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Kiseki94
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26 Oct 2012, 11:47 am

This is a continuation of my other "Roommate Issues" post. Please refer back to that to understand what I'm talking about here.

A few days ago, her mom texted my mom (Yes, HER mom texted MY mom). asking if she [my roommate] could borrow $10 from me. First of all, I was at home for the weekend and she has my number and could have sent me a text message. Secondly, the reason that the she "needed" the money was that she was running out of cash, and she wanted to buy a shirt for breast cancer awareness week. When I returned, I noticed that she bought a box of doughnuts and two 2L bottles of soda. Obviously, money management is a problem here.
Edit: I have yet to see that shirt. My mom gave her the money...WTF?

She is 20 and I am 18...why does she bring our parents into this? If she wanted to borrow money, she should have just asked me (not that I would have lent it to her). Well, on the bright side, she is going to Argentina next semester and residential life is going to let me have the room to myself.

Another problem: I had to survey 25 students around campus for a sociology project, and I told my roommate that I was nervous about approaching strangers. She replied with, "why does it matter? It's not like any of them will want to be your friend, anyway?" I wasn't sure how to react this....I just ignored her. :wall:

I did go to the disability office, but the director is useless. She didn't want to listen to anything I had to say. Each time I brought up an issue, she replied with, "she's [my roommate] a really sweet girl". (I talked to my RA and I might be able to switch rooms with someone else.)

Today at lunch, she told me that she didn't go to bed until 4:15 am. She said that she had so much fun last night and I miss a lot when I go to bed so early. I went to bed at 11:00 pm because I have a class at 9:00.

She also follows me around like a lost dog. She eats every meal with me and tags along when my mom comes to visit.



DylanLarkins
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26 Oct 2012, 12:59 pm

You're at school for one purpose: to get an education. Everything else has to be secondary in your mind... yes, a less-than-ideal roommate can be annoying and distracting, but reminding her that you are trying to actually do well in school will probably work in at least some situations.



Kiseki94
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26 Oct 2012, 2:04 pm

She is really incompetent and no matter how many times she is reminded her behavior never changes. Obviously, if I need a quiet place to study I go to the library, but I also need to sleep.

Honestly, I think I the director of disability services put me with her because no one else can stand her. I don't like being very blunt or rude, but it has gotten that bad.



Kiseki94
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31 Oct 2012, 4:34 pm

Update: She has started to attack my sister with her rude comments. The other day she said to my sister, "what are you going to do if you don't get accepted to this school?" Have some respect!! My sister is 13!

My sister also liked a post on my college's meme page, and the girl had the audacity to comment (directed at sister) "girl, just wait until you go here." This is seriously getting to me. I know sometimes people with Asperger's say things that seem rude, but there is no way a person can be that unaware of the meaning of their speech.



Dantac
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31 Oct 2012, 8:17 pm

I'd say you need to use the semester that she is in Argentina to get yourself a different room-mate or better yet, a room for yourself.

I agree with the above poster. You're there for your education not to socialize or babysit this person. You do what you need to do in order to achieve your goals.


...oh, and do try to slip into any conversation you may have with her mother about how those 10 bucks were apparently misused, that if this girl needs money or help with anything to contact you and not do it underhandedly as it was done (her mother surely knew this is what it was) and that you are irritated that this girl doesn't come home to sleep until past 5am (that will get HER mom going hahaha).



travelplus
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01 Nov 2012, 9:49 pm

First of all I am so sorry to hear of your problem. When you have a disability you are protected by the ADA and Disabled Student Services which extends to the housing.

You are so right the Mother of your roomate had no reason to contact your Mother to borrow money. Also since you were home this immature roomate should have asked her parents for money and not brought you into this.

Since she used the money for other things and lied I would report her to your RA for lying to you and for texting your Mother without your permission.

I would then ask for a room all to yourself for the remainder of your studies. You do not deserve to be treated like this.

Why did the school put you with a rude roommate who is so inconsiderate. I thought they would at least follow the roomate survey you filled out at the onset of the semester. They very well knew you have a disability and could have found a roomate who would understand your disability.

If I was place with a roomate with a disability such as yours I would see how I can help you. If I needed to borrow money I would ask you nicely not expecting you to agree to it and would pay you back ASAP.

You see your rights have been violated and I think the Director of Disabled Services needs to work on your situation or be fired. This is part of his/her job title to mediate in situations like this.



Musicluv90
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09 Jan 2013, 11:42 am

You should contact you RA and tell them that you no longer feel comfortable in your room. Most residence life departments pride themselves on creating spaces that are safe for all parties occupying a room. If your RA fails to do anything talk to your resident director or your Housing director. Also keep a log of when you spoke to your RA and whether or not the issue was resolved. RA's like to weasel their way out of things by attempting to shirk the responsibilities of on residents.