How Long Until Burnout Ends Your Job?

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I'm facing unemployment again. I honestly don't know how much of it is "me" as compared to my boss(es) pushing for either a reason to let me go or get me to quit, but where I was fighting to prove myself so I'd be made full-time, permanent, so I'd get benefits and have some job security, I've passed that fateful line where now I no longer care and would honestly be more relieved than upset if I was told today I no longer had a job with them.

I've probably been here a dozen times or more before. You probably know it well. You start a job with enthusiasm. You might even love it. Then, slowly, the "issues" start to pile up, and no matter how hard you try to adapt, they don't go away...wearing you down until you no longer want to show up to work...even if you need the paycheck, like your co-workers and maybe even the job, and want to keep working. You just don't have the energy to put up with the "emotional drain" that comes with your job.

For me, I'm not sure where to put the blame.

I know I need a low-stress work environment to cope. I don't mind the occasional crisis...if anything, it keeps things interesting, but having one mess after another to fix, when my job has enough pressure trying to keep on top of the NORMAL issues that I must deal with each day, gets to the point where I just shut down and can't do it anymore.

I worked for a law firm for 8 years for someone who understood me. We had some crazy days, but most days were easy to manage...even with a lot of work to do. It's not about the volume of work, it's the "pressure" to get it done (mostly an issue with deadlines). I also had considerable liberty with taking time off, so my annual "vacation" of 2 weeks (or longer) made it easy to "reset" and get some perspective on my life. The next job I had lasted a year, and I call it a year of Hell. Constant crisis after crisis and deadline after deadline with no real freedom to take time off since nobody else was going ensuring the work would be done correctly while I was away. I was physically sick with stress before 2 months had finished.

I've been in my current job since August. I've been dosing with caffeine (coffee) twice daily, and probably double-dosing at that (large tankard). As someone who suffers with migraines, this isn't good. Most every weekend since starting is a combination of napping and migraines from trying to recover lost sleep and detox from constant caffeine dosing during the week. The caffeine keeps me "alert" and "focused" so I keep it together at work and not snap, yell, or break down during the day. Without it, I doubt I would have lasted so long. Before this job, I never touched coffee.

Just before Thanksgiving, I turned down a much lower paying security guard job to stay with this company. Overall, it was the smarter economic choice, but my gut told me I'd regret it. I now see why. They want to cross-train me (partly my idea) in another department, and I'm being pushed to do the job of two people in half the time. By 5 pm, I'm so worn out I need to leave. I'm clocking in as soon as I can get in and working 1/2 my allotted lunch period (1/2 hour is all that's legally required, they allow for 1 hour). So, I'm pulling 10-hour days as compared to 8, and I feel like I'm barely keeping up. The only reason I'm not having panic attacks is because I'm so irritated/angry that it's overriding my fear.

A big part of my anxiety is the effort it takes for me to keep track of everything going on and trying not to screw anything up. Whether it's my fault or not, I'm often chastised for issues until it's realized I didn't have anything to do with why it's messed up in the first place.

Yesterday was just my last straw. Nothing spectacular happened, but a part of me just "shut down," and I realized that as much as I didn't want to be unemployed (even if I get unemployment benefits), nor do I want to do the whole job hunt thing again, I honestly do not want to work in this job anymore. I like the people (for the most part, they've been nice), and the job in-and-of-itself is not hard, but I can't handle this pressure-cooker situation I feel I am in...even if it only feels that way because of my AS and nobody else feels that way in the office.

It's not as if I have my main job and I help out in a new department as I'm available. I'm expected to do what's handed to me, and "stay late" if needed. That'd be fine, but since having surgery a year ago, I'm lucky to sleep 4-5 hours a night, and getting more rest depends on knowing I can get another 4-5 hours with no need to wake up...normally NOT the case on work nights. Typically, I'm up anytime after midnight (having gone to bed anytime from 7:30 to 8 pm). If I can go to the gym, I hit the gym and then putter about until I can get into the office. By the time 5 pm rolls around, I've been up 16 hours...the equivalent of 10pm for most other people). So, staying late isn't an option. I need to get home (about an hour), have dinner, clean the kitchen, shower, and then manage whatever I can get done before 8 pm. Staying late simply doesn't work, and I've yet to press the issue at work.

Heck, even if I didn't have a sleep issue, allowing time for the gym (on the days I go) really doesn't give much time to spare. So, I'm talking about being able to kick in a few extra hours on two out of five days.

I'm not surprised some people just quit the job. It's cheaper for them to pay overtime than have more staff, but I can only offer about 50 hours a week before I break down, and that's without unneeded emotional pressures placed upon me.

What sort of job do you have? I get the feeling it's IT-related.

It's a pity you don't have benefits. IT people, unfortunately, have a tendency to work "on salary," rather than hourly--which means they're "exempt" employees, and thus not entitled to overtime pay. It seems as if IT people are seen as "free agents," somehow. Many seem to be "independent contractors."

If I were you, I would stay at the job until you are able to find another one (with benefits).

Have you ever thought about the civil service?

Have you tried asking for less responsibility?

I'd try cutting the hours to something more reasonable, and prioritizing your work. Don't try to do everything. If possible, try to what what is easy for you but hard for other people. Similarly, avoid stuff that is hard for you but really of minimal benefit to the company.

In my case, more responsibility results in less stress.
I have enough experience to make the right decision--so why not?

Well, to address replies,....

It's doing account payable and billing work for a durable medical equipment company. I should have benefits by now, but I suspect they are playing games about when they kick in, which is why I suspect they really were never committed to making me permanent.

Ideally, I hate to leave a job, but I really don't have much time to job interview while working.

Civil service would be nice...if you can get it.

In a sense, asking for less responsibility is what I'm now doing as my "opening shot" to be able to quit and still get unemployment benefits. Where I am, you are disqualified if you quit "without cause," and that's defined as not bringing your grievance to the employer and giving them a chance to remedy the issue. If they won't or the remedy simply does not solve the problem, you may quit and still get benefits.

The problem is that everything I'm expected to do is deemed important. I'm already handling stuff on a daily basis based on how important it is, which is why some stuff is falling behind...I never get time to get to it as I should.

Forget about ever "asking for less responsibility"--that would be your death-knell as far as your job is concerned.

You could take civil service tests, put yourself on a "list." Then, in a couple of years, maybe they'll hire you off that "list." You have to get a good score on the test, though.

I've been in the civil service for 33 years. I'm not the brightest bulb in the bunch LOL.

Sounds like you're a bookkeeper. As far as I know, I don't think it would be difficult to get a job with benefits. Look into the larger companies; they're more likely to provide benefits--and good ones, too. Relying on Obamacare is not the way to go.