Trying to deal with that other ADA person at the job

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So basically I got a job with the Government due to my involvement in Vocational Rehab. I put two and two together when I got hired that we were all ADA. One deaf girl started with us and another girl who seemed off (She has seizures).

The deaf girl is kickass and is completely fun to be around in fact she wants to get drinks soon. The other girl is different.

Now I am understanding of people and I've been more than accomdating with this person but this sezure girl is starting to push my buttons.

When we started she tried to make a demand that we all wear name tags (Thankfully that never happened.) and what she would do whenever someone had a converstation she would jump in saying, "What are you all talking about" or simply butting in to the converstation. I mean I am the one with a communication disorder so to notice she is going a little to far is worry some.

She than comes up to my office space either stares at what I am doing like a supervisor or looks at what I am doing and asking what I am doing. Also every question that normally you'd go to your supervisor she'd come to me and ask me.

Other people are fed up with her but I get it the worst because I sit right behind her. I can't have anyone come to my office because she buts into whatever is going on. One person almost snapped on her and we have other departments coming up to us asking, "What is wrong with her" meaning everyone is sick of her s**t.



The worst part, is the e-mails I get. Let's say I am at the deaf workers cubical chatting cause that person is an awesome human being. When I get back to my desk.....I see an e-mail like a supervisor sent saying "What were you all talking about over there?"

One e-mail was about me and a deaf co-worker. Basically she came to me was telling her chair is uncomfortable. Our supervisor told us we can grab a chair from an empty desk anytime. So I told her that and we went hunting for a good chair. When I came back I got the e-mail



"William,

I understand we have uncomfortable chairs but I'll ask this anyways. Why did you all switch chairs?"



Now I have 12 other weird e-mails from her and tuesday I got in early with her demanding my personal phone number and e-mail address and I told her I don't feel comfortable giving you that info. She then presisted but I told her no very nicely. She walks away and a co worker who over heard came up to me asking me, "Are you okay what the f**k is wrong with her."

Yesterday I get an e-mail demanding I not listen to music on my headphones. After that I was near a full autistic melt down. I've been printing up all her e-mails and talking to other coworkers but her behavior who have come to me asking about her behavior but I had enough I spoke with a supervisor and the look on her face after reading the e-mails was priceless she said she would talk to her but since we are dealing with an audit I believe that was delayed.

When I got home I get a PSN friend request with the message, "So William, what are you all talking about?" I looked and remembered I gave this guy at work my PSN and man that was a good five minute laugh....but seriously though I am pissed.

This is precisely the type of issue I dealt with at my last job (where I had to walk out), except unfortunately, it was I who was communicating improperly. Apparently this person likes you, not necessarily in a romantic way, but definitely wanting to be your friend. It sounds like she doesn't know how to go about it. (seizure girl - although that is totally not the way to refer to a person), and I over-all suggest a sit-down with a manger. Yourself, her, and probably anyone else who was involved in the chair situation. Everyone needs to know that it was her discomfort, not anyone else's, and she needs to admit that in public. It may be very hard for her, so be ready for that.
I'm good at gathering a situation quickly, but I'm sorry if I missed any details of your report here.
It's very important that nobody lose their job, or even be reprimanded, over some chairs.

Also, understand that, for her to come over to a group and blurt out: "What are you guys talking about?" She meant that sincerely, and wanted to be involved in the discussion, but probably had the wrong tone of voice. Am I guessing right?

I understand. I am high functioning like you are, and you realize this woman you describe is definitely lower functioning? It's about to be out of your hands entirely, if she gets herself fired. Don't let her drag you down with her. You've done your part, from what it sounds like. Otherwise, you're gonna have to quit your job and let her win, and then she'll do it twice as much to the next person.
So, it's one of three things:
1: tell her off completely, and watch her have a meltdown
2: ask a manager to sit down with the two of you, even if it takes more than one meeting
3: quit your job

That idiot seriously need to start collecting unemployment benefits.

Go to management and/or union rep and ask them to put a foot in her ass, that kind of behaviour is unacceptable, regardless if you are Autistic or NT you shouldn't have to put up with crap like that.

Print all email, use your phone to record conversations (burn audio files to CD), get witness statements from your coworkers.

I would try to set boundaries with her, and seek a supervisor's support on points where it's directly affecting work (not just an annoyance). Don't respond to her emails, and when she is being overbearing in your space say something like "I'm sorry, but you are distracting me from my work". Make it a simple and polite statement, and don't engage with her past that.

Good luck!

This looks like a possible case of workplace harassment. Even if it is not intended that way, this person is still behaving in an inappropriate/annoying manner. First idea might be to speak to your manager, if you feel comfortable doing that, or perhaps just making enquiries as to who in your organisation is supposed to deal with issues like this.

So today when I got in she didn't come to talk to me. Next thing you know she's behind me rubbing on my shoulders squeezing. I told her I didn't feel comfortable and she says, "I don't know what came over me"

I am in are loss for words right now....

So they had a talk with her last Friday. Monday she didn't try to talk to me. Tuesday she started back up by asking me small questions which I told her to go talk to her supervisor in which she kept insisting to talk to me.

Then when I got up and came back I realize she was watching me because when I got back I got a crazy placed on my desk in which I didn't take a picture of it but asked follow coworkers if they got any crazy letters from here in which they responded no but they have started to get emails from her now.

My manager and supervisor were told of the letter by another work since I left it on the desk.

Today she is again coming to me insisting to talk to me and then commenting I am doing something different and watching me.

I am fed up

What's with all the personality disorders? This girl just sounds like she's more autistic than the OP. She's probably just fixating and having minimal social skills. I guess the OP is giving minimal feedback, which makes her even more confused and likely to imagine things. I don't think polite hints will work - just tell her directly what your issues are. Make it about you, not about her:

"I don't like being touched", "I don't want people at work to have my contact details" - just like you said in your posts. Preferably with a manager present.

OP, is your mother autistic?

Edit: Just wanted to say that I think there is no easy fix in this situation. I don't think you can handle it all on your own, management should keep involving themselves. They might be pussyfooting around, trying to spare her feelings, and in the process managing to give mixed messages - and she doesn't seem to be a person who responds well to mixed messages.