how to cope with a mean professor?

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the head of my department has a superiority complex and is just a really horrible person to deal with. we have never gotten along and I have always been one of the few people to argue against his matter-of-fact point of view, but never in a rude way just in an honest way. I don't ever try to draw attention to the fact that we don't get along either, I just don't interact with him unless I have to and I try to be as respectful and pleasant as possible when I do. but since I don't worship him like a lot of other people do, he doesn't feel the need to be respectful to me, and I think he gets off to bullying me. he purposefully tries to provoke me on regular basis and normally I just ignore it, but lately it's been getting a lot worse. he actually treats me like a dog, and I don't think dogs should be treated that way either. like he always asks me to repeat the most obvious things, like he doesn't think I can comprehend basic sentence structure and meaning. if he was just some regular as*hole it would be different because there would be no reason to hold back any of these frustrations but since he abuses his power as the head of the department I feel like I'm trapped in this situation where my education is suffering and I can't do anything about it. any advice?

He sounds a bit narcissistic.

Would it help to remember that this situation is only temporary?

I've had to deal with a similar professor in the past. Some people think they can treat you like dirt if you're different. I like to go by the quote "Don't tell people how to treat you. Show them." I think you're doing the right things by being the bigger person and acting respectful. Ignoring rude behavior helps, but only to a point. And acting snarky may just make his behavior toward you even worse, so I wouldn't recommend that. It's important in this case to be pleasant but firm and self-advocate. For instance, if he says something negative about you, politely say you respect his perspective but you also noticed x or y time when the opposite has been true. If he asks you to repeat something, repeat it with more sophisticated vocabulary so he gets the hint you're not going to let him make you feel unintelligent. Once school is over, you will likely not have to communicate with him again. Still, you may find yourself dealing with similar types of people in the future. So it's good to address how you will respond to such treatment now.

I agree with tropicalcows. He has noticed that you aren't kissing up and is poking at you to get you to mess up.

Because he is in a position of high power over you, there is not a lot you can do officially. But on a human to human basis you can regain enough power to make him leave you alone.

If he is baiting you by saying something that you can't reply to politely, or cannot answer, just say, "okay" and then do whatever you want anyway. If he catches you disobeying something, just say "sorry" do the minimum of what he says, then go back to doing whatever you wanted to do. Do not say anything else. "okay" "sorry" or perhaps "sure" should be the extent of your vocabulary if he makes you mad or if you're in trouble.

If he looks at you when you are dealing with him, there is a trick that will turn power back into your favor. Look at his eyes while he's looking at you and talking, then drift your eyes away from his. Don't dart your eyes away, drift. It will make him sense that you are not interested in him and he will lose confidence.

I've also had to deal with a pathological narcissist who called herself a teacher. She was a lot like you describe, and always looking to bask in the attention someone else was getting in order to make others see her as both special and an intellectual authority. She would poison other people's perspectives on me when I had done nothing to her. She would bully me behind my back like the coward she is, harass me and stalk my family. That creature is one dangerous sicko. So what did I do?

I facilitated situations where she could just freely be herself and she eventually got what she had coming. If they mess with you, give them all the rope they want and they'll hang themselves. You just need to figure out how this particular vermin ticks and tailor the circumstances suitably for his downfall.

Their main weakness are their egos. Thin-skinned, they can't take criticism that injures their sense of self. If you ridicule them in front of others you'll be hitting hard, but this can seriously backfire if you don't have allies. If done well this can be very effective. If you outsmart them in front of other people you'll also make them think twice before messing with you face to face, especially if they're the cerebral narcissist type. They'll probably just talk behind your back like the cowards they are, but there isn't much you can do against this reaction unless you really break them.

I suggest you don't take the passive route. They need to continue doing things such as bullying in order to validate themselves, especially in front of other people, and asking for respect is not going to make them respect you.

Did you know that you can choose to simply not respond at all, even if they have asked you a direct question or given you a direct comment? Ignore him.

I give them a blank look with a slightly furrowed brow, as if they are a confusing specimen of starfish I caught a glimpse of. Then I return to whatever I was doing without making a sound or reacting in any way. This actually makes them look totally dumb if they ever attempt to escalate with a raised voice, repeating their question, or making any other comments. And they feel that, so they tend to shut up and leave you alone.

If they are totally useless as a teacher then you will need to do most of your studying from texts or other resources for the class you're taking. And if you can take good notes, you can simply "parrot back" the guy's lectures most of the time for high marks. Depending on the subject.

The teacher for most of my courses is real annoying, so I focus on the course.

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