My daughter is 8 and loves school. She is integrated into general ed most of the day and has a paraeducator with her much of the time. She is extremely social and has many friends, both on the spectrum and NT. Previously, whenever I'd try to ask her about how her day was at school, I would get very abbreviated, 1-word answers, no matter how open ended or specific my questions. Sometimes she would reply, "I don't know" or "I don't want to talk about it." This year, though, she absolutely will not talk about school and seems in distress when I ask. I love to find out what my kids are doing, their favorite and least favorite parts of the day, etc. so not asking, well, sucks.
It came to a head last week when she got off the bus and started yelling and growling at me to never ask her about school again. I said I wouldn't. The following day, I simply asked, "How are you?" and she flipped. We came to an agreement -- she won't yell or growl and me when she gets off the bus, and I won't ask her about school, but I -will- ask how she's doing. She was fine with that.
Any thoughts on her distress over talking about school? She still says she love school, loves her teachers, loves the time with her friends. At the beginning of the year, she told my partner that once she gets home, school is like a daydream, and kind of fuzzy. I guess I don't understand. She will insist she doesn't know if I ask whether she had PE or music that day (and she most definitely knows the difference). As much as she loves school, she -hates- work. Especially writing (and she has many modifications in place for that). But I don't see how that might translate into a refusal to talk about school. Her teachers say she has not had a tantrum yet this year, and the behavioral plan we instituted last year has not been needed. Help?!
11 Nov 2013, 5:44 pm
