Going to boarding School

Post Reply New Topic

I am 19 years old and was diagnosed with Asperger's Disorder at the age of 4, I think. My high school I graduated from is grades K-12 for people with different learning differences, ADD, ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, and conditions like that. I am going to boarding school this year for a post-graduate year. (I graduated from high school this June 2008 and feel that the gradual change will help me when I get to college.) Today, is Wednesday, September 3, 2008. Registration at the boarding school starts this Saturday, September 6.

Although I will be there for one year, I want to make the best of it. I am friends on Facebook with my roommate whose cousin and close friend back home who have been diagnosed with Asperger's Disorder. He was fine with me telling him. My dad did not tell me about my diagnosis until this past December 2007. I attended a university summer program for high school students and got along all right, but was not aware of my behavior and Asperger's Disorder.

I have read the DSM-IV TR electronically at a local university library computer and learned about AD. Any advice would be great. I never had a roommate before. The only time I had roommates was when I went to sleep-away camp in 200 and 2001, each for two-week sessions.

Go straight to college and skip the boarding school.

If you could handle a college program and high school, then you should handle the real thing.

If not, then you'll learn to, which is what the real world expects, anyways.

First off, welcome to Wrong Planet.

Your first step in surviving away from home is to be on good terms with the people you are going to interact with. If you are just generally kind and respectful then you should be good. People can forgive odd body language if your otherwise friendly and helpful. As far as dealing with a room mate. While it may sound overly formal, you should sit down with him and discuss how he would like to handle different situations. Come to an agreement that works for both of you, and remember that compromise is a part of life.

For example, whats the plans for dinner. Do you have a cafeteria to eat at, or will you be making food at your dorm room? If your making dinner in the dorms, who makes dinner? Do you each make your own, do you take turns, etc.? Likewise, will you share dishes, or each use your own? Who will clean the dishes?

You could also discuss what to do about cleaning the dorm. Does he clean half, and you clean the other half, or do you take turns? How often should you clean? What is an acceptable standard of cleanliness?

Other topics to discuss, are when to be quiet, and how quiet should you be. If your trying to study/sleep, and your room mate is playing guitar hero, that isnt good. Perhaps you should set up a time, like after 10 pm (or whenever one of you usually falls asleep), there will be no loud noises. Likewise, no loud noises early in the morning. Keep in mind that you can go to the library during the day if you want to study quietly.

Overall, the best thing you can do with a roommate is to not get too personally involved. Hanging out with him is fine, but dont get into his personal business and tell him how to do things that dont affect you. For example, if he is struggling with a class, offer some help, but dont pester him about doing his homework or studying. Just treat him with the same respect you would like from him. Remember, your both grown men, you can discuss these things and come to a fair agreement.

Also, while I dont know your situation, you may not need a full year to adjust. If you go for a semester without any problems, try going to college in the winter term. I myself didnt find out I had AS until I had 1 semester of college left, yet I still did fine in college. Just because you have an odd style of thinking doesnt mean that you have to limit yourself. Remember that you shouldn't push yourself beyond what you can handle, but being overly cautious can take more time then needed.