Completely Lost Passion For My Career

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First, a quick warning: this post will contain a bit of anti-right wing rant. If you're strongly right-leaning, take note.

During the past 3 years, I realized that I completely lost passion for my career. I no longer care about advancement even one bit. All I want is to come to work, make money, be able to have a friendly conversation or two with my colleagues, and not get too stressed out. Basically, I just want to feel human. That's it. I work in the IT field, technical support, to be exact.

It seems like only yesterday (in my early 20's) that I was still buying into the Baby Boomers' mantra that "hard work will pay off in time" that has become a bold-faced lie. I had lofty goals of getting a Ph.D., becoming a professor at a university, and even starting a small company. Over the years, they devolved into becoming a director of IT, to a manager of a small team, to getting a good raise, to what's describe in the first paragraph. In fact, I could work at Walmart or McDonald's the rest of my life if it paid well enough. (Which it doesn't, so I have to stick to office jobs.)

I think I know what killed it: the three jobs I had between 2008 and today. I was giving my 110% to the companies I worked for, still believing that hard work will pay off. In return, I was exploited like it was the Gilded Age (circa 1880's in the USA), when workers were exploited for the managers' personal gain, before unions and labor laws were created, and what the Repubican [sic] Party wants to bring back today. According to some economists, we already are in the New Gilded Age, thanks to Reagan, Bush, and their cronies in Congress, that are every manager's wet dream. But downright deadly to the average worker.

In one job, I had to work 16-hour days, until karma kicked in, and the company pretty much folded. In another job, I was put on call 24/7/365, and got calls so frequently, that I haven't slept for 3 days in a row on one occasion, and ended up hospitalized. (I later sued them and won a paltry settlement.) In my current job, my boss is micromanaging me and putting ridiculous restrictions on me, under the dumbest pretexts that I can't argue against or I will be fired or arguing. I had periods of unemployment between those three jobs, that I kind of enjoyed, because those were times in my working years when I actually felt human.

I was even berated by my current boss for "not showing enough passion in my work". (Read: not faking well enough in my case.) The things I do have passion for have nothing to do with work, and some are quite expensive: Latin dancing, flying small planes, cruising, hiking, etc. Computers (work ones, at least) evoke nothing but a mild revulsion I got desensitized to, like a garbage collector handling leaky trash bags, or a proctologist digging past fecal matter to find a polyp. Heck, I even refuse to get the same brand of laptop at home that I have at work, despite it being really good.

Is there any way to bring back the passion? I'm thinking "no", but comments or opinions are welcome.

Is there any way you could start your own company? Some non-profit companies may have a decent environment. You could search the site "glassdoor.com" for reviews of potential new jobs. I have a state job and one of the reviews said "the poor taking care of the poor" which accurately describes my job and my coworkers.

Well, on the whole "gilded age" thing, you can thank the LEFTIST ideal of a "global economy" (granted, the righties are selling us out on that as well).

If you won't work as hard as people in a 3rd World country will work for the same pay, they won't keep you. Welcome to the new "normal."

If you do enjoy the work itself, you just need to find an employer that will work you to the limits that you are comfortable with.

A common letdown in the working world is that so much of what we pursue is just a brass ring just outside of our grasp, and the failure of most to obtain it is dismissed as our failure to try hard enough as compared to the limited number of brass rings available to be taken. How many of those who get "success" are ultimately miserable because of what they had to sacrifice to obtain their desired goal?

I completely understand the feeling.

After several years of working jobs where I actually had to deal with people constantly and becoming just mentally blown, I ran away in 2007 and became a truck driver. Just the open road and I and the only contact with people was by computer or briefly when I would pick up and deliver. The rest of the time, it was blissful solitude filled with music, audio books, various documentaries and online learning opportunities.
Unfortunately, the incessantly increasing regulations have become too much for me to deal with. Each new one cuts further and further into my ability to make a living.
So, having had this seven year break, I'm going to try working with people again in the IT field. I'll have to wade through the nightmare of manning a call center for a while until I work my way up and out of there but, if I can stick it out, it has potential. As a bonus, my brother is starting his own IT company so we are talking about joining forces later on down the road and creating our own little computer empire.

It's true that the left-wingers pushed the "global economy" agenda, but it's the right-wingers and their 1%-er lap dogs that are benefiting from it the most. As a result, you have CEO's swimming in profits that make Scrooge McDuck look dirt-poor in comparison, while honest workers are losing jobs and homes. For the sake of America's freedom and liberty, of course.

Politics aside, not only did I lose the passion for my career, I also lost the passion for self-improvement. In college, I took the most challenging courses I could find. At all my jobs until year 2013, I worked long hours, sacrificing most of personal time, weekends, and vacations, all for the hazy, mythical promise of my hard work paying off. I invested hundreds of dollars into CompTIA certificates and the related training materials, again, for the hazy, mythical promise of my hard work paying off. What did get me? Destroyed health, broken personality, and bosses who landed me in a hospital with their overwork and verbal abuse. Also the huge medical bills from that hospital, but those were paid off with my lawsuit settlement.

By contrast, when I started slacking off and working only the bare minimum not to get fired, I felt more relaxed, went on two really awesome cruises, and actually had the energy for meeting women for companionship and sex.

Now, I will not spend a cent on anything education- or training-related. Because the people who will benefit from it will not be me, but sociopathic bosses who don't see me as anything more valuable than the laptop on their desk or the printer outside their office. Can you blame for for feeling this way, and starting this thread in the first place?

I think work burnout is normal for any job. That only applies to part of your situation, though. Maybe it's your industry and you just need a change.

But I do believe the deeper issue is one that may lead you to a total change in perspective on your life. I mean, it sounds like it is already. The question is where do you take this questioning. You could get invested in a different field with the same energy and goals. That's one way. But you could do as justkillingtime implies and take a humanitarian job focused on helping others. Many people find this fulfilling.

I think humans are tribal and hard-wired to seek status within the tribe. Our "tribe" is global -- so nothing is ever enough -- and also very small, on the office level. So you get big ambitions around you at the same time as you see petty squabbling for tiny prizes. And those of us not interested in crushing other people feel, well, crushed.

I think it's better to just give up. Just do a job, any job, and find your passion in your hobbies. That's where I am now, anyway, but I could change my mind. I'm still thinking through these issues, too.

Is there anything you're passionate about that you could earn a similar or better income from? If so, do that thing. If nothing comes to mind, continue doing as you are with the thought in the back of your mind that it's merely a means to an end - in the short run a means to an income to support yourself, and in the long run, a means to the end of finding what it is that makes you come alive so that you can go do it!

I never felt that ambitious, having a dream job or desire to climb a ladder, so, I can't say what losing that feeling is like.
But! I have definitely felt burnout. I used my unappreciated knowledge and experience, first on my blog, then later on freelancing gigs. That brought passion to me for my work. Most of the benefit was my own personal satisfaction and respect in the industry. Sure, it also benefitted my employer, but, ~shrugs~.

I did switch industries, kinda. Less focused on construction and engineering and more focused on programming, data analysis and post-occupancy workflows. Very different from what I used to do and it's brought me new hope in my work life.