How to deal with flaky employers

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Hi:
I know there are people out there who have promised to hire someone and even discuss where and when that person will start. When it comes to starting this type of boss will constantly find excuses and push the starting date back.

I was just wondering if there was an appropriate way to calmly sit down with the boss and let them know that you are frustrated with their choices.

If so what can be said without costing one their position?

If you don't mind risking your possible employment, you could carefully, kindly, "admit" to the potential employer that you "have already received another offer with a different company," but that you "would really prefer working" with the employer. This would encourage the employer to find a way to choose you if he or she is already leaning toward hiring you. But, if the employer just wants you to wait until you might become "plan B," the employer might cut you loose and focus on his or her first choice, instead.

It is a gamble, but I have seen it work.

I think what you need to ask for is an official offer of employment, in writing, laying out your start date, responsibilities, pay, etc (knowing, of course that it's not a contract of employment but verification). The company you're tentatively working for may be different (and also I'm no expert on employment issues), but the one I work for does this for everyone they verbally offer a job to. What I would do is put my request in writing; reference the discussions you've had about employment and then ask politely for the written offer. Definitely don't express frustration with the way they do things, because you might look uncooperative. If they say no, then you know it's time to move on and find a company where you won't be jerked around.

I like both of those very much as they don't sound so overly dramatic. I should have tried this last year with that one salon owner who just kept on leading me around.

What about asking the employer "I just would like to know if I am hired or not? I am confused Jimmy Bean."