To tell or not to tell

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I'm in a situation at my current place of employment where I feel like I am being taken advantage of by an individual who I work with. It's not a co-worker, it's actually a client of mine. I didn't even realize that she was taking advantage of me and being manipulative. She basically put words in my mouth in order to get her way. Now, I have been called to a meeting with my supervisor and the situation is not my fault. My supervisor does not know that I have Aspergers and I don't really want to tell her. However, I feel like she would understand my situation better if I did tell her but then I run the risk of being labeled or stigmatized by her or my coworkers if they found out. If she knew I have trouble understanding people's emotions/intentions I think she would understand though. I'm not sure what to do. Has anyone else ever been in a similar situation?

Don't tell them, they won't really understand - nobody does.

Just say you were trying to keep the client happy, but things got out of hand.

Apologise and say that it won't happen in future, and will make up any loss by working extra hours if need be.

Sorry, meant to pm only, which I did now.
So wish this forum had a delete button...

I don't really see a need to tell.

Just present your facts and version of the story objectively but with vigor.

I would recommend yes and no.

No--don't tell your supervisor you have Asperger Syndrome because it takes a LOT of time to learn what it does and doesn't mean.

Yes--tell your supervisor your good sides and downsides. e.g., good--you take on what your client tells you and champion for them, and your ____ skills are above average (?maybe your technical skills?). bad side--you have never been good at reading people who are trying to take advantage of a situation. that is, you generally take people at face value--always have and likely always will.

With this honesty about select traits of yours, now your boss can help problem solve. He/she will understand how you/they got into the situation, and that reprimanding you or sending you to a people skills class might not be the solution. If you have regular client work, you both may need to assess how to deal with such situations. Is this the right position for you? Is there a way for you to recognize potential issues sooner and ask for confidential help since your boss understands your weakness in reading people?

Everyone makes mistakes. The smart ones figure out how to learn from their mistakes and SHOW their boss that they can learn from their mistakes.

good luck.

When I interviewed people this was one of the questions I asked: "Tell me about a time you made a mistake and how you learned from it." You wouldn't believe how many people fell for that trap and said "I can't think of any"

Needless to say, they did not get hired.