School in the Past - The Future coming...

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While I was in high school, I did and said a lot of things that were inappropriate and untrue. I have trouble interacting with younger women, as though if they are related to me or not. I feel like that school was the place for me to find a "High School crush." Even though most of the girls had boyfriends, I had told school authorities untrue and inappropriate lies that got me sucked into residential treatment for no reason, then into legal co-guardianship of my parents when I returned home after turning 18, continuing to say inappropriate things about females, as well my dad's nieces - then having sexually inappropriate behaviors in school - not to mention masturbating in the bathroom, then announcing it to the students, my former psychologist signed medical papers telling the judge about everything I did.
The things I can't do, legally, are I can't purchase, handle, transport, or possess a gun, I can't drive, and I can't handle my medical bills, insurance, or draw up my treatment plans. School throughout 2006-2008 was pure Hell for me. I've never had a girlfriend in my entire life. I will be turning 23 on March 17th - Saint Patrick's Day - which is a day I go to church. I go to a black church, and I have made acquaintances with the older ladies. Most of them have a BlackPlanet account, and I have one as well, even though I'm white.
As well, in school, I had 0 friends. I scared them by pretending to fix a bayonet to a C.S. Richmond Rifle, or pretending to load a C.S. Richmond rifle. I would also always pretend I'm shooting at a Union soldier, engaging in battle, and drawing a lot of gruesome Civil War scenes, such as a soldier shooting at another soldier, a soldier bayoneting another soldier, a soldier clubbing another soldier with the butt of his rifle, etc. The same with the World War I pictures. I drew gruesome pictures of either an allied soldier either shooting or bayoneting a German soldier, an allied soldier firing a Browning machine-gun at German troops, or troops being gassed by poison gas.
I also talk to myself like I'm talking to another soldier. I have imaginary friends who are soldiers, and I carry on a conversation with myself like I'm talking to him, giving military orders, etc. the people in school thought I was weird, crazy, and obnoxious.
As the present is now, all of my psychological evaluations have negative reports in them, and they will affect my ability to access academic accommodations, as well as extra-curricular activities.
If I ever had somebody to talk to who would understand my pain, sorrow, and guilt, like I did once before last year, it would be nice to have a buddy to talk to by email.