Molested, Verbally Abused at workplace

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many bosses have tried taking chances with me at workplace
they would touch me up at odd places
and keep calling me into their cabin and type letters
in their PC and they would stand behind and come closer
trying to show me mistakes while typing

Also i was badly verbally abused at many workplaces
in one place i was called psycho, sick, dumb,
another place i was called demented, mad hatter, boss told he would get me arrested for typing wrong letter
and would keep me jail for all nonsense work i do

Yet another place nobody wanted to talk with me, neither share tiffin
there i was told that i never smile so something strange is there with me

With so much abuse physically, sexually and verbally i dont have courage to find any more jobs

why do you think it happens with me???

Fault is not in you but theirs. They are some dangerous sick people using their authority in wrong ways and use people when they get a chance. perhaps you can get your spirits up and still keep looking for a job because no matter how many abusive job places you find theres always a jobplace where people are better. Not every person is an a55h0le. Maybe you could learn to stand up for yourself for a bit, though you might not have an idea how to do it, googleing, reading or asking for advice may help. And ofcouse there are others who can give an even better ideas how to cope or have a solution.

Maybe it's the clothing you wear, or the way you speak or look, or many other things that people usually prey on. Some thing with signals that people pick up but you might not be aware because you dont function the way they do.

I have also heard that you can tell the police about being abused or something like that. Sexual abuse or such.

Namaste, I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience in so many workplaces. I have also been sexually harassed and humiliated at work by older men who had higher positions in the company, as well as several times during college. It gets better with age, but you also can start doing things about it NOW. One is to take action immediately when someone invades your body space. Step away, walk away, get up and look them in the face, etc. However you choose to respond, DON'T freeze and be quiet...become a moving target rather than a sitting duck! Dress appropriately...even dress like a stuffy old maid if you have to. Dating is for after work and NEVER on the job, so who cares if you're cute and appealing at the job? All you have to do is be clean, well-groomed and professional.

If it helps, watch some DVD's that feature women who successfully get rid of sexual pests. They show a lot of confidence and toughness. Sometimes you just have to "fake it until you make it" in building self-confidence, but with practice it DOES work. "Aliens" with Sigourney Weaver is a great one, as is the French film "La Femme Nikita." These women are attractive and powerful, and they don't take ANY crap from men.

At a school I worked in, we had a watertight rule that staff were NEVER allowed to be with only one student, one-on-one. You always had to have "a third," i.e. a second student or a second member of staff, to act as a witness and to make sure there was no nonsense going on, and to make sure no one could make up lies about the other party. Allegations of sexual harassment of a student could lead to the end of careers and even jail terms, so we all took this rule very seriously and stuck to it religiously. You may wish to do your best to make sure, as best as you can, to have "a third" with you when you encounter your harassers. The men, of course, will probably only try messing with you when they can get you alone, so it will be a bit of a cat-and-mouse game for awhile, but do your best and plan some strategies...handy excuses, shouting through the door ("I can't come to the door right now because..."), and so on. And of course, if there is an HR official at your workplace, talk to them immediately! You may not feel comfortable about disclosing the men's names, or even filing formal complaints, but you will be advised of what the company policy is and you can ask the HR person what advice s/he has to give you on how to deal with the situation. Good luck...I really do feel for you, having been there myself!

ive always said everyone should have a hidden camera with them. You can buy one relatively cheap in many stores. They have the shape of pens or stress-relief toys.. you name it.

In your situation, simply put it somewhere near you where the camera will get a good view of yourself and the other person... and film it. When they try to be improper you need to be ready to tell them to stop..if they continue you can simply walk out with your camera and go straight to an attorney. DO NOT go to HR.

Remember , HR is there to prevent the company from getting sued. Thats their job. Go to an attorney first and get their advice on how to proceed.


Thing is, most HR units will simply ask you to write a complaint which will then take weeks for it to get anywhere. Rarely do managers get fired (from what ive seen they need to rip your clothes off or something that drastic for it) and instead get a warning.. and you're left with the option of transferring to another dept with the 'stigma' of being a person that goes to HR (that gets around around management) or staying where you are under the same person's management who will be trying hard to get rid of you through technicalities like 1 minute late clock-ins or silly stuff like that.

So no, go to an attorney first. If all goes well you might even be able to get some money out of a lawsuit. Companies never change anything unless it costs them money. So go git some I say.

I have never got job in big companies its always been at small business firms run by family.
They employ 1-2 people to do the letter typing work etc.
So usually wherever i have worked there were only 2-3 staff members
Its not about inappropriate dress or anything
but rather that i was very naive, quite and dumb like
they saw that they could take advantage easily
and wont react to it....i just used to cry
just like in my house where parents used to beat me up and i was crying mercilessly.
but now i avoid going to work at such places where there are just 2-3 staff.
infact from last 3 years im at home jobless.

oh im sorry to hear that.


If it is not in your nature to fight back at the time it happens you can still do something about it afterwards. I would still suggest consulting a lawyer for advice on this matter.

I hope you find a good job where you're respected namaste.