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gamefreak
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19 Mar 2007, 8:58 pm

I hate Parties!! !! !! !! !! I also don`t like being around people because i usally get rejected or
made fun of.

Tatoon
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27 Mar 2007, 1:21 pm

GoatOnFire wrote:

For us aspies in college it seems that parties are frequently a pain in our collective posterior ends. Some of us don't enjoy the loud music and dancing. Some of us don't want to drink. Some of us just wish we'd get invited. Some issues are covered better than others for aspies on advice on how to do things. Partying is seen by some as a deviant behavior by some so there is very little information out there for aspies who want advice about how to deal with parties if we want to go to them.

I'm all confused about party etiquette. Half of the guys on my floor are in the same frat, they always hold a party at the same time in the same house every week and they encourage me to go to their parties. I've noticed something recently that is bugging me. I seem to be the only one who goes to the parties alone without any friends. Even though it seems to me that everyone there is too drunk to notice. Does anybody know if it is considered weird to go to a party alone?

it's not weird, but if you don't talk to nobody you will not have a good time and the time will be wasted. and remember, you're right, "everyone there is too drunk to notice". you have to ask yourself wether you really want to be there or not.

lemon
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01 Apr 2007, 10:26 am

i think parties are for fun and it's up to you to decide whether and how you like it. if you've got plenty of girls around and over you i don't think anyone would consider it 'un-cool', they might be jealous though

not that my opinion counts, i'm not a young student anymore (i'm an old student so surrounded by young students quite often), don't need a man because i've got one, and for parties or concerts or whatever i preferto go on my own, it means i have to ignore men who want to approach me (something you get used to) but i get the advantage of not having to talk all night. i only go out because i like dancing.
(sometimes i do ask one of my brothers or occasionaly friends to come along, but these are people i know for so long already, they know how i act, just dancing no talking)

hyperbolic
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01 Apr 2007, 11:41 am

I've never been to a party for someone else other than in elementary school, none of which I really remember well.

So, would it be better to go to a party where everyone is drunk, and where I am not even drinking, so that my social skill deficits go more unnoticed?

lemon
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01 Apr 2007, 11:53 am

calandale wrote:

BeyondInfinity wrote:

I think that drinking games seem to make it easier for me to interact at a superficial level with peers, all you have to do is learn the rules and play the game...this usally prevents me from ending up sitting alone on a sofa at a party. I find that drinking culture is full of simple behaviors that are easy to observe and imitate, and if i'm feeling really detached saying "i'm just drunk" will instantly apease a NT

Yeah. They always seem more accepting of me when I'm drunk. I actually think that something happens in my brain when I drink (or am extremely tired) which actually allows me to give the right body signals.

or maybe you are at ease with yourself when you're drunk, i'm beginning to notice that more than lacking social skills aspies suffer a very high self-judging issue, look how we are talking and thinking of every detail in our actions in thousands of threads, it's incredible, we're so highly introspective. nt's would just pull their shoulders and not care, like bah, what does it matter.
but we will go on focus, analyse, wonder if it can be improved, put it in another light, another angle, question it, test it, etc
and apparantly it doesn't bore us to share this with others who are analysing just as we do,
most of us can spend hours here, i don't know many places where i could be out of my free will listening to others and replying to them for so long every day

sorry a little off topic

for parties it's true 97 % of the people are drunk, so they don't notice anything at all

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