Age Gap in High School
I'm sure plenty of you guys have had friends in high school who are not in your grade level, and that's a nice thing to have. This is the case with some of my friends, who are all really close top each other. I get to see this group of people during chorus since high school chorus is one group. We're all sopranos, so I get to sit by them too, and on random days we don't sing we all sit in the back of the room and act like typical anime children. Well, not so much me; I'm known as "the sane one". (Oh, if only they knew . Sure, I'm quiet and don't say inappropriate things, but I'm like them more than they know.)
Back to topic: age gaps are normal. This one is harder for me to get around though. They're freshmen and sophomores, and I'm a senior. I'm 5'6", and the two sophomores are tiny. One's 5'2" with a small frame, and the other's 4'9". Of the 9th graders, one might be taller than me but is fun and silly- which is awesome, but seems to exemplify the gap even though that's just her and I was still quiet as a freshman. The other one there is the shortest of all (4'7"? 4'8"?) and I don't know how to describe her. I think I accidentally offended her or something because she doesn't seem to like me. There's another freshman maybe 2 or 3 inches shorter than me, but she had to change schools and can't be in chorus. She can come to the after school stuff we're all in together, but, I don't know, she's one of them.
TL;DR (whatever that stands for): They all just seem a lot younger, out of wackiness and/or height and/or- I don't know, they just do. I feel like I don't belong in their group. I'm a giant and they can talk about next year while I graduate in the spring. There's the Aspie thing too, and the mental part of me that deals with some of the same things they do, but doesn't know how to tell them. Besides them, I have 2 other friends, both in my grade. It's nice to have expressed my frustrations. Comments of any kind...?
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Note: I am depressed. My ability to enjoy/partake in/follow any interests/hobbies/friends is severely limited at this time. Thank you for your understanding.
I have experienced an age gap with schoolmates and coworkers most of my life. It does present differences, and often makes it more difficult to fit in with the predominant group. Combined with Asperger's, I generally do not fit in.
I have come to find that is not a bad thing though. When I do "fit in" I can quickly become overwhelmed by the increased social interaction. It has helped me to actively reject internalizing society expectations of how social I should be.
(Song Cue: Gloria Gaynor, "I Am What I Am")
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"Righteous indignation is best left to those who are better able to handle it." - Bill W.
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