Afraid of working

Post Reply New Topic

For several months now, my mom has kicked me out of her house and I've been living in alot of different places. She said that if I didn't want to get a job or go to college right after I graduated, then I couldn't be there. I would still live with her but none of my relatives will let me live with them because they love conditionally. I don't fit their standards. And most of my friends are either younger than me or don't have their own place yet, otherwise they'd be happy to let me stay with them.
As of right now, I've lived at my friend's house for over a month now and his mom helped me get an ID and SS card. She pressures me to try to get a job even though I've told her that I don't want to because I'm worried that I won't enjoy it and end up getting fired or just quit. I'm also worried that my lack of attention sometimes like reading every single thing that something says could end up getting me in trouble. In example maybe I'd sign something and leave a part out because I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts and then they would try to say that I lied to the government and punish me. I feel like I'm not ready to handle so much responsibility and that I shouldn't have to if I don't want to. The only thing I need money for is to pay my storage unit. Honestly I might be content living in a woods somehwhere in a tent rather than live at a shelter where they would wake me up and force me to be on the street for X amount of hours before letting me go back inside. I prefer finding someone who will let me live with them though. The other big thing that upsets me about the idea of working is the fact that it would limit my time and freedom. I'd be really disappointed if a friend invited me over or there was some event that I'd have to miss because of working. I feel like no one hardly gives my alternative sort of lifestyle a chance just because they aren't used to it. And I don't intend to take advantage of anyone who lets me live with them. It's their choice whether they want me there or not. Am I really in the wrong for wanting to live like this, or is it okay?

I am often afraid of failing or what if I couldn't do it.

Also working and missing out on stuff is part of life so yes it would be wrong to not work because of it. It's just like being in school where you had to miss out on TV shows and other events so it's the same with work. Sure you can get time off but bosses won't keep giving you time off if you abuse it because it's meant for things like doctor appointments or family emergencies or when a child is sick or for when someone gets married. I made that mistake once because I took it literal and had the wrong impression until my supervisor told me what requesting days off were really for. So once I learned, I stopped doing it.


Also not working because you want freedom is also wrong.

The mom's reaction is not surprising... she is helping you out and want to see you moving towards independence.... you will probably get on better with her and be able to stay longer if you try and look for some kind of work. Maybe try to get some volunteer work initially (then you have less pressure on you can work less hours, and still say you are building experience and learning skills for paid work as well) or maybe you could do something like delivering catalogues or wash a few peoples cars or windows or weed their gardens or something. If you manage to get enough to cover your food at your friends place his mom will probably really appreciate it and start to put less pressure on you.

Only scammers and money launderers want to employ me.

Employment terrifies me. I've got pressure from the job centre aswell, which I can't cope with. I know they're going to put me somewhere like a high fashion shop with a crowd of bitchy nasty young girls with thick make-up and top fashionable clothes what look down upon girls like me, and they will bully me. I've heard of this happening before, and there's a small shopping centre a bus ride away from me full of top fashion shops and they always seem to be advertising for vacancies, and I just know I will get sent there with no choice (otherwise they will stop my job-seekers money). The reason why there are always job advertisements there is because people have enough of it and leave, and every time I go in most of the shops there I see staff being left on their own to have full responsibility of the shop and the customers. I can't do that for toffee. Think about it - an Aspie, being left on her own, to multitask and fully interact with customers and selling top fashionable clothes.....I don't think so. They might aswell get a person with no arms to do construction work.