Finding and Keeping jobs - Tips and Advice

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I won't do something that I consider unethical but would volunteer to do a different job instead to make up for it.

I posted this on another board, I thought it might come in handy here. Enjoy!

1.) Make a note of who introduces themsevles to you when you first start. I can tell you for a fact that the first seemingly super friendly coworkers who want to be the first to get to know you are also, sadly, often the first to stab you in the back and can be the meanest if you do not measure up to their often unrealistic social expectations of you.

2.) Treat everyone like they are your friend, even if you hate their guts (i.e., keep your friends close and your enemies closer).

3.) Don't trust anyone. It seems over protective, but it is a good rule of thumb. I have had people I could have sworn would keep a secret spill the beans (often in front of as many people as possible).

4.) Filter your emails. One thing about emails is that they are basically written in stone, they can be sent to anyone. So when sending a email, be as non-offensive and as bland as possible. I even sent a personal email to someone who didn't work at my company complaining about my boss. Somehow, the boss was able to obtain a copy.

5.) Try to avoid office conversations. With aspies (myself included) we are not experts at social interaction in the office. I have found that being polite and terminating a conversation as soon as possible has saved me a number of times. Basically, just pretend you are listing to what they are saying, look like your interested and then say something like "Can I go for a quick second. My lunch is in the microwave". Saying quick second is great because they take it as your going to come back (they are so interested in their own words they won't notice if you return or not), so you can use it as an easy exit.

6.) Be an actor. The non-aspie person prides themselves on how shallow they can be (i.e., why do you think Paris Hilton is a role model for so many of them). It really works, I tend to be really outgoing at work because I put myself in the mental role of "people person". In fact, most people at work I really don't like, but they think I like them.

You are soooo right about each and every one of your points here.

I wish you'd told me all this 20 years ago. My life would've been completely different, not the hell it's been at work and socially.

It got so bad with me being let go I eventually just quit asking why.

My b est work experience was still tough. I wouldn't have lasted as long were it not that I got along so well with our customers, some of whom I still keep in touch with. My co workers, nothing.

I had a problem with the team player thing. Then I thought of Star Trek. Everybody there is a specialist, but has some general knowledge. It's important to know just where you fit in.
Also acknowledge your speciality, what you're best at.

You know what Dr McKoy would say if his boss would ask him to do something complicated outside medicine . . . .

Hi all,

Thanks for all the advice, I find some very useful, hoping I will be able to apply them to my current job.

xcuse me, thx1138, i also like paris a little bit. her clip "stars are blind" looks good and the tune is really catchy. in addition, she was like a modern princess, born with a silver spoon in her mouth. don't you love fairy tales?!?! LOL

cheers,

I feel really bad admitting that have been unemployed for most of my life now 37yr that equates to 2 jobs in 19yrs total time in both jobs 2 yrs = 17yrs of unemployment.
My main problem was being scared to interact with the rest of the world, just hid myself away indoors being mostly mute.
The ideal of having to go to a job interview made me sick Ive recieved no help from anyone not even my family, all I wanted to do was die also the kind of jobs that I could get would make me even more depressed my last job almost killed me.
I feel such a waste of space an a tax burden to the people that can work, but since joining this site an seeing my shrink Im hoping to turn my life around an actually live it.

Thanks for the all info here will try to make good use of it an get a darn job.

I've gotten a certain amount of success by always being pleasant and polite, and always maintaining a cheerful facade (even if I have to fake it). Where I work now, I have a rep for being the quiet type, but also for being the type of person who can always be asked to help out when it's needed. I'm well-liked in the department I work in... which I still find a little creepy because I'm not used to that.

This seems like reasonable advice (mind you, I'm very bad at pretending all is okay when it isn't).

Over the years, I have collected some free material about job interviews. Although this material often had some good information, it many ways it was too general/ vague. Recently I purchased the e-book "How to Impress For Success at Job Interviews"
http://www.interviewsolution.com/
I have been pleasantly surprised by it. The thing I like the most is the writer not only lists common interview questions, but often gives suggestions or tips for how to respond to those questions. In some instances, his suggestions are general, but useful; e.g.,
Q: Why do you want this job?
A: Think carefully about this question. Stress the positive aspects that have attracted you to apply for this position. Do not mention the negative aspects of your current job or the job in question.
In others they are very specific; e.g.,
Q: Why should we hire you?
A: You should always answer "Because of my knowledge, experience, abilities and skills."

(Before anyone asks, I am *not* receiving any sort of financial compensation for mentioning this e-book. I am simply trying to be helpful.)

One caveat is that this book may be overkill for the type of jobs I am looking at. Higher paying jobs require greater interpersonal skills, and thus have more rigorous interview processes. As much as I would like to earn a lot of money, realistically I would be ill suited for such work.

Another issue is there are a lot of possible questions, and trying to prepare and memorise answers to all of them is far beyond most people's capabilities (or at least beyond mine). The author helpfully groups questions into several categories. An interesting suggestion I read elsewhere is to think of things in terms of 'talking points'.
“Don’t try to prepare for every possible question that could arise. Determine the 6-8 topics that are likely to come up during your interview and then:
a. Hone a key message for each topic.
b. Identify anecdotes you can tell that illustrate each message.
c. Prepare specific examples or compelling data to prove your point.
d. Think of clever analogies if appropriate.
Think of these interviews as the equivalent of a good movie trailer, in which your quest is to independently drive to the very best scenes, anecdotes and newsworthy revelations in the book.”
- http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/04/3 ... s-from-me/
See also http://finance.yahoo.com/expert/article/careerist/52808

Finally, one general interviewing tip: Always keep your answers positive.

I would like to keep this forum going - this forum has GREAT tips for the whole gamut of finding a job/keeping a job.

Thank you everyone here!

I have read thousands of posts on WP... Many of the very gifted people here have said that they could not finish their education and they are doing hard jobs, like cashiers etc. but they still think about their dreams. I want to encourage everyone here not to let our "disability" (no matter how much self confidence I have, I know my AS is a disability for me, so don't get offended that I said "disability", that's only my feeling about myself, but I am accepting myself just the way I am) stop them from finishing the school that they dreamed they would finish... Even if it seems late to get your dream, don't be discouraged, just get it done. About finding and keeping a job, from my own experience, yes! it is hard and people can be cruel about AS peculiarities, but it is possible that we can find a place where we can function uninhibited, just the way we are, no eye contact, tantrums, blunt honesty, annoying exuberance etc. My philosofy is to keep on trying. I stayed in jobs that were so bad that I felt like I was abusing myself, but I never got discouraged and I kept changing them, in the hope that I will find a place where I could help people just the way I am, strange or whatever. I had the courage to finish what I have started 14 years ago. And I feel like it's getting better every day.

I want to give hope to all that have said that they did not finish school or work difficult jobs (I did, too), because of not feeling 100%, brought to their knees by autism. If I could get things done, under my circumstances, than anybody can!! !

A little note here, Kilroy started school again and tomorrow is his birthday!

Happy Birthday, Kilroy! Happy 19!! ! Many to come!! !

Congratulations on starting school!! ! Keep up the good work!! !