terminally unemployed

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This isn't a terrible idea. I used to work for a company that hired a lot of people from India. Many of the Indian workers lied to us about their work experience. We didn't verify international work experience. I don't think anyone does. We always verified local experience.

Off-topic - I very recently moved back to my home town Dronfield after having lived in a variety of other towns and cities since I left home at 16. Your signature just reminded me that the Peak District is right on my doorstep. I almost feel guilty for not making the most of it these last couple of months!

My brother's company is full of Indians who lie about their backgrounds. Not to stereotype but it seems to be a cultural thing and restricted only to India. Some have even gotten hired as Engineers for example when they have the equivalent of a Diploma Mill certificate and would fail a College entrance exam! My brother is probably the most liberal, open minded person on Earth and he tells me all the time he wants to deport all Indians from his city. Some can barely speak English and still get $100,000/year jobs!

I'm starting to wonder the same thing. I got fired from the one good job I had 6 months ago, and I haven't been able to find a new (permanent) job since. Apparently I can't pass an interview for s**t even though I've practiced over and over. When's the point where I should tell myself to give up? It's hard to say.

Dear Pinapplehead,
Last night my wife and stepson admitted to me that I do not look into peoples eyes when speaking to them.

I mean I knew that I did that, but I thought that it was't that bad or that my brief looks into their faces was normal enough, but apparently this is the most glaring problem which sends a message to other people.

I am a bit upset about this because for one thing I have always had a lazy eye so I made the excuse that this was why I did not look at people because they always commented on where I was looking. Second, just because I don't totally stare into people's eyes doesn't mean that I don't hear them or connect with them. But I am realizing now that most of society needs to "feel" some sort of "mutual" "connection" by the use of certain lenths of eye contact.

I am a bit upset as I know my sense of decernment regarding others feelings is off the chart and other people may not even realize feelings that I know they are dealing with, but they are sitting there second guessing themselves in reagrd to my "normalness" and if I am "connecting" to them because I am not giving them a "normal" facial experience.

This makes me even more upset that this has been what has hindered me in job interviews. Why are people so shallow?

Well, I am still seeing a psychologist to verify if I am on the autistic spectrum, but now it is beginning to feel like a waiting game and I know what the answer will be.

My advice to all of us is to for us all to beginning learning about eye contact and trying to understand how it signals the rest of society. I thought I was giving enough eye contact, but instead I am now realizing that I was just briefly staring towards thier faces and the majority of my talking was stairing away while speaking.

I have never felt comfortable staring directory into peoples eyes while speaking because for me it is just too intimate. Especially with women. I always felt that it was inappropriate for a man to look into a woman's eye's while talking for long periods.

Somewhere between youth and adulthood I never made the crossover to understand a difference between "normal" eye contact and "intimate" eye contact. For me it's all raw and I can't take the raw uncomfortable feelings. Plus I feel like if I look into people's eyes that I will be looking upon their uncovered secret lives and they will see that I know their feelings. Actually I already feel that I know what most people feel, but I feel it is more polite not to allow them to know that I do by staring into their eyes. Like I am trying to be a gentleman and be descreat about embarrassing situations.

This makes sense because when I fell love with my wife I did look into to her eyes in those early days because I must have felt that this was an appropriate use of eye contact, but after 22 years of marriage I have reverted and my wife admitted last night that I don't give her sufficient enough eye contact. This broke my heart a bit more as my feelings for her have only grown over the years.

So my new obsessive hobby is going to be studying the art of eye contact. Watch out world you have meesed with the wrong aspie!

Would definitely like to go further down the freelance route. I've done that type of work already (and already on the tax system so need to do self assessments every year now anyway) but it's often hard to gauge the trustworthiness of a client you know nothing about before entering a contract. I've done that before and it's been problematic to get out of contracts that turn out to be not what you expected so I tend to apply for far fewer projects now. This means it has never been a primary source of income but in an ideal.world I'd be able to earn enough to be self sufficient for a change.

Sadly, I haven't even had much of a chance for that to affect me in interviews. Most of the jobs I've been applying for are out of state, so it's phone interviews and I've never made it past that point. However, I have not had a single job unless the interview process was either A) nonexistent or B) a formality.

Why "resign yourself" to anything? Stop being so negative before I cage you you silly girl. Try a word switch at least. Instead of "resigned to never get one", try "not cut out for the Employment Club". I mean, really! Are lesbians "resigned" to not having a happy hetero marriage? Did my blind uncle "resign" to not being able to see? Not everyone is cut out for competitive employment. Whether you are or aren't, understand that not being a member of the E.C. does not make you garbage.



Like what you like and share it with others. Don't do this to impress employers. Example... Python absolutely rocks as a programming language. Is there some prospective employer possibly reading this post looking for Python developers? Unlikely, and quite frankly, I couldn't care less. So what are the things YOU like so much that you couldn't NOT share it with others? Volunteer in that. Get a degree in that. Whatever. Just do that.

Temp to Hire jobs actually help. Doing TTH jobs keep you in a couple dollars, but you could gain experience and use that towards future jobs. Used to do janitorial work which I was getting fed up with and also felt the horrible feelings of unemployment, but been doing temp work, and actually like the current job I'm doing.