Accusations of an "attitude problem"??

Post Reply New Topic

Yep...had to deal with one of those!! Had a manager in a former job who had big-time narcissistic personality traits, and one of the most manipulative "people" I've ever had to deal with. I told her once that I found what she said to be insulting not just to me but to the Asperger community (I'd already disclosed to her, but I doubt she read up on it). She then told me that I misinterpreted her intent, it wasn't to insult it was to help me improve, and because I was like that with her, then she "has to" assume that I've been like that with everyone else, and will have to monitor me more closely from now on

I got the heck out of that place to another job as soon as I could...! !! !

I constantly am accused of having a attitude on the phone because voice on the phone. MOre often women on the phone from Texas accuse me of being "dull" "uncooperative" and "having attitude" sorry customers if consider licking your asses over the phone my pride and joy of day. I at times I have also h gotten dirty looks when I asked this one person for help twice after she had helped me with the first question. From then on I consider her to be a total b***h at heart who likes to play the quiet coy nerd at work just by talking softly and sparingly. I'm accused of mumbling when I was just talking softly in a loud restaurant. The irony is that I only develop an attitude when I am accused of having an attitude. I realized if I want people to be more charitable toward my flaws; I need to fake a speech impediment, as if I am clinically ret*d to make people feel guilty for being judgmental, only then do they start acting like decent human beings towards me.

I got in trouble for saying "what" when the boss called me. They said don't say "what" because it sounds rude and ugly but say yes ma'am or yes mr or miss whoever. So I asked "why" and they didn't like that and said I had an attitude. But THEY were the ones with an attitude (two bosses at once). So I guess they hate the word "what", just how I hate the word "bisque", ok fine. So 30 minutes later I called my boss' name to get her attention and she said "what?, I mean, huh?" lolol and then I called her on it. Then for the rest of the day she said "huh" instead (just say it in your head "HHUUHHHHHH". Sounds way better than "what" right? (sarcasm)).

But I'm going off on a tengent, how does asking "why" seem like having an attitude? These people literally told me that I shouldn't ask questions. I feel like I was accused of a thoughtcrime.

Most people are taught from childhood not to say "What?" especially not to people in a position of authority. They just assumed that you knew that saying "what" was rude (which was wrong of them) and that you were being difficult when you asked why. It's not the same as the word bisque at all. It's just a matter of manners.

Calling people out isn't polite either. Which I know isn't logical I know, but telling someone in a position of authority at work that they are being a hypocrite isn't on. I can see why they would think this is an attitude problem.

However, your supervisors response of going, "huuuh" at you is very childish of her.

I know it's difficult, but you can only control you, you are not responsible for how others behave, good manners don't make the world go round, but they certainly grease the wheel.

Thanks hurtloam. Illl add though that it came out of the blue, we said what for a year and no one had a problem with it. And never in my less then 23 years have i witnessed anyone have a problem with what.