Fired. . .

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I have been fired from my position. I did my job fine, however I have been fired due to my inability to work well with my co-workers. My reputation in this field is ruined and I will never again work in it. Being unemployed I will loose my health care, and income not allowing me to make my morage payments, car payements other such payments causing me to loose t. My degree is of no use to me any more and I have not paid off all of my loans. Does any one know of services offered, legal aid?

What do/did you do at work?

in Nevada at least, your health care coverage will continue up to six months after your dismissal.

Honestly this is not the end of the world. Lots of people are being laid off. You need to be realistic. If you are in certian fields you can find a new job fairly easily. Your degree is not worthless. You may have to move to find a new job, but that is not necessarily a bad thing.

I know this situation sucks, it does. But you can move on from it.

It could be anywhere in between. It's not good to be fired from a job for vague reasons just because they don't like you, I can tell you that from personal experience (even if they verbalize it with something more specific, it's rather as though they're reaching to find a peg to hang their hat).

But the economy might be coming back, if you look for good jobs, maybe even better jobs than this one, a plum might fall from the tree (imagine a boss who appreciates a serious, diligent employee, I tell myself!).

Probably need to find your own happy medium between looking for a good job and looking for a job that's merely a stop-gap job.

All the best! And welcome to our group!

In the US, your right to healthcare is covered under COBRA. The ARRA (the Obama relief bill) allows for a large subsidy of this (approximately 2/3). You have a legal right to this if you lose your job for any reason besides quitting (ie; fired, or laid off). Also, in the circumstances you have described here, you are most likely eligible for unemployment in many states.

Go immediately to your local unemployment office and start the paperwork for that - there may be a waiting period of a couple weeks, so if you do it right away you may not have to miss a paycheck. It won't be as much as you were making, but it'll help you survive while you decide what else you're going to do.

Don't ever think for one minute this was about your worth. It's about other people's intolerance, that is not your fault, and not everybody is like that.

Don't panic. Millions go through this every day. I've personally been through it more times than I can readily count. For many of us with AS, it just becomes a fact of life after a while. Learn to make Chumbawamba's Tubthumbing your mantra: "I get knocked down, but I get up again, no one's ever gonna keep me down."

Get right back in the ring and keep plugging away. It really p*sses the Rat B*st*rds off when they can't make you give up.

Hello jump33,

I'm very sorry about what happened. Obviously, you know your own situation much better than I (or anyone else here) can; in general, if you "simply" did not get along with others, but did not seriously harm anyone or break the law, you may able to work in your field again, whatever it may be.

Willard is quite right about pursuing unemployment benefits. Your former employer and/or the state itself may contest your claim; if you did not commit any serious wrongs (such as insubordination or repeated latenesses) you may still get benefits.

You may want to use the opportunity to evaluate how you come across to others. Pretty much every workplace has one or more political traps, backstabbing co-workers, nasty bosses and/or other issues. Your job is to make sure those problems don't become your problems.

Other people might well treat you unfairly or have unreasonable expectations. Sometimes we have to choose the lesser of two evils, and once in a while the lesser evil is subordinating your sense of right and wrong to keeping your job.

Of course, it's entirely possible you behaved unreasonably, snapped at people, appeared like you were looking for a fight - even when you didn't realize it. Stranger things have happened. Humans in general, and Aspies in particular, have difficulty realizing when we're the ones in the wrong.

Incidentally, I was fired from more jobs than you can shake a stick at before I even heard of AS, let alone began to understand why so many people rejected me. It might have been that their mean, intolerant natures wouldn't let them accept my objectively reasonable self. Problem: I can only control my behavior, not how others choose to react to it. So I've learned to go along to get along.

What do you think?

Where you actually Fired ie Terminated with cause or, just Laid Off? Depending on your situation you may be able to challenge your termination if it wasn't done properly.

OK, one problem at a time:

I have been fired from my position. I did my job fine, however I have been fired due to my inability to work well with my co-workers. Yep, been there, done that, got the souvenir t-shirt and mug. In fact it happened so many times that the only way I found of dealing with it was to become an independent contractor, once I started to get people's backs up I moved on.

My reputation in this field is ruined and I will never again work in it. Ummmm, maybe you're being a bit dramatic here. Unless you're either a) internationally famous or b) working in a field which is rather unique such as nuclear weapons research or ferret sexing I doubt that a change of career is required.

Being unemployed I will loose my health care, and income not allowing me to make my morage payments, car payements other such payments causing me to loose t. OK, finance. If you've been sensible then there should be some money put by until the unemployment checks start to come in. If not, why not? Talk to the people lending money and explain your situation. Be nice.

My degree is of no use to me any more and I have not paid off all of my loans. My degree was obtained thirty years ago and I still make use of the knowledge gained. In any event a lot of employers see a degree as proof that you can work towards a goal rather than proof of knowledge. How come people with History degrees get jobs as bankers for example? As for the loans, see above.

Does any one know of services offered, legal aid? Get local advice.

This large dose of reality was brought to you as a public service by those of us who have done most of the above and survived to tell the tale.

Vanilla_Slice

Being in collections, it is Very Important that you contact ALL of your creditors NOW. This will allow them to work with you to keep any damage to your credit to a minimum. . And they are willing to work with you at this point. the further you go past due with contacting them the harder it is for them to assist you in keeping your loans current.

Thanks for the replies / advice. I am still a bit lost as what to do, but one step at a time. Are there any advocy programs / agencies for aspergers? Its a bit late to challenge the termination, papers are signed. I am unsure what I should say if I am publically asked about my seperation, smile nod, walk away. . . .

I was only fired for my inability to communicate with co-workers nothing to do with job performance. I have heard of cases where another co-worker approached another co-worker and gave them a list of asperger characteristics and recommended that seek a professional. Thi story had a wonderful ending, but I can see how being approached could be very degrading or threatening. However is someone could have approached me and I was some how "forced" to be evaluated therefor forcing my employeer to make accomidation for me it could have saved my job / career. I also could have come out and stated it, which I kind of did, named it a disorder and explained how problem solving would have to be different, they only took it as I was telling them what to do.

It just seems that if termination is based of a employees inability to get along with co-workers some steps should be put into place for renegotiation. I also believe an evaluation should take place to determine if the said employee has aspergers. IF so then the staff should be educated and supportive about the changes that may take place. I don't know about you but I like to learn about better ways to help others.

It's just a thouhgt, education is key unless the educators refure to open the door my co-workers never did

Hello jump33,

I completely agree with you that if only people resolved conflicts and hurt feelings by approaching those who offended them and honestly working out a solution, life would be much better (and fairer). Unfortunately, most humans don't work that way.

(And everyone learns to pick one's battles to a greater or lesser extent and thus to let some incidents pass without acting on them...while not necessarily forgetting about those incidents.)

Also, the way in which you phrase things matters a great deal. If you explain how problem solving will have to be different, indeed they will take it as your telling them what to do. And that is a bad idea, especially in the workplace.

One thing you can do is explain your situation, and make suggestions (such as approaching you and telling you directly of any issues), while explaining your reasons (you have great difficulty detecting interpersonal issues on your own without being told; your strength is that you take direct criticism very well) and ask for their input. They may be able to propose a way that can be better for everyone.

I'm not sure what you mean about being publicly asked about the termination. Unless you are a politician or something like that, probably the most common situation in which you'll be asked about your termination is a job interview. In that case, be positive. If you bad-mouth people at your previous employer, even if you are right, you will probably not get the job. It may not always be fair but it is true.

When you get your next job, since you know you're an Aspie you would be well advised to disclose and ask for reasonable accommodations as soon as you are on board. Remember that the ADA does not require retroactive accommodations; if you wait until after you are disciplined to disclose, they do not have to adjust that discipline in any way.

Last but not least, I'm sure there are advocates and programs for Aspies in your area...where are you located?

Good luck to you, jump33!