have problems remembering... For another, it's a way to talk to people without direct contact. It's great to simply ask people what the homework was or ask to be a member of some group, or just be aware of exchanged information. I found it very useful. I generally prefer online to face-to-face with people I don't know well.

I accept everyone and give them a chance. If they don't ever write anything on my wall and if I have no use for them in any other way I delete them since I don't think there's a point keeping them, and while I have 15 friends they have 600 so...



EtotheC
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 89

24 Jun 2009, 12:25 pm

CaptainTrips222 wrote:
Sort of... half the people from my college I've requested have rejected me. I swear, I almost have a better chance if I didn't know them in advance. I'll never understand what the Hell people had against me at my four year college. My worst offense was being to myself in the dorms, but even then I was at least polite to them and social on occasion. People at my junior college were a little more receptive, for what reason I don't know why.

Anyway, just venting. I know it shouldn't matter what other people think of you, but it's hard not to be curious sometimes. I pretend like I don't care, but I really do.


I actually went on Facebook because a lot of people I know kept pestering me to join, hardly ever log in, but it is useful to talk to my international acquaintances.I'm the opposite, now random people from my college are asking me to "friend" them...

Weird website... don't get why some people are so obsessed with it...



Solei
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 80

24 Jun 2009, 7:41 pm

Actually... I like Facebook. It makes things easier to keep in touch with people, since most of my high school friends are split up all over the world and I'm very bad with phone calls and such. Plus, most of the people I know aren't jerks enough to defriend people for no reason at a random time.

I won't say that Facebook doesn't have flaws, however. I don't like how public your profile can be, and you can't really tell how private your facebook really is, even after the settings. I once got this friend request from some person I never heard of in a state I've never been and who's also 4 times older than me. And that was when I thought I had my facebook set up so only friends could view my profile. That was creepy. o_0 And I hated that offer from Burger King that would give you a free burger for defriending 10 people. What kind of offer is that?!

I think some parts of it are overrated, but I do find it very useful.



roadGames
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 401

24 Jun 2009, 11:03 pm

I'm pretty sure I'm going to delete my account as soon as I graduate this summer. I am in regular contact with none of the people on there and I don't really care what becomes of 90% of them. The only plus I see to it is girls you meet befriending you on there if you were too chickenshit to get their number, which it is pretty amazing for. I have a couple friends that never did any of this social networking stuff, and I think they made good decisions.



Eire
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 465
Location: California

25 Jun 2009, 1:03 am

Rainbow-Squirrel wrote:
I pretty much hate it too, a lot of people from a past I just want to leave behind have popped up again and as I'm always trying to be nice I have accepted them, bad memories have been brought back up, recently I'm just ignoring everything coming from it.


Same here. I think I'm going to delete a bunch of them soon. No point in keeping people on there who I don't care about and bring up bad memories.



riverotter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 970
Location: the frosty midwest

25 Jun 2009, 4:36 am

Solei wrote:
I once got this friend request from some person I never heard of in a state I'v never been and who's also 4 times older than me. And that was when I thought I had my facebook set up so only friends could view my profile. That was creepy. o_0

Probably somebody just clicked on your avatar photo; you can see photos of other ppl's friends- wouldn't worry about that one too much.
Solei wrote:
And I hated that offer from Burger King that would give you a free burger for defriending 10 people. What kind of offer is that?
I think that's some kind of urban legend. Or a rumor started by Google, MySpace, or Classmates.com.



AnonymousAnonymous
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 73,202
Location: Portland, Oregon

25 Jun 2009, 2:37 pm

MySpace, Facebook, nor Twitter interest me at all.


_________________
Silly NTs, I have Aspergers, and having Aspergers is gr-r-reat!


Solei
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 80

25 Jun 2009, 4:10 pm

riverotter wrote:
Solei wrote:
I once got this friend request from some person I never heard of in a state I'v never been and who's also 4 times older than me. And that was when I thought I had my facebook set up so only friends could view my profile. That was creepy. o_0

Probably somebody just clicked on your avatar photo; you can see photos of other ppl's friends- wouldn't worry about that one too much.
Solei wrote:
And I hated that offer from Burger King that would give you a free burger for defriending 10 people. What kind of offer is that?
I think that's some kind of urban legend. Or a rumor started by Google, MySpace, or Classmates.com.

Yeah, but this guy was a total stranger, and I don't think he was on my friends' friends list. I don't know where he would've heard of me.

I'd like to think that, but there were news articles and groups about it, and a whole news section on Burger King finally retracting it when they realized the consequences of the offer.



pbcoll
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Feb 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,892
Location: the City of Palaces

25 Jun 2009, 4:53 pm

Solei wrote:
And I hated that offer from Burger King that would give you a free burger for defriending 10 people. What kind of offer is that?!


A convenient one if you're going to unfriend people you no longer like anyway. Too bad they retracted it, I just unfriended a bunch of people and didn't get a free meal out of it.


_________________
I am the steppenwolf that never learned to dance. (Sedaka)

El hombre es una bestia famélica, envidiosa e insaciable. (Francisco Tario)

I'm male by the way (yes, I know my avatar is misleading).


ww
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jun 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 128

28 Jun 2009, 10:25 pm

Keith wrote:
What about your own family members actively rejecting a request?


HA! KEITH, THAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME!! !! What is their problem?! Never did anything to them. Oh, well.