I have problems with the NT based education system

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Hi, I am twelve years old, mid-way through seventh grade and I am noticing that the NTs that run the school do not help at all.
Specifically my problem is with the special education teachers that refer to themselves as "experts." Everyday, all my friends, teachers, and (some) acquaintances don't care that I have Aspergers (or just don't know I can't tell,) but the special ed. people try to change me and also what ticked me off is for my service learning project (I live in Maryland, and I have to do a service learning project to pass middle school,) I had to do a "walk-a-thon" for Autism Speaks, and I had no say in the matter. Please help me what to do.

I'll give you advice though..

Don't let Aspergers define who you are.
You can use it as leverage in the sense that you can sometimes get an easier road,

but it more often makes life difficult for you don't it?

Don't let -it- guide you.

Be guided by your sense for purpose. What do you like? At a young age you're still discovering who you are,
At some point,
You will get a strong sense for a personal compass, and that compass will guide you it will be like a wind at your back.

A 12yr old has no sails. you're up ****'s creek with no paddle.

Go to Open Culture dot com and look for conformity isnt a recipe for excellence by george carlin (video)

It might be better for you if you don't tell people you have Asperger's and try to get along as a regular human being.
Of course, you still have to work hard to fit into society and complete everything. But, unless you have some sort of way of making money to support yourself, you're going to have to fit into society like any NT eventually.

Having gone through so much of this with my son, I understand your frustration. We've spent quite a bit of time arguing with school administration over grading rubrics, and just recently had a nice run in over service hours. My son would soooo very much agree with your post!

On the grading rubrics, I'm going to say that as unfair as they seem, they are actually more reflective of the way the world of work will work than high stakes testing (which my son would prefer), and learning to thrive in them will prove to be a life skill. I still hate it, however, but I joined committees and had meetings and could barely make a dent. They want school to indicate future success, and not just how smart you are. But I really mourn the loss of that purity, when school really was just about how well you learned the material.

I had to agree with my son on the service hours, why he had to work on a fundraising project to get his 5 service hours when he'd already spend 20 hours in the past month gathering food for the needy and doing construction for the elderly was beyond either of us. I did find that a short conversation with his instructor seems to have fixed that for NEXT semester if not this one (they were gung-ho about doing something that specifically helped the SCHOOL community, so I told them my son would find it much more meaningful if he volunteered doing something like taking gum out from under desks, which he is more than willing to do). Unfortunately, my son has difficulty making that type of connection, seeing that if he offers C instead of arguing A v. B, he might get the best result, which is why I jumped in. The answer to your dilemma is going to be in finding a C option. So ... My suggestion is to ask the teachers what their goal is in asking you to do service hours, and then brainstorm with your parents what might meet that goal while being meaningful to you. There has to be something that will strike a chord with you AND meet their goal; you just have to find it, and propose it to them. I'm afraid the NT world isn't always very good at hands-on service, and is much more comfortable just raising money and letting others do the hands-on service. Showing your teachers that you want to be HANDS-ON, and not two steps removed, should help you get to something meaningful, and hopefully they will be able to understand why that resonates better for you.

I do think your school is underestimating your ability to choose for yourself, and be your own advocate. Approaching them in a mature and sensible way (get your parent's help on how that can be done) coudl help them see that they are not giving you enough credit, and should consult you more. Could you write an easy about why many adults with Aspergers are not fond of Autism Speaks, and see if that sparks a conversation? Or just ask to meet with the teacher who made that decision, and calmly explain to her why you did not find that an appropriate service project, including an explanation of what you know about the conflicts many adults with AS have with the organization? You state your case, say "thank you for your time," and that is the end of it. No arguing, no requests. Just make a mature case in the hopes they will make better choices for future students.

The way my son and I talk about these things is this: every game has rules, and in many ways school and life is just another game. If you can learn the rules, and play by them, you will eventually get to your goals. You don't have to find every step in the game interesting or meaningful; you just have to do it, because succeeding in that step means you get to the next level. Not much different than if you were playing a video game.

I wish you the best of luck. Don't be afraid to talk to your parents about these things, too, and get them on your side. You are still learning how the game is played, and they've been playing a lot longer. So they may know a thing or two about getting around the obstacles.

If I was in your shoes, I would voice my opinion on that. Even if I did have a choice, I wouldn't do it (because it's Autism Speaks).

Middle School is the worst years of your educational career. It'll all be over soon.

thats what i do, i try my best to survive in NT classes and i refuse help because im stubborn, though it does damage my grades im still doing better than most NTs

i have 210/220 credits required to graduate so i should have all 220 credits by the end of this week since it's the end of the semester

There are pros and cons both ways, but overall with my son having the school know has made things miles better. Without that my son wouldn't be allowed a netbook in class. In general, for a twelve year old, it isn't going to be the child's decision, and I don't think it is productive to get him wondering if his parents made the right call. In my experience parents are VERY careful about getting and sharing labels.

The educational system is structured in a way that NTs can learn best. They focus heavily on social interactions and auditory learning. Try to figure out what kind of learning style works best for you and how you can use that to your advantage. You may have situations in life where you have to take personal responsibility for teaching yourself a subject in a way that makes sense to you. Listening to some prof talk for hours may not be enough to pass the course. I found that I'm a visual learner, I memorize anything I write down, and organizing data into problem solving maps helps.

If you don't like the way the supposed experts are treating you at school talk to your parents and ask for their help. It's hard to get people to take your opinion seriously at your age, but they will listen to your parents or another adult you trust who speaks for you. You shouldn't be forced to participate in an autism speaks walk if you don't want to.

It bothers me that your teachers place themselves on such a lofty and undeserved pedestal. No one should try to force you to be someone other than who you are. Autism has it's difficulties, but I think it's a gift. You have abilities those teachers will never have.

Years will go by and you'll move on in life and achieve great things, those teachers... well they'll still be stuck in middle school. ; )

Being an aspie at school can be good and bad. With the way schooling is structured it is generally set up terribly if you're like me.
The good thing is the way schooling is graded (In australia) Is that the government gives the school something that the students have to demonstrate to a sertain level, meaning if you ask the teachers(School or government if you have to) you can usually restructure the projects and education into something you have an interest in.

(For example my sose project was to make an essay about african children staving. I managed to change that essay into an essay on the lions becoming extinct in the wild and how it has to be stopped, and how it can be stopped)
On face value the projects are similar but the one I've given is frankly more harder and also more unique. Meaning most of the time the schools have no problem with it.
So in summary you have to try and replace one project which doesn't interest you, with another similar project that does interest you and yet demonstrates all the skills needed.

And PE teachers are renowned for being the worst possible match for an aspie... The very nature of most PE teachers is unmoving and dominant making it very hard. You need to make sure the PE teacher understands about you. If worse comes to worse you may have to tell the school you can't do that class(I couldn't do PE because the teacher was completely close minded and was constantly trying to change me. Not to mention all the times they misinterpret me and end up shouting at me. This resulted in the school accepting that I won't do that class.)



Keep in mind that all I've said is my experience with schooling in australia, I assume it should be structured the same or similarly but apologize if it isn't. I also don't know how accepting schools/government in other countries are on this subject so it may be incorrect for others...