Dealing with My Receptionist

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So my boss and I share a receptionist. I live in Hawaii and Pidgin runs rampant here. Now in my 5 years I've learned to deal with the onslaught of bad grammar although it just irks me every time still. However, my receptionist goes in and out of it. On top of this she is VERY emotionally volatile and feels she's entitled to be that way because she's a woman. She has explicitly said, "I'd rather be irrationally emotional than rigidly intelligent." Anyway, she says ignorant stuff CONSTANTLY and although I may point what she just said made absolutely ZERO sense or I call her out when she says something ignorant just because of her own laze she constantly tries to make it seem like I'm the dick. She will then proceed to start on an emotional rant or tirade. This just sends so many of my Aspie qualities into absolute overdrive its one of the few times I can barely keep control of myself. I get angry (almost rage-like sometimes at the things she says in her tirades), confused at how someone can even act like that, and mentally overwhelmed by all the idiocy in front of me. Just one tirade can drain my battery to near zero very quickly.

It takes all my might not to fight with her openly and even if I do fight she will tell me, "If I don't agree with it, I'm not going to hear it," and talk right through you. She is very literal about this. You can tell her something and then 2 sentences later she will have already forgotten what you said. If I close my door she goes on tirades about how I've given up because I've identified that she's right and I was wrong which sends me even more into a whirl. I have to deal with this everyday practically. I've talked to my boss about it but he just tells me to ignore her but I just don't think he has an appreciation of how the perfect storm idiocy that is her affects people like us and he's sure not going to fire her over it. Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

If your boss is aware of your disability, he's obligated by law to make reasonable accommodation and making you work with an uncooperative idiot like that is not reasonable, she has all the social skills of a 3 year old (which makes her unqualified for her job - if she argues with you like that, she'll behave the same way with clients, customers and guests).

Unless you feel like making a "her or me" stand, I'd start looking for another job.

I always hated being put in situations where I had to work with incompetent people that I did not have the authority to fire.

The only other thing I can think of would be if you have sympathetic clients (you didn't say what your business is) who would complain to the boss about her, so it wouldn't be coming from you. People in Executive positions are much more quickly motivated by the threat of losing money than by anything else. If she cost him (or appeared to cost him) valuable accounts, he'd can her in a heartbeat.

I agree with your boss. you know she's irrational. when she says something, nod, smile, and leave. you are giving her way too much power over you. she really doesn't deserve it. if she were yelling out the window of a mental hospital, would you take her seriously? put her in that category.

Stop calling her on stuff. You're not going to change her. It takes two to argue.

I would not call pidgin bad grammar. It is different but so is the grammar of French. It IMHO helps to realize that pidgins are not stupid but in certain things more expressive.

Rule 1 - If her "quirks" does not impair her ability to do the job, try to ignore them.

Rule 2 - If her "quirks" annoy you, make an effort to avoid her and focus only on your work.

Ignore her ad much as possible, I doubt you'd win a nada claim for an ignorant coworker which may not be ignorant just may speak a different language variant.