I don't really want to work
InterLunar
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 25 Dec 2010
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 54
Location: Seattle, WA
Just tonight I resigned from my job... however anxious I am about the repercussions of this decision, overall I'm quite happy I finally took the step for myself.
I'm 18 now and I've been working non-stop since the age of 16. The second I could have a job, I had one, mostly because of poor household finances.
Every job I've worked I've seemed to encounter the same problem.. The "me" that my employers saw turns into the aspie, weird "me" that I actually am and they eventually regret hiring me. I mean, there are details I'm obviously leaving out to spare you from a novel of a reply, but, still. The story is always the same. I always end up eventually getting singled out by my co-workers and bosses.
This time around though, I finally quit for myself. Not because I finally found another job, or because of relocation. Just because I'm better than that. It's very empowering! I'm taking the time to better myself and find something where my personality and skill can shine. I absolutely loathe being in that awkward situation where no one listens to you, because they think your opinions are weird, or crazy. And not being respected, that's the worst. That's nowhere anyone deserves to have to be, just for a paycheck.
So, other Aspies deal with this, too, huh? Not that I'm glad it's happening to us, but I'm relieved that it's not just me being completely incapable of existing in NT society.
Hopefully I'll find something soon where I can be excited to go to work and do really enthralling activities that capture my curiosity and attention. I'm excited!
I don't think any Aspie (or NT, for that matter) should endure any negative or less-than-ideal work environment. Our lives are too short to waste them like that, and hey, I'm just gonna put it out there... we could be contributing a lot more than just manual labor into society!
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If I go on disability, I will have to say goodbye to all my dreams. I might not have a choice in the matter, eventually since I'm losing eyesight. Why can't I spend my life doing something I hate to my core? Am I going to regret living this way later? I want to fight as long as I can. I know I'd regret giving up.
To be short, I don't have any answers right now. No one in my life cares about me enough to show any concern so I'm trying to find my way.
I'm afraid you are right, because it is the way of the world although when I'm in between jobs, I have times I feel the same way as Joe90. I know quite a few people on SS disability and believe me, it is not much of a life. One lady I know is barely getting by and her car is in bad shape, sometimes she asks me advice on it (I worked in auto parts). If I hit the lottery, I'd do the same thing as Joe90, sit back for a while and figure out what to do with the other half of my life. Myself, I'd like to work more into electronics, being an amateur radio operator and maybe learn how to restore old cars. I'd probably work but something I'd like to do and on my terms, maybe work with my cousin, who I think has AS or AS traits as well. Backing up, I think before that, I'd buy a 1960's/1970's era land yacht car and a bullet trailer and bum around the U.S. for a while.
I think that while the world of work is not perfect, it is far better to work then not to work. Going to work does give you many advantages, it puts money in your wallet and it does provide some order to your life.
You're right, it sure beats homelessness and starvation.
This is true.
Sorry for being a bit OT, but that's a huge problem too, especially when our manufacturing goes away and automation take over. This is one question that society will have to answer somehow, but IMHO, I find the standard answers from both the left and right to be seriously lacking.
Well I am not working, but I do own a business absentee -- 3 FedEx Home Delivery Routes in NYC.. After expenses I can net between $1000 - $1500 a week and much more during the christmas holiday period.. I am still unemployed and worse is that I am stuck in this malaise of no motivation even to look for a job or send out Resumes. I am also getting around $500 a week in uenmployment benefit as well.
I am not held a perm full time job since 2009 and have had scattered periods of short & long term unemployment and temp work since then. My longest temp job was last year 2012 from Jan - Aug. After that the agency got me another job in September but it was in Cranston Rhode Island with a 68 mile commute by car each way for $5.00 Less per hour than I got on the previous job. I was also running this business and had to deal with mechanical issues on trucks, getting them serviced, renting vehicles plus I still went to the gym for 1-2 hours each day. I was in a perpetual state of hysteria -- drinking energy drinks & taking extra Adderalls to get thru it. Well I got fired a month later because apparently they didn't think I had experience for the role. Since then I worked temp for 2 weeks in February and then got let go because according to the supervisor they were going to use in house resources for the project.
Now, I hardly have any motivation.. I need to look for work and need a job because I cannot cover personal expenses even netiting $1500 a week. Everyone wants exact experience in a specific industry for a specific time period working with a specific software package.
I'm never going to work. I don't have any experience, education, or transportation except for walking or the bus because I don't drive. I don't like people and am not good at socializing or being around them a lot. Having to leave the house every day is stressful for me and eventually I have to stop doing it. I even had that problem back when I was in school bad enough that I had to go to family court multiple times for truancy and got sent away twice.
At times I've thought about applying for a job but I can't even think of any place I could apply where I could get and do the job. I now also have to worry that if I got a job that it wouldn't give me insurance or if it did it would have large copays that I can't afford and that I'd lose my Medicaid. I've been to the doctor a lot lately. Without Medicaid or insurance I couldn't go.
I'm supported by my mother and can only hope that when she is gone she'll be able to leave me enough money to keep me going for a while.
I hated school - it was boring and I was bullied terribly and I left as soon as possible. I couldn't stand having to get up at an unnatural hour to be somewhere I didn't want to be, doing things I didn't want to do and with people I didn't want to be with.
Work is just the same.
Yes, you can argue that the difference is that it pays, but what good is that when it doesn't allow enough time to do the things that I want the pay FOR? Not that the pay is ever going to be enough to fund my science research anyway.
I'm widely and deeply read in areas that interest me, but because I don't have, can't afford and have no time to study for degrees, guess what - no one cares what I can do and how much I know.
After work, I'm too tired and frazzled to work on any of my projects and special interests, and what with a sick boyfriend to look after and a home to run, you can imagine how much time I get to do anything for myself at all.
I'm sure my scientific research, or my music, or my writings could potentially be of much more benefit to humanity in the long run than my working a day job ever could be. But big business and their politician friends have got it sewn up so that if you don't spend your life doing something that generates instant income you don't eat and it's as simple as that.
Unfortunately if I give up work not only can I not support myself and my partner but I stand no chance of affording the type of equipment I need for my science projects. If I work I have virtually no time for them anyway. What kind of a sick life is this?
I work part-time.
For 3 years i was at home. Not going out anywhere. Not interacting...nothing.
But that was a bad period. I got up early morning, did household work and went back to sleep till midday.
I developed thyroids and other illness.
Then after gathering lot of courage i went searching for a part time job.
Its a teaching job and i have to teach underprivileged children. i like the job but i cant handle the politics and colleagues
My juniors are useless and they create loads of problems for me.
I avoid going to the office and prefer being in the school. Whenever i go to office I am ignored and end up eating tiffin alone
and sitting alone.
Also i avoid office outings, picnic, gatherings and also overnight trips.
But the job provides a creative outlet, i like making teaching aids
the only problem is the socialising part.
And if i sit at home doing nothing then i start worrying, i worry about tomorrow, what will happen with my child,
what if my hubby loses his job, what if we dont save for future.
All such worries make me depressed also i think a lot about past about all the things my parents did with me,
the rude words my relatives used, being bullied by colleagues and classmates.
Everything just takes me towards suicide.
I think part time job is good enough
_________________
The only thing right in this wrong world is
WRONG PLANET
TL;DR: Life sucks...but it doesn't have to forever. Do something to change it, and it will change! I promise, because it has for me.
I feel occupational frustration, for sure.
I was a Skilled Gardener at a military golf course, making decent money. It was "a great opportunity" that I had worked hard for! I even gave up a Cost of Living Allowance from my similarly titled, preceding job, and added 2 hours to my commute. That "opportunity" was a string of trivial dick-waving by my colleagues, lasting for about 12 months before a profoundly entitled co-worker threatened to kill me, at work, in front of a supervisor. Guess who kept his job on the Greens?
I was transferred to a custodial position, with "potential for growth when another position becomes available." Seeing as how I'm still paying off student loans for the A.A.S. in Horticulture I earned, I was not happy to be the only qualified candidate for the Greens job, yet thrown into the dumpster for someone else to deal with because of a less-qualified person's out-of-control anger issues.
I'm making the most of it, though. I HATE HATE HATE scrubbing toilets, but it has taught me humility. It led me to seek out a diagnosis, when I recognized symptoms on my own. It has made me prioritize the things that I find important in life. It has forced me to deal with my social ineptitude and to communicate more effectively. I am doing things that make me HAPPY when I'm not at work in order to offset the BS from work, and it's WORKING! I'm using my Autie-strengths to my advantage to minimize the weaknesses.
Auties are pushed around a LOT, to say the least. Here's the thing, though: we don't have to be!
Concentrate on your strengths, because that draws the attention of others TO THOSE STRENGTHS. You'll become more confident, which will allow you to step out, if even just a tiny bit, of your comfort zones, thereby expanding them, allowing further expansion. Personal growth is not something that just happens, unlike that beard that grows because you never shave to leave the house. It takes WORK, but it can happen for anyone.
I hear a lof of "I don't have social skills," or "I get overwhelmed," or "I don't qualify." These statements concentrate on a problem. Stating the problem does nothing to RESOLVE it. You don't have social skills? Challenge yourself to find something that you genuinely like about every person, letting that thing make you smile genuinely. Experiment with small talk, because it's for talking to ANYONE. You get overwhelmed? List things that calm you down and find a way to INTEGRATE them into your daily life, and especially in stressful situations. You don't qualify? List goals, even if for a retail job, then come up with a plan of action to attain skills for that job.
Just don't be surprised that nothing changes when you do nothing about it.
I didn't like living at home. I moved out.
I didn't like paying my boyfriend's bills and putting up with his emotional BS. I broke up with him and went to school.
I didn't want to pay out the ass in student loans. I applied for and WON scholarships to take the financial edge off.
I didn't like working at McDonald's when I was laid off from my educated profession. I worked my ass off for 2 months at 3 jobs to save money, bought a plane ticket to Germany and jetted out.
I'm still in Germany, in a MUCH better place than when I got here. That didn't happen because I sat around. Well, I did sit around, but it ultimately led to me acting against a frustrating situation to make it BETTER.
Now, I'm using my obsession with linguistics to develop an American expat-specific "Fundamentals of German" course to make extra money, doing something I ENJOY, to offset the nonsense I get from my two-faced boss, and her cutting my hours for calling her out on her BS. I've also applied for several other jobs, which I may or may not get, but it takes EFFORT to allow possibility to become reality. I still HATE dealing with people and their useless idiosyncrasies as much, if not more, as always, but I'm not letting them get the best of my desires.
Make your strengths speak for you, and your weaknesses will become inaudible.
A mass of small positives can quickly overpower a few negatives.
stuff working somewhere you don't want to be I feel like a slave on earth most days..
I wish we were all still out hunting in the wild for stuff instead of some fake being in power selling us everything and making it "convenient" as they say it's not really convenient someone just stole everything and sold it back to us.
This is exactly why I decided to go into the adult industry, exotic dancing so far, because it doesn't feel like work. I plan on moving to California to do film after a few procedures this year... The clients treat me like royalty, usually, and if they don't ahem there's bodyguards to take them out. I put all my focus on my looks, which makes me feel like I'm normal. I will do this until I'm 40. I hope to retire sooner though, since all I need is 10K of savings per yr (so if I make 50k a yr doing this, I will be able to retire by 30.... not that I will retire though) I keep up with the only thing I can manage which is myself; my weight, my health, my skin condition... I can't manage much more than that!
I will gladly marry any old man I can find.
or consider any normal man who can take care of me too.
It is what it is.
Working part time seems to suit me best. It gives me a little more of a social outlet, and more structure to my day. I can handle full time if I need to, but I have to be able to slip in time away on a regular basis just to reboot. I was a stay at home mom for two years, and ended up just about climbing the walls out of boredom.
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