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I'm just feeling more and more lost in College

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Coopre
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21 Dec 2010, 7:05 pm

I don't know, I guess it's just all piling up...

Me and my companion, have cut ourselves off from our prior peer group, they couldn't deal with me, and began to disentangle their sociable arms from us. My companion, by associating with me, has also been tarred with the ''Weird intellectual type'' brush...

It's like they all live on the surface,and whenever I talk to them I'm forced by social convention into this sorta, tenth Doctor, david tennant role. Weird, loud, english eccentric with leadership skills... This forces me into the little metal box in the black hole in my chest, and the combined stress of family life, college and exams is just, doing in my health.

I'm new here, very new and even the stress if that is making me shake, I don't know how to feel less alone, or less stressed

people fear for my health.. I hate that



lelia
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21 Dec 2010, 7:28 pm

That's an interesting metaphor.
I was living at home my first two years of college, and then married the next two, so I can't really give you any advice other than to maybe go to a counselor who can expand your list of options: change of clubs, change of major, change of college, change of hours, change of dorms or living arrangements, change of work, change of hangouts, change of exercise etc.


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techn0teen
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22 Dec 2010, 3:46 pm

You need to stop going by their social rules. If you feel pressured by them to be something you are not, stay away from them. That "black hole" in your chest is what I felt before. It is an anxiety. That feeling is a poison that will paralyze you. It is caused by holding yourself back or doucting yourself. It will make you sick.

Keep in mind you are at college to get an education and not socialize. Its sad to say but true.
But its great that your one companion that has stayed by your side. It is very rare to have that in college. I wish I had that.

Exams are stressful. The only thing I can say is keep yourself preoccupied by studying. You have to work hard but I know you can do it if you replace the fear of failure with the will to succeed.