Discrimination at work. How to handle?? Any help is great!!

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Hi everyone! This is my first post so hope this is the right place to post. I was diagnosed with Asperger's, Autism, Tourette's Syndrome, ADD, and OCD at the age of 6. I am currently taking medication to help alleviate some of my problems functioning in the world, I am on Depakote, Prozac, and Abilify, also Clonodine for Tourettes as needed. I went through high school with an IEP and had a parapro but made all A's and a 4.1 GPA, I am 19 years of age and have a part time job at an undisclosed retail grocery store.

The problem I have run into is I have some motor skill deficits and personality issue's that tie into my Asperger's and Tourette's. Sometimes my thought's and the way I respond to certain situations are not how most other people would like and my responses are odd.

Well to put it in short context, I had an ingrown toenail which I had to have surgery to remove. I nicely called up to my store and asked my front end manager if I could wear flip-flop's to work and she rudely said NO and slammed the phone down. Of course this upset's me and I start crying as I get upset very easy. I had explained to her that I had all these mental impairments when I started there and she had absolutely no idea what any of them were and kinda blew me off about it. She doesn't know there is a special way to deal with autistic kids I guess? There are several other thing's she has done that have been very insensitive towards thing's I honestly in all good will cannot help that I do. If I get off track a little at work, instead of her nicely reminding me to stay on track she yell's at me.

Well today I went by to deliver my doctor's notice about my toe and not being able to work for a few day's and the store's Co-Director was very hateful towards me, first she told me that asking the question of can I wear flip flops was just crazy and stupid. She said I should know better and she really doesn't care because it's not her problem.

I explained to her that I have Autism and Tourette's and Asperger's and all that and she said "Well then maybe you should not be working for this company because that's how things are done around here and even company policy is like that and how this place may not be right for me, but she openly admitted I was a very good worker and I do my job very well"...

After I told her about the ADA and how she can't treat me unfairly and I started crying because this really hurt my feelings bad. After growing up in Alabama and the deep south, I got called a ret*d, an idiot and every other name you could think of in the book because I was different. It really wasn't something I wanted to hear at work. Especially since I am trying so hard to do my job well and overcome all the hurdles in my life.
She quickly changed her attitude when she realized what she was saying could potentially get her and the company in trouble, she grudgingly apologized and then went on to even say, "Were all a bit crazy". Like that's really going to make me feel better.

Please can someone give me some advice on what to do about this? I'm not wanting any money out of this or any type of money compensation for anyone who thinks this is a scam because this isn't. I'm just wanting justice.
I really liked this job up until all this because it really made me feel important and made me feel like I could do something in life and it's really motivating for someone like me. Now I am really depressed and I don't even feel like going back because I don't feel like anyone will treat me fair knowing they are working with someone who has a mental disability, I am scared to even walk in the door's now. And I feel like they are going to pick out everything I do wrong now just so they can fire me because they think I can't do anything now they know I have all this wrong with me.

I have contacted HR at the corporate level but they are no help. Is there any Disabilities rights groups who I can reach out to about this or something?

Please and thanks in advanced for any help. It will be greatly appreciated..

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Distressed Boy In Need

First, hello, and welcome to Wrong Planet!

I wish I had some advice for you, but I don't.

I sure, though, that there are people in this forum that can give it. Good Luck!

The Autism Self Advocacy Network might be able to give you some advice. Clicky.

It's horrible that this is happening, I hope you get it sorted and they get what's coming to them.

This is one of how your boss handles you.

A lot depends on if incidents like this continue or if there is meaningful change. In your condition, you might be inclined to take offense over little things that were not intended to hurt, so you have to try to be objective when something happens so you don't misread what really took place.

Still, IF this continues to be a problem, you likely need to take it up with someone at "home office" (wherever her boss is), but as a preventative measure, IF this problem continues, you should simultaneously file a complaint with EEOC because the law really does nothing for people if they are fired before they file a complaint. Anything bad that happens AFTER a complaint is on file is presumed to be retaliation. Anything that happens before is not.

In any case. Take the time to document this and other incidents. Note dates, time, details, people involved. This way, if you must file a complaint, you can prove what happened (or at least not have to trust your memory to recall all the details).

I hope this resolves itself and things get better for you.

WOW I have an employee who thinks I'm dumb. Well he is a bigot just like this woman who said that to you at your job. I wish I can look for another job, but there is no escaping people who are ignorant bastards/bigots. Once people hear autism or learning disability they just assume dumb, ret*d, idiot, etc. It is discrimination when employers say such things to us. She is just a mean b**** and a bigot. It's her problem not yours. This employee of mine told me that maybe they should get rid of me and find someone else who doesn't have aspergers. Now if my dad were to pull what that dad did on the school bus to defend his disabled daughter I'm all for it. I can defend myself at work, but sometimes when I defend myself it makes the employees even more mad. It's like employees want to feel this power over us. Bullies want to feel so important, tough and number 1, but when you defend yourself or get someone else involved it just makes them more mad. I wish we can all hurt people who think we are dumb back. I never met you nor your lady employee but I hate her because she is a bigot.

Hi,
I do not have any legal advise for you but I just wanted to share a few of my thoughts. I have worked at alot of places and have been treated very badly. I remember people telling me things like, "your so nice I don't understand why everyone is mean to you. " I have had managers single me out and get rid of me on my job as well. I still have some struggles with people making fun of me, talking about me, or just misunderstanding me. I can say that for me it has gotten much better over time. I think that there are a few reasons. One, I have learned how to cope and handle stressful situations in a way that appears more "NT" and that lessens that attention on myself. Also, I have had to accept myself for who I am and become more comfortable with myself. Through this I have gained some confidence which helps me as well. Everytime I got picked on, singled out, or ridiculed I purposed to do a few things. 1. Not allow those people that satisifaction or gratification of getting there way (to shove me into a sick box they constructed for me, whatever the name of the box may be, it is different for every situation). 2. Learn what I could have done differently (even though they were wrong). How can I improve my skills, what kind of education can I get from this. 3. Not harbor resentment - that has been a battle I have had plenty to be bitter about and I am still working on this. I have had to leave some situations that were just too toxic and abusive. Other situations I just projected confidence (I faked it alot of the time) and this diffused the situation.
I am still learning and growing and I am sorry for your situation but it is not hopeless. You can grow from this and become a stronger person. Do not let the judgemental glares of others determine your worth. Sometimes you a just a stimuli that brings out the ugliness in there heart. It could have been any other stimuli but that day you happened to be it. You manager has got some big time issues.

what you're experiencing is something many of us have been through. it is very hard to accept,and maybe you do not have to.

i was injured terribly many years ago and when i returned to work, our ceo saw me and was not happy. due to injuries to both feet, i had to wear a different kind of shoe on each foot. he was concerned what the public might think. he really couldn't let me go due to the job i was doing.......so he had me move to the office next to the loading dock area, where no one other than employees and people i HAD to deal with could see the gimp. i've worked for other humans who were cruel about my speech problems and inability to understand social protocols.

the only way for payback is:go talk to an attorney. most lawyers will talk to you, to see if you have a 'case', for free and will work on a contingency basis. they're generally called ambulance chasers, but if you're wronged and have not other way to fight back, why not try the last avenue open to you. just make sure about first visit for free.

the eeoc told me it's ok to discriminate in some cases. hope you have better luck if you go that route.