Started a new job & feeling bad about it

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Dennis
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26 Mar 2018, 4:17 am

I've been looking for a job forever and recently got a 3rd shift stocking job at Meijer's. I thought it might work out well but so far it isn't really. They've already been telling me I'm going too slow and should be getting 2 shelves done in the time it takes me to do less than one. Heard I'm too slow 4 times in 2 days. Really feeling anxious and depressed about this and I don't want to keep working there, but it seems tough to quit when I just finally got a job.



TimS1980
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26 Mar 2018, 6:38 am

One of my first jobs was internet helpdesk. As usual I was an odd one out.

I was lauded for customer outcomes. I was criticised for not plowing through the tickets like the other employees (who effectively disposed of tickets and only sometimes actually solved them along the way).

The boss will often make calls that seem wrong, but when his decisions are judged by folks who can make their judgement stick, often very different criteria apply.

Here's my earnest advice.
Let the bosses worry about whether you are doing it right. Accept they might want you to compromise tidyness a bit, as wrong as that may be, for a bit faster completion.

Also, remember, experienced hands have often worked out shortcuts that really do putthem ahead in terms of speed, sometimes with surprisingly few negative side effects.

Im short, try not to let it bother you that they might expect you to be faster, even if it seems wrong. Try and find acceptable ways to comply.

Here are two actions i recommend.

1) ask another worker to help you speed up, may e show you a trick or two, or even just stand back and study how they operate.

2) take your best shot at speeding things up, call in your boss and say something like "i was xx percent faster on these shelves, but do they look ok?" - at least any boss worth their salt should appreciate a show of inituative.

..or..

3) do what i did when i didn't like what i was forced to do to my own standards in the job -
-tell noone and give no sign
-takes steps, slow and steady, to land another job
-take your leave from this job and remember to smile and share only positive sentiment on your way out... because you just never know what might follow you, or if you might one day wish you could come back


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shortfatbalduglyman
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26 Mar 2018, 4:12 pm

Dennis

The previous boss had the nerve to tell me that "the women (or woman) said you were learning too slowly".

That was the third day of work

That was when she fired me

Does the boss criticize everyone equally, or just you?

If just you, maybe you should do what Tim specified

If the boss tells off other employees, then maybe that doesn't justify your anxiety and depression

"Depression" is a diagnosis. Not an emotion

If the boss fires you, then, from now on, every time a job application asks "have you ever been fired?". The correct answer is "yes"

So, it is better to quit than get fired

But quitting at every slightest problem does not make sense

Likewise, take iNto account your financial situation

Every situation is different, in ways that determine what the correct course of action is

But there is something wrong with everything



Dennis
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28 Mar 2018, 2:13 am

I had to quit. It hasn't made me feel much better, if at all, but I couldn't keep up with the depression & anxiety.



TimS1980
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28 Mar 2018, 4:23 pm

That's the final element of choice and freedom in any employment. You were totally within your rights to exercise your choice.

Here's wishing you well, I hope you're doing ok.



leahbear
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30 Mar 2018, 1:18 am

Good for you. You have to take care of your mental health. A situation at work where someone is on my case repeatedly makes me feel ashamed and that spins in my head all day. I had a bad habit of thinking I had to work full time because that's what grown ups are supposed to do. I would have increasing anxiety the longer I was at my job from sensory issues, social anxiety, communication and executive function problems. At the time before I'd read about AS I didn't know what was making me so overwhelmed so I just tried to ignore it. Horrible idea. I could only put up with the stress for so long before my body would break down on me and force me to take time off or quit. And repeat. Not a fun cycle. And for sure making my chronic endocrine/GI/autoimmune conditions worse.

You have to find a situation that works for you. I've been working from home recently and I'm much calmer and happier. I'm so lucky to have a boyfriend who is also a programmer and very supportive of me through this emotional journey of discovering autism thru my autistic burnout. He deals with the client and I can code quietly at home. Now when I get frustrated and start freaking out I can stop working and do something to calm myself down like yoga, qi gong, meditation, hot bath, watching another episode of Law and Order. Then if I can calm down I do some more work. Good luck. I'm sending some calm your way.



Chronos
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30 Mar 2018, 1:35 am

Dennis wrote:
I had to quit. It hasn't made me feel much better, if at all, but I couldn't keep up with the depression & anxiety.


That kind of job is not worth depression and anxiety. I think you made the right choice by quitting. A different store might be a nicer place to work. You may even find a better job entirely. I looked up Meijer and it appears to be similar to Walmart.



Omniel
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31 Mar 2018, 9:18 pm

Dennis wrote:
I've been looking for a job forever and recently got a 3rd shift stocking job at Meijer's. I thought it might work out well but so far it isn't really. They've already been telling me I'm going too slow and should be getting 2 shelves done in the time it takes me to do less than one. Heard I'm too slow 4 times in 2 days. Really feeling anxious and depressed about this and I don't want to keep working there, but it seems tough to quit when I just finally got a job.


Did you identify yourself as Aspie on your application so they could make accommodation? Meijer's will really ride you unless there is a reason they legally cannot. I would let HR know I'm on the autism spectrum and that they need to accommodate for that or move you to a less time-sensitive job. If you don't it's likely you'll end up fired.



Omniel
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31 Mar 2018, 9:21 pm

Dennis wrote:
I had to quit. It hasn't made me feel much better, if at all, but I couldn't keep up with the depression & anxiety.


I answered before I read this. My brother (Aspie) also had the same trouble at Meijer. He had a better time at Dollar Tree. Try there. I would still recommend that when you're filling out applications, identify yourself as having a disability if you're an Aspie if you're applying at a large chain.



KanyeWestFan
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01 Jun 2018, 3:46 am

I feel the same way and I work at a fast food place so when a rush comes in, co-workers act rude to me since I don't go fast as them