I don't think I can work anymore
I don't expect anyone to support what I am saying, but I'm just using what medium I can to vent a bit.
I get increased anxiety and restlessness from working. Also when I am at work, I'm having dizzy spells and I've had at least 3 panic attacks at work this past week.
I don't think I can handle the pressure of working, even though my register does come up within the OK range.
Over the time I've been there, there have been multiple people giving me applications to give to the manager (which of course I do). I don't know what position they are applying for, but I feel that if there are constant applications going around, they can hopefully find someone to "replace" me should I leave.
It's a fast pace job and I don't think I can handle increased symptoms and risk my mental health just for extra cash.
I know for a fact that I can't work anywhere "under the table".
Feel free to comment if you want to. If you have questions, ask. I'm not afraid to respond.
I know I have to move forward but I think right now moving in the "right" direction is to leave work for the sake of my mental health.
Georgia
Sea Gull
Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 242
Location: At the foot of the mountain
I think I would do the same thing in your situation. The longest i have ever been at a job is 2 years. I've usually quit my other jobs because of stress. The work itself was not too bad, but inter-relating to co-workers and bosses got to be too much.
I'm on disability now (for other health problems made worse by stress) so it's a relief not to have to think about working.
At some point I'd like to learn better coping skills, but in middle-age I think that's asking a lot.
You have to be your own best advocate. (I say this as I am still learning to do it myself!)
_________________
Hoppiness is lurv.
I understand completely. I was fortunate enough to fall into a career that allowed me to work in a closed room by myself most of the time and I still managed to get fired every 15 months or so for getting on management's nerves. In between, I did occasionally have to take a desperation job doing something more mainstream and I could never deal with the stress and the pressure, either. Some were worse than others, but I was certainly not cut out to do just any old job - it had to fit very narrow requirements, or I was a nervous wreck in a matter of weeks. I managed to stay in the work force for 35 years, but almost half of that was living on unemployment in between jobs while I recuperated and decompressed from the stress of the last one I got fired from.
I once worked in a call center, and I hated it with such a passion. I also started feeling panicky (not full-blown panic attacks, though). My acid reflux became worse and worse, so it started causing a daily sore throat and multiple infections. I missed out on a lot of work because of it.
When they finally fired me, I didn't even fight it. I was actually pretty happy about it. I decided to start working at a pet store instead, because I enjoy volunteering at the local animal shelter. After all, if I enjoy doing it for free, then surely I'll enjoy getting paid for it!
At the pet store, I felt like I was in heaven for months because I had something so horrible to compare it to. My new coworkers noted my enthusiasm and thought I was crazy, but I thought they were crazy for not thinking the place was awesome.
It's been over a year, and I've grown complacent again, but panic attacks are always a strong sign that something needs to change. You can't find the job of your dreams if you're clinging to one that impairs your health.
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