Blaming parents for not having a job

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Why am I wrong? Why is my life 100% my responsibility?



Why is this always the case? Does this apply even if fraud and misrespresentation was comitted? Does this mean Caveat Emptor applies in America now?



How do you derive this assertion? Why are they themselves to blame? Can you give further detailed analysis as to why this is so?



Why is all of this so? How does this every man for himself make a truly viable society? How much verifying must one do? Eventually, you have to stop verifying. What exactly is wisdom ooo? Do we mean wise choices for just oneself or others?



Why is all of this so?



What's your reasoning for this? Why are decisions as an adult solely their responsibility?

Does this mean that society is always right and the individual is always wrong? If not, what are you saying here? You have a certain set of beliefs and assumptions. Can you justify your beliefs and assumptions and why you believe them to be true and correct? Why are these beliefs and assumptions the epitome of all perfection?

All you've done is repeated the same slogans which mean nothing to me. I've heard the same slogans and they tell me nothing. I am going to make a conclusion here myself based upon his behavior and what he says.

Sweetleaf this man displays cult-like behavior. http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult_q0.html I believe that our culture in America is cult-like. This man is a member of its cult and all he is doing comforming to its standards and dictates. He believes that America is never wrong and this cult of responsibility is never wrong as well. All he will do is repeat the same slogans without questioning the essence of them. Everything that he is saying to you Sweetleaf and to me he is supposed to say. It goes with the dicates of the cult that pervades our country. By him doing this, he is accepted and belongs now. The truth is America is not free as the people here chant. America is not a place to find depthness of thought or enriching experiences. It is a place of mindless comformity. It is a business culture and it is an excellent place to do business in. It is a materialistic cultue in which one is expected to comform, and capitulate. It is a comformist culture and not an individualist culture like it is claimed. What is projected in media is completely different than what truly happens in America.

We don't control time and space. None of us are gods even though some people would like to think they are. We all have constraints as a whole as human beings and each individual is constrained by his genetics,environment. and other factors. This is my assertion. You say my assertion is wrong. I ask why.
Let's look at what this guy says. http://www.debunkingskeptics.com/Attitude_Fanatics.htm

Please take a look at what he says. His views fit some of mine.

http://www.happierabroad.com/
http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page30.htm
http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page31a.htm
http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page31.htm
http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page31b.htm

ooo, you state your assertions as though they are not to be challenged and are absolute in nature. Please, by all means give me an in-depth analysis of why you believe is true and correct and why I am wrong. Why do you believe that America and its standards are always correct and I am always wrong when I challenge these standards?

By the way, I've done my research. The employers are more focused on appearance including personality than anything else. It is not a matter of what you know but who you know. Do I have to truthfully give up my identity and my very soul in order to be employed?

Sweetleaf, when he says you always have a choice he is correct on this. It is a tautology. What you are saying is that you had no choice that produced any other positive outcomes that you saw. In fact, this is what most people really mean when they say they have no choice. I can state though that you would be better banging your head against the wall. You will not change this man's mind no matter what logic you use. He is going to believe what he believes no matter what. He would have to decide for himself to look at another side. More than likely he will not do it.

You can argue with him to have fun and strengthen your critical thinking skills but to try to change his mind will be exercise in futility and frustration. I have argued with NTs who have had these similar beliefs. I can tell you from experience you're wasting your time. Why do I do it sometimes? I guess it is because I am a glutton for punishment, I have fun and it helps me to sharpen my skills. Sometimes I may have missed something in my own arguments I make. http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/glu ... punishment

He has different perceptions and different life experiences than you and I. He is going by his own experiences, beliefs and perceptions. My advice to you Sweetleaf and this is what I'm trying to do myself is to completely circumvent the system that is in place. Don't fight the employers and don't try to figure them out. If you can start a business or be a private contractor then do. If there are other things than do so. Employers hire by word of mouth and by personality. Ability is last on their list. This is what my research has told me. ooo thinks I have not done my research. I have over two to three years. It is who you know not what you know. In a few months, I may be a private contractor of someone who owns a bunch of franchises. This is because my parents are good friends with him. My wife and I are doing something else as well together.

You seem to like Metal Sweetleaf, maybe you can do something with that. I don't know.

I believe the ultimate goal of employers in the end is to make money. They either do that by either increasing their profit margins or reducing their costs. This gave me an idea. I'm going to see if I can be an Independent or Private Contractor with any of them instead of being an employee. The thing is every human being has a profit motive and it doesn't have to be financial. I believe one has to appeal to their profit motive. Another thing, I believe every human being is selfish in someway. Everyone is looking to gain something even if it is a good feeling. I believe even Mother Theresa had a profit motive to her. I'm going to find ways to either increase their profits short term or decrease their costs short term while benefitting me. I believe being an Independent Contractor or Indie for short if I can do it right can reduce their costs.

Since I'm on the spectrum by being an Indie I believe I can reduce myself considerably as being a liability. If you can't climb the mountain then why not go around it? ooo with his crazy nonsense inadvertently got some ideas flowing for me. I will reiterate to you Sweetleaf, you will not change this man's mind or anyone with his nonsensical beliefs as well. I have years of experience to prove this to you. He will just parrot the same soundbites over and over again. Argue with him to gain ideas and have fun like I do.

As an adult....

Your life is yours.

Your choices -- your responsibility.

Your decisions -- your responsibility.

It's not the school's fault or society's fault. It's solely your fault for not doing adequate research before making choices in YOUR life.

Only YOU can take responsibility for YOUR own life. Your life is your problem, it's not up to a school or society to make sure you make decent decisions.

Cubedemon,

You make me giggle.

This is better than reading the funnies.

Critical thinking skills? On what planet is the diatribe about cults and us not controlling time critical thinking? Don't take too much of whatever you're on... that could be dangerous. Hey, let us contribute to your beer fund.

Last edited by ooo on 29 Jul 2012, 7:20 am, edited 2 times in total.

LOL. Too funny.

How exactly do you research needing to "give up your very soul to be employed?" LMAO.

Done your research? On what? There is zero research that employers are 100% focused on appearance and NOTHING else.

Let's see how far that gets you in a successful career.

You want to be homeless, starving, and waste time bumming around jobless?

Suit yourself. I'm sure it's great fun to be homeless, starving, and bumming around and/or living in your mother's basement.

Otherwise, to support oneself, you need a job. That, or bum of society, which is a waste of time if you have any capacity whatsoever to work.

Why do grown adults work?

So they can eat.
So they can afford a place to live.
So they don't waste time all day playing video games.
So they can afford their own place to live.
So they can contribute to society, not bumming around on welfare.
So they can make productive use of their lives, instead of pitying themselves.
So they can become educated.
So they can take responsibility for their own lives, instead of blaming everyone else for their failures.
So they can make money and buy what they want.
So they can make money and travel and explore cultures.
So they don't waste their lives, being uneducated fools bumming on welfare when they have the potential to work and be useful adults.

You were 18. 18 is an ADULT.

Even if you were misinformed, YOU should have verified what they told you. At 18, you're an adult and it's your responsibility to research and make informed choices. Being misinformed at 18 is no excuse. You were told whatever it was you were told, but you didn't-- as an 18 year old ADULT-- take responsibility for your life and find out if what people told you was true. YOU chose to go to school. YOU chose to get student loans. YOU chose to, as an 18 year old adult, believe whatever people told you. It's your responsibility to verify what people tell you. Your choices are solely a result of your decisions. At 18, you're too old to blame others for your lack of research in making decisions about what to do with your life.

I didn't say people should beat themselves up forever for their choices. Learn from your mistakes. Make wiser choices for yourself in the future.

Learn from your mistakes. Take responsibility for your life. Stop blaming other people for your problems and your decisions about school.
Accept that once, you at 18 years old, chose yourself to attend some school and have debt. You messed up that one decision-- that doesn't mean that you can't learn from your mistake. It was solely your mistake, and you can make a wiser decision next time by researching. Research career and educational options now. Then, make a wiser choice for your own life next time. By realizing that you alone made the decision to attend that school, you alone made a poor decision. You don't have to make a poor decision now-- learn from your past mistakes to avoid repeating your mistakes.

Regardless of external influences (being misinformed, peer pressure, lack of certain career/education opportunities, poor economy, poverty), you can't blame society. There are influences, but your decisions are your own. When you accept responsibility for your own life and your own decisions, you can choose what you want in life and WORK towards your goals.

Plenty of people educate themselves and work their way out of poverty and move on to Ivy League colleges. Others start their own company in a garage in the ghetto, wisely making choices about their life that ultimately lead to their success. They don't blame the "cards they were dealt" or "societal influences"-- they realize their life is their responsibility and succeed because they choose to accept responsibility for themselves.

I never said that they were 100% focused on personality. I said they were focused more on appeance including personality. In fact, this is the top thing they focus on first. I've talked to various people and I've been to one of these "rehab" places you are talking about. It was a shocker to me. Appearance and personality is king.

"give up your very soul to be employed" is a metaphor. What I am saying is based upon the research I have done and the questions I have asked of various people I would have to pretend to be something I am not. To me, this is dishonest and employers do not deserve someone who is dishonest. The people I have asked are well educated and not from any slum or ghetto.

This means we're back in the days of caveat emptor am I correct? This means I can't expect truth from what others say am I correct? If yes, how can one expect the research to be accurate as well? If one can't they how is it logically possible to take 100% responsibility for your life. It's like saying that if a person buys a junker of a car and it was promoted in better condition than it truly is it is this person's fault am I correct? If yes, why?

All I am saying is its the school staff at my highschools fault they misinformed me......not that I am blaming everything that went wrong on the school staff. I mean hell I'm the one who packed up and went to the college, I only wish I had been smart enough then to have thought it through and not trusted the more experianced 'adults' who I thought were there to help.

Also it kind of helps if you can handle the class load and pass the classes, which I couldn't so I don't think I'll be pulling myself out of poverty via Ivy League colleges, don't know if I would fit in with the types who go there anyways. Also I do not blame everything on external factors but to me it is silly to suggest external factors do not play a role. Also I already have a problem with beating myself up too hard mentally when things go wrong so the last thing I need to do is try and convince myself its even my fault the teachers mis-informed me about college I think its healthier to acknowledge misleading information played a role and that I should do my own reaseach about things before jumping into them from now on. If I sit here thinking 'oh I am such an idiot for going to college.' and such then I'll only depress myself.

Why?






This is only true to a certain extent. What I am asking for from you is the in depth philosophical reasoning behind it. Your belief system makes no logical sense to me whatsoever. How can one make wise decisions if the information is erroneous including research? How is it always possible to always verify information no matter the medium? How is it possible for a person to take 100% responsibility no matter what the constraints are? What is the logic behind your conclusion? What you and society ask and demand is a logical absurdity and impossiblity of an individual? If there is a logical basis then I do not mentally grasp it.

You're stating things as though they're self-evident. For me, they are not. I do not understand how you come your belief system and why you believe it is viable? What I am asking for is why is it wrong to blame? Why is the extreme internal locus of control the right way to go and think? What is your reasoning? How do you and the rest of society derive this?

There things I am doing for myself since I can't rely upon others to be truthful and since society is caveat emptor now. How can you defend charlatans and liars? For me, this is incomprehensible? This does not compute in my mind. The things you and others say make no sense whatsoever. It is like stepping into Wonderland that Alice went into. It is like up is down and down is up. You're not the only person I've talked to. None of them including you has been able to provide sound justification for what you believe that I am truthfully able to even grasp. Your whole society that you accept and its tenets that make it up make no sense I do not see how they have any basis in the physical laws of time and space. You accept them as lock, stock, and barrel and see it as the way it is. You see people as being hoodwinked and swindled and see this as ok but if the victim complains then he is seen as being a whiner, a complainer,etc. Why is this? What is the rationale behind this?

Our whole code of law that has evolved over thousands of years says the opposite. Biblical law and hammurabi's code as well. The person who is at fault is the one who misrepresents and commits fraud.

Why is living always noble and death always ignoble? The unexamined life is not worth living. Why is survival always considered noble? I see things more precious than getting a job and life itself like my soul and my identity. If one can't pursue truth which for me is nourishment for my very inner essence and soul then is it more noble to live a lie and pretend to be something I am not? Do I put on an act for others and deceive them. Am I nourishing their souls by doing this? Do you see my connumdrum ooo? If society requires this of me than I can't give this to society whatsoever. It is not for sale in our business culture. For me, because of this I see death as more noble than my own life itself. I see my very soul as more precious than my own life. Thanks but no thanks. I'll take the hemlock. If history proves itself to be true and repeats itself this may turn out to be the case and I will gladly accept it.

A lot of people parrot out things and give the right amount of verbal and non-verbal language and this is their key to success. In America, one is supposed to present himself as though he is respectable and responsibile whether he is or not. They are supposed to appear successful and more successful than really are. I have observed this time and time again. I believe this is what some people do in these threads and other threads on different websites. Wrongplanet rules will not allow me to call certain people out or else I would. Appearance is #1 in this country.

Sweetleaf, The Emperor is Nude!! !

If that were genuinely the case, there'd be billions more Bill Gates in the world. Sadly the way the world works, things *ARE* outside your control. For some reason, there's only enough room for one Bill Gates. However, blaming the world etc often serves little purpose, other than being cathartic. You would be better off putting effort into doing something positive and useful instead.

When I went to University, I achieved a first class honours degree with relative ease. This was something within my control. I went to lectures, I studied, I wrote essays, I read feedback on those essays - and aimed to do better each time. When it comes to getting a job, you're banking on someone *GIVING* you that job, amongst many others. The reality is, an Aspie compared to an NT, is the least likely to be chosen. And the unemployment statistics even back this up. Amongst disabilities, people with Aspergers, mental health problems, and learning disabilities, are all at the very top of the list of the most unemployed. It's very different when trying to go to university, as more students means more money for the university - they're not exactly going to refuse you.

When you're applying for a job, you have to convince someone that you're worth giving money to do something for them. This is the fault of capitalism and greed. Employers often ignore equality laws, because what matters to them in the end is making money or looking good to their boss. The reality is people only care about themselves. No one gives a carp about a disability.

And if starting your own business, there's a certain amount of luck involved. Even people who create a business with a great idea, a product people want, and put lots of hard work and effort in - can end up going bust.