PLEASE help me land a job for anything

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I'm approaching rock bottom as I can't stand my living situation any longer. I'll do anything to get a real job because I'm turning 25 this year and I lost the opportunities of life already. I want a girlfriend/wife and other opportunities, but I can't find it without a job.

I don't want to bother listing all the things about my current situation right now, because it will fill a whole book. I've become demotivated and lazy. I have community helpers take me out into the community, but that really sucks. How can I explain in clear language to my parents to get them to cut off my helpers without getting them all uptight. Whenever I say or advocate anything, they act all uptight and I feel like I'm not using the right words.

My location isn't that hot for opportunities either. The closest thing to a community college here is a program for those with developmental disabilities, but it only has a few courses that are boring to me.

Have you tried volunteering?

I'm in the same boat, unfortunately i've learned that in my area and might apply to others is that some people who have been long-term unemployed for at least 5 years have been really lucky to get a minimum wage job in a factory somewhere that operates machinery that pretty much does the work for them and all they do is organise and sort stock for 10 hours a day (sometimes negotiated up to 14 hours if own transport) 6 days a week. Something I can do but apparently I have to wait for 10 years and if I haven't got a job yet they'll hire me. It was considered a new thing for the area bringing jobs for those worse off financially.

I meet their criteria although i've only been unemployed for 4 years (including time in education which turned out to be pointless). And I suppose you could say I volunteered for a few months at an office job to get a feel for the environment which I wasn't too keen on, but I did get feedback that I wouldn't last a day in that job. What good is applying for a job if you know you won't do any good in it? In this respect my job search is narrowed down so much, only 50 new ones show up on the job sites every week as opposed to 10's of thousands of jobs that an NT would excel at.

Text removed. Spammer/multiple sock puppet

Depending on your workplace skills, using a temporary-employment agency can be very helpful. Some of the jobs that they can secure for you might actually end up employing you directly. It is worth a try. And, employment can start immediately.

Just to get the feeling that you're making some progress, I'd recommend signing up for Amazon's Mechanical Turk service. This is a site where you can do small online tasks and get paid a few cents at a time for a few minutes work. This is *not* a way to support yourself -- it's a way to get a few dollars every now and then for stray expenses. But it will make you fell like you're actually doing something rather than nothing, and that's important.