Burning out, need a change, but don't know what to do

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I thought I had things all figured out. Long story short, I've had a few different jobs (most of them short-lived and/or miserable), and after a rough road, finally got myself back at university and things had gone fairly well this last school year. I thought I had my ultimate career goal all figured out. I wanted to be a mathematician, but as I gain more experience and learn things about the job, I'm not so sure. It seems that to be successful at it, I would have to deal with a lot of frustration on a daily basis, and even worse, more or less devote my whole life to it. I do not want to live that way. I really just want a job that I like, I don't even have to love it, where I just put in my 8 hours a day and that's it. It seems like a lot of jobs aren't that nice though. We live in an over-worked, over-achieving culture. I am actually a hard working person, but only to a point. This summer, I got a job assisting a mathematician, which I was thrilled about at first, but now I'm just frustrated and disenchanted with it. I've been taking classes too to catch up on my undergraduate degree a bit, and I really have not had a significant amount of free time since last summer. I feel like I should finish my degree as I'm about half way through, but I'm just so sick of never having any time to myself, and this will continue if I stay in school. But if I don't stay in school, I am jobless, and I really don't know what kind of job I could find. I have no talent outside of efficiency with numbers and rote memory, I have difficulty interacting with people, and difficulty learning new things. I don't post here too much (mainly due to lack of free time ), but I do read many of the messages, and you're a great group, so I'm open to suggestions. If anyone can realte to this and tell me how they might handle it, I'm all ears.

In short, I'm just between a rock and a hard place - It seems like I have to choose between working myself to the point of burn out (which is a VERY bad thing for me when it happens - it took me a good 8 months or so to recover last time it happened), being jobless, or stuck in a go-nowhere, miserable low-paying job.

I am in a very similar situation. All though I don't have the rote memory skills. I am very good at Mathematics, especially at understanding fundamentally what is going on with many of the complex ideas. In stead of memorizing equations, I figure out what the equation actually means and how to derive it. Unfortunately I am not exceptionally brilliant at Mathematics, I am very good and I really nail in understanding many concepts and can think fairly abstractly.. just not enough to get a phd and become a professor I think. Plus the Math Professor Jobs are starting to dry up, I've read in some job outlook.

I am too clumsy to work any job that is a trade. I think way too much to like any job that is boring and repetitive. I have gained enough social skills that I could teach, which I am looking into... but I couldn't deal with the public school system. So I would only be able to teach at a private school... but I've heard those aren't the best paying jobs. I was also looking into private tutoring... which could fit very well... but then again the paying possibilities could be low.

Right now I am looking into becoming a statistician. This is my goal for now, it will allow me to figure out and understand things and get payed for it. I will work primarily in the scope of ideas and information. And I would think that direct day to day pressure would be low, perhaps when deadlines come it will be hard... but I can manage that for a while... compared to other jobs where there are pressures every day... I'd take this though. There is some social interaction, in that you will need to explain complex things to people who could care less about the technical details. This would be the hardest part about being a statistician I think.

I frankly am taking a bit of a slow route to College Graduation, but then I have had a part-time job during college... so I can't devote myself completely to School. I have only taken 12-15 credits or so, every semester. And am looking to graduate after 5 1/2, 6 years. And to become a statistician it will take getting a Masters degree at least, which will be another 2+ years. A long way to doing what you want, but I'd rather have it this way than be burned out.

Thanks for your input Pugly, I appreciate it. A couple things you said I can relate to: I'm pretty good at math, but not brilliant, and becoming a professor would be more trouble than it would be worth to me. I had also thought about teaching, but there is no frickin' way I could deal with high school kids everyday. And I've thought about tutoring too, but I think it would be pretty tough to make a living at that. There's some people who think I'm so smart, but it's just that I'm good at remembering stuff - I don't really understand it most of the time. I should probably slow down a bit in terms of school too, but I guess it's just that the longer I stay in school, the longer I have to support myself with loans or low-paying jobs, and that sucks. Plus, I'm not even sure of what I would want to do after I finish now. The thing that really scares me is the possiblity that this could all be for nothing - sure, there's good jobs out there for someone with a math degree, but given my limitations, I'm so scared of not being able to find something that works for me. Anyway, thanks again for your time and energy, it's got me thinking a bit.

I have recently decided that if I could do it all again...I would deliver flowers...people like flowers...and I would get to drive around all day listening to the radio...of course...I have also decided that in my next life I want an IQ of about 85...pretty high functioning...but blissfully unaware of the complexities and larger problems of life

Also, people allways tell me to look into becoming an Actuary. It's something I have thought of, and I may try my hand at taking a test or two down the line. But those actuary exams may prove to need too much rote memorization for me.

But if you can pass these exams, then finding a Job should be easy. Because of the very hard exams needed to get a job, supply for Actuarys doesn't quite reach up to demand. So Actuarys get paid great, and have job satisfaction is supposedly really high for Actuarys.... or so I have read.

Hey stlf, I can relate to that. I've often wished I were a little lower functioning too. Sometimes I just feel stuck in the middle - I'm high functioning enough that people expect me to be "normal", but I'm not quite high functioing enough to always deliver on that.

And Pugly, it's funny that you'd mention actuarial studies. That was what I was majoring in when I started university. I hear they make tons of money, and use math a fair bit. The thing is, at my uni anyway, you have to take quite a bit of economics and administration classes in that program. I took an economics class and struggled the whole way through, and I have a bad feeling about administration classes, as I'm usually weak in stuff that doesn't involve a lot of numbers or logic skills. Also, I've heard that there is a lot of emphasis on speed in the tests. Speed is one of my weakest points. Even in math classes, I'm usually good at it, but I'm never fast at it. I'm always the person who's still scribbling right at the end when the prof is about ready to just grab the test away from me.

>>I should probably slow down a bit in terms of school too, but I guess it's just that the longer I stay in school, the longer I have to support myself with loans or low-paying jobs, and that sucks. <<

Or you could do what I did, take as many hours a semester as they will let you, which is probably 18 for an undergrad. Forget about working full time. Work part time if you can manage and take out loans. Live with your parents and let them support you if you cannot possibly live with that many loans. The longer it takes you to finish, the higher the chance you wont finish.

BTW Mathematics is not exactly the fastest growing profession. Someone eluded to it, and yes, the US department of labor listed mathematics as one of the few fields where jobs will actually decline. There are no jobs whatsoever outside of getting a PhD and becoming a professor. Private companies don't have any need for mathematicians. But it is insanely competitive to find any prof job, especially one in something like math. The only thing you can do with a degree in math is become an acuary. If that isn't acceptable, you might want to find a new major.

Well maybe I´m not a good example, because I´m not diagnosed with Asperger, but I have a university degree in math and have pretty much problems with communication.

I don´t think I was brilliant enough to become a professor, but even if you are, you can´t bet on such a job, because very few professors are needed.

I´ve been quit a long time unemployed (a few years) at that time.

Because I had gained a degree in teaching, I tried to get a job as a teacher at high school. I never managed to get pass the interviews though. God thx for that! I don´t think I could ever have handled a class of school kids. I remember one time I was given an explanation by telephone why they didn´t take me. They said I was an "open book". At that time I didn´t really understand what was meant by that. Now I think they meant I was to honest revealing my doubts whether I could handle such a job or something like that.

So lesson one is that maybe you have to lie a little bit. This is way more difficult for an AS-type person, then for "normal" people. Even if you´re writing a lettre you don´t have to be completely honest, because that way you´ll never find a job.

Eventually I managed to get a job as software developer. This wasn´t easy eather. You have to gain a lot of information. You have to communicate with colleages to get the information, you need. You can´t find everything on hard disc or on paper and even then where do you have to search? Because I am a type of person that is very reluctant to ask other people to help me I spend way to much time by searching my self. This of course resulted in to slow a development. Also as part of my job I had to help clients by telephone. This was pretty tough, because by times I had way to much problems to solve at the same time and I had to take priorities e.g. first solve a big problem or help a client with a simple problem first. On the other hand. I am an analytical thinker, which is something you need as a software developer, so I managed to hold that same job for quite a long time. It never went a great success though.

Then there are the changes in your career. You can´t expect to hold the same job until you´re 65. I am very reluctant to changes. You´ll get in positions by which you´re forced to change your function or department or location where you work. So you have to start all over again, which gives a lot of pressure.

Hi newt and the rest of you.

I too feel that I am between a rock and hardplace. I love numbers and on my sparetime I read a book in advanced statistics. I am 26 y by the way.

I have been diagnosed with Asperger syndrome 4 years ago. I have studied 1 year biology in university and started to study to laboratory assistant. I have some difficulties with language and grammar and I dropped into a "black hole" with suicide thoughts, depression and all the rest.

I want to work with numbers. For 4 years I have been in a daily workshop for mentally and psychological disabled. I can't go back to school and I have tried to be in a placement with writing about AS and such. I can not work with things that don't give my some mental satisfaction.

I can't possibly take a loan and go back to school because I am not sure if I can work in the future to pay it back. I so do want to work. Daily workshop do not give me any mental challenge and the I can not work enough independant at the placement.

I feel I do not belong anyware

I got A-F math in college and I recently joined Mensa so I am not stupid, I have these uncontrollable moodswings and my mind wander away from the task in hand.

It will be helpful for you to find a mentor. This person will be able to talk to you about the feasibility of your career options. Also if they know you have asperger's they can help you figure out if you can negotiate the politics of whatever place you choose to work.

I have a PhD and am still faced with this problem. People are less likely to be interested in being a mentor if you have accomplishments so college is a good place to start looking. It may take a while because it does involve talking to people.

I am lucky. Underemployment for me means I make enough money to spend impulsively on my obsessions and recover from most of my disasters. However, it also means that I may never get a job where I can use my skills and talents.

I am looking for a new job because I have screwed up badly in this one. Too many interpersonal errors in a place where getting along is more important than doing a good job. My boss is trying to say that I am doing a bad job because I hurt her feelings too many times (never on purpose). I wish she would tell me what I did to make her feel bad or threatened and then we could fix it. But what I am supposed to do (I think) is pretend I am afraid of her. I would never be able to do it with a straight face. She's just a bully and I'm not afraid. She has a huge advantage in that she is able to lie and make people believe wierd things - like that she is trying to help and protect me by trying to fire me.....

I think if I had a mentor I would have avoided all of this and gotten a job in a university where I had a mentor who could help me negotiate the interpersonal stuff. Still hoping that will happen.

These are all interesting comments, thank you to everyone for their input. For now, I have decided to go with a major in mathematics and statistics. I've heard there are lots of government jobs out there for someone with a degree in statistics (statistician for one ), and I think that there will be a lot less office politics to deal with too. I worked for a government organization last summer, and the sort of BS that goes on at most places was not tolerated there at all, and they knew about my AS and were pretty cool about it. I actually might be able to get a job with them after I'm done school, but even if I don't, I think I'll still be in a good place with a stats degree.