Boss won't tell me why he fired me.

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I am currently going through the worst career-related experience of my life. Last August I started a job, the first position I ever held in a new career. It was going really well, except that I was very frustrated with my one co-worker. The co-worker expected me to do things exactly the way that she did them. I did my best to "go along to get along" but we ended up having a conflict about every week.

Approximately 6 weeks into the job, I went to our mutual boss and told him about my difficulty. He told me I should be doing things the way she wanted them but that he valued me as an employee. After that I tried harder to do things the way the co-worker wanted, but the co-worker became more and more controlling. For example, she would tell me to do things one way and then have me check over her work. When I found instances of her doing things the way she told me not to do them, she got extremely angry. (Even though she had asked me to check her work!). It was impossible for me to know when she meant something or didn't mean it.

Three months into the job, my coworker had made major changes to something I wrote without telling me (and left my name on the assignment as well). In order to avoid an angry conflict, I wrote my co-worker an email. In it I told her I was very upset with her and asked if we could sit down and work out our differences. Two hours after sending the email, I was fired.

My boss, who had never reprimanded me up until that point, told me to resign or else I would be fired. I was so shocked I didn't think to ask him why. A week later I got the nerve to call him and ask him about it but the secretary told me that he refused to speak with me.

A few weeks later I had to apply for a license in which I had to list every single position I had held for the prior decade. I listed my last position and said that I resigned, but the licensing board wouldn't accept that, they demanded I tell them why I resigned. I told the story as best as I could and, before sending it to them sent a copy to the old boss (i figured they would contact him). The old boss did respond. He said that he didn't agree with my characterization of the situation but that he wouldn't be talking to the licensing board so I should go ahead and send it. Now I don't know if perhaps my entire description of what went on was wrong. Also, I still don't have my license.

Since then, I have been leaving that job off my resume. It is only a bad experience so it's better if it's not out there. The problem is that some jobs require that I list all of my past positions and I don't know what to do about it. I recently applied to a whole bunch of jobs with a government office. I put the job in the resume and then explained in my cover letter that I didn't know what I did wrong but that I wasn't given the opportunity to correct it. Would you believe I was actually contacted by someone from that government office telling me that they wouldn't interview me because I mentioned the job in my cover letter? Apparently I should have listed the job in the resume but not discussed it in the cover letter? The job I was fired from is by definition a year long assignment, so the fact that I was only there for three months should be a red flag in and of itself.

The other awful thing is that I have become persona nongrata within my field. I have never been without full time employment for more than a month-- it's now been five months since I've worked full time. I graduated summa cum laude but this former boss has a lot of pull in the field and it's like he's blackballing me. This is all so strange to me because the field is actually quite competitive and lots of people seem not to get along with each other but do quite well.

The other day I spoke to a former professor of mine who I have been open with in the past (except about my aspergers). He told me that the former boss is standing in the way of my future career. Since no one hires anyone without contacting your most recent employer, the fact that this guy is refusing to talk to anyone means that anyone who is considering hiring me will think the worst. This prof wanted me to try contacting him again and ask him to "please, please be honest"-- because otherwise people will think that I got into a fist fight in the office or something even worse.

I guess I don't really have a question but I can't believe how bad this situation is. And it's simply not looking better. When I met with the prof I very intentionally said to him "I have a hard time reading social situations and figuring out what is expected from me in social situations." His only response was "You'll get better at it."

Get a lawyer or legal aid. I don't know which country you're in, but I wouldn't be surprised if a lawyer tells you that firing without reason isn't legal

I agree with the other poster that you should seek legal counsel. It seems that's the only way to find a resolution to this situation since your former boss is being uncooperative.

I also agree with the other posts, if your a member of a trade union (if you have them) this is another way to flag up employment discrimination.

Welllll - being educated isn't always a good thing.
If everyone had a college education, who would pick up my garbage?
The bottom line is - this boss is mad at you because you complained and disrupted his routine and it was easier to get rid of the one trouble maker - you then to discipline the person who was causing the trouble because they had tenor.
Take this as a learning experience and learn from it.
If things smells like a skunk and looks like a skunk - they are probably a skunk.
I have a 3 and you are done rule.
I put up with a little BS - but after 3 months - if the employer does not meet my expectations - I walk out the door and find another source of employment.
I have had 65 jobs in my life and each one might have fired me or got me so mad I quit - but each job taught me something.
I learned not to believe what most people tells you - because it is usually lies - used to protect themselves.
Not to trust the people you work with - because they are your co workers and not your friends - they are paid to be there.
They are not there because they like you - they are there because it is how they get their money and some will actually try to make the best out of even the worst situations.
I also learned that most people in my profession has either been alcoholics or drug addicts at one time and that they will lie, cheat, steal and do what ever it takes to put one extra dollar in their pocket a week - even if it means cheating you out of it or stealing it off your person or borrowing money to things and then not returning them.

The best thing you can do is get over this one obstacle and move on with your life.
If you get the license - great.
If you don't - call EDGAR SNYDER and sue!
EDGAR SNYDER = where we can get money for you!

I'm pretty sure it's illegal to be fired without being told why

Incorrect. As long as a discriminatory reason is not given, you can be let go in most States for anything they can think of... and you will have zero recourse.

What PolarHound said. Most jobs operate as "at will" employers, which means they can fire someone at any time for any reason.
It also means employees have the freedom to quit for any reason at any time.

Very few exceptions to this, most of them involving a collective-bargaining environment where they adhere to an employment contract.

Most employers will not officially say why someone was fired to avoid the possibility of legal issues, no matter how remote. My last job they did give me a termination letter that outlined why I received the evaluation I did, but did not spell out why exactly I was being terminated.

Now what *might* be looking into would be the boss holding up your licensing and future employment, and for that I do agree you should probably seek legal counsel.

You were fired because you complained. Now since you were there less than 3 months your employer could let you go for any reason, at any time, and is not required to tell you why you're being fired.

As far as your former employer stone walling you and hampering your chances of getting another job, I would seek legal council but I am not too sure if there is anything you can do.

Sorry for not checking up on my post until now.

Thanks for the support. Unfortunately I'm certain that there was nothing illegal about him firing me. On the positive side, he has not held up the licensing process for me (a few days ago I found out that I passed the last major hurdle in the licensing process-- it should be final by the end of may). Back on the negative side, he's definitely making it hard for me to get a job.

What do you all think about neglecting to mention that job to potential future employers? Do you think people will get upset if they find out later? Will they ever find out? The former boss is fairly prominent within the field, but given that he asked me to resign, I don't think he's going to go around badmouthing me. I'm more worried about people finding out after they hire me that I was forced out of a prior position and feeling that I wrongfully withheld information. If they search through my materials closely they will definitely be able to find out about the job.

I don't know which industry you are in, but if you are not explicitly required to write all your prior positions on, then I would leave it out so they don't call this problematic former boss. It is a good thing that you at least know for sure that he is stone walling you, because your professor told you so - so you know what the problem is.

I think the general advice for resumes is to only write positions on that are directly relevant and beneficial to the position you apply for. I have heard contrasting opinions about whether it is a problem to have 'holes' in the resume, but otherwise you can be vague with the dates - e.g. just write year on. You can also play with resume formats that dodge the dates such as a 'functional resume' where jobs are listed after relevance instead of chronologically.

It was a very bad idea to try to mention the unlucky firing in the cover letter. Any cover letter should focus solely on what you can do for your new employer. The purpose of the cover letter is to highlight those of your strengths that are relevant to them, so they pick you for an interview. An explanation about why a prior job went wrong has no value to them and flags you as a problem person to them.

I was just fired a couple weeks ago from what I thought would be an ideal job. The reason I was "asked to resign" was "my skills and performance are not meeting the standard necessary" It was an accounting associate position, I have a B.S. in Accounting. If I was given proper training, and wasn't expected to read my supervisors mind, I could have easily done the job "in auto-pilot." The state I live in is Washington State, which is an "at will" state, which basically means, employment can be ended by either party at any time. During two meetings with my supervisor, she indicated to me "I don't want another xxx situation (xxx was the name of a person who held my job before me for 10 years)... When I didn't understand what she was getting at, she explained that xxx did things and didn't tell her what she was doing, how she was doing it, or why... I didn't think this was an appropriate thing to say...

But bottom line, if you live in a state or country that considers employment at will... they do not need to provide a reason for terminating the employment relationship.

I have found that gaps in your resume do set a red flag on the recruiters radar. But in a situation that you have a hostile former boss, I would check with the HR department of the former company to see if he may be violating company policies. I had a boss that gave me a bad appraisal for a job, and I checked with the HR department at the former company, and it was against company policy for a former manager to give out any information beyond verifying the period I worked for him. After I contacted the former employer, I never received another negative comment back from the former manager.

^ This is exactly what you should do. You need to contact HR, tell them up front that you have Asperger's or are Autistic or however you identify. Then explain what has been happening and tell them that you just want to know A) why you were let go and B) what exactly potential employers are being told when they call the company to ask about you. Then you can put a human resources contact (the director of HR probably) down as your reference for the company and not the problem supervisor. HR will probably only say yes he worked here and yes he was let go. Who the hell knows what this jerk supervisor has been saying.

You should NEVER mention negative information of any sort on your cover letter. You can put down the job if you need to, and then when it's time for the interview or for your references to be checked you can explain that there was "an environment at the organization that you were not expecting, but attempted to tolerate." If you're pressed you can say that you thought it was a great company, you enjoyed your job and "it's too bad it didn't work out."

In the future, when someone appears to be bullying you at work, that is when you need to tell HR and your boss that you are on the autism spectrum and that social situations are hard for you to read so you would appreciate written feedback or whatever accommodations you feel you need. You may need to provide a doctor's letter or something saying you are on the autism spectrum, but probably not. After you have disclosed your "disability", you CANNOT be fired for misreading social situations and MUST be given reasonable accommodations.

***My qualifications for what I just said: I am a sociologist researching autism, I was a former manager of a department in an IT company, I have a neurological disorder so I have to deal with my own ADA accommodations, AND I was sexually harassed twice in my working career, which I think is similar to social harassment.***

BTW- It's a matter of opinion who misread this social situation. It's safe for you to say it was YOU who didn't understand, but it sounds like this co-worker and your boss didn't try to see your point of view, so THEY are the ones who misread the situation.

I'll tell you why you got fired, it seems pretty obvious to me: You followed instructions, but asked too many questions. Typical aspie issue. We tend to obsess over protocol and doing things the logical and consistant way and pointing to others when they don't do it right. But at the end of the day you don't get paid to give your opinion or make work harder for others, you get paid for "assisting" the company or another employee in doing the work they want you to do. That means just doing the work, giving managers and coworkers some room for imperfections and not asking too many questions. It's that simple. Sometimes you have to choose making money and keeping a job over what's righteous and factual. just the way NT's work.

Don't go to HR. companies don't like whistle blowers and the word will get around. You won't be able to get any references from that company, and the last place you worked is the most important references employers look at.

You sound like a hard worker and a good dude, you'll be ok and find another job quick. just relax a little and don't be afraid to NT it up in an interview. You could use this time to explore some of the NT world a little. go to block meetings or local city hall meetings and listen and watch people speak and get a feeling for it. new experiences are a good way to keep your mind active while you're not working

This is strange. I remember telling the boss that I have a mild form of autism called aspergers. One day he told me in my face that perhaps my project manger should replace me and find someone else who doesn't have aspergers. I work for the Fed Gov so my project manager is actually my boss. The Fed Gov boss is the man who said that about my aspergers. But I just found out few days ago that this ignorant bastard wrote up a good thing about me and now I have this Certificate of Commendation Award. I have no clue how he would give that to me after being ignorant towards me due to my aspergers. I nearly got a lawyer. I say when someone wants to get rid of you based on a disability, then you should pursue legal action.