How to overcome prejudices when I wanna do a coming out?

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Hi,

I am Young 40 yo and think about to tell my employer about my special Needs, about my health and my autism spectrum condition.

She thinks that I have affective psychosis. That is so f*** wrong that it hurts me! I got the status being severely disabled, only because I had NHL Cancer in 2013 and the chances are given that I can get a rezidiv Cancer. So that gave me this disabled status of 80%. It started with a 100% for the first year.
Because I have had no disabilities at work from my Cancer, I had no need and no cause to tell my employer about it. By law in Germany, I can keep it secret as long as I am not questioned about it and it has nothing to do with my Job.

Now, I have got a double Disc Prolapse in my lumbar back area, started in mid 2014. It never was so severe that I need a surgery - the treatment was and is conventional. But I got chronical pain stress issue from the Prolapse. That got me a chronical stress overload and a type of Depression. I was grounded off from work for 4 weeks in April 2015. Since then, my employer thinks I may have a great severe mental issue.
Now I went to a rehability clinic for 4 weeks for pure issues of orthopedic Problems in November/December 2015. Because of ongoing persistent chronical pain issue, I went to my doc and got grounded since 12/24./15 'till still today!

I had a Meeting with my employer at 03/01/16 about Clearing some missunderstandings and my goal to get back into my Job. It was more of a Court Meeting where I learned that my employer thinks that I may have affective psychosis and could likely be a hight risk to the Company and our customers! So she told me to come back not sooner as I am healed and healthy and I shall get a psychogram from my psychiatrist that I am no mental risk to the Company and customers! The legal status of being able to work, this workability certificate from my doc is normaly totaly good and enuf to attent to work again. BUT coming back without a certification of being no Psycho risk and having still disabilities with my lumbar, so not able to lift mid weights and not fit for doing all Tasks, just doing Office desk work, will make my employer to put me off the Company site for sure!

So, I may stick to my right for privacy and not telling about my mental status and why I have the severe disability status I informed my employer about with showing the "Severely Handicapped ID Card", but that will likely lead to a law suit and Meeting at a court - or I just can offer my employer a 4 eyes Meeting and just Show her my diagnosis, without allowing her to make any copies. But still that could cause her to block me out, even after my attemt to gain back her trust. The Thing is that she cannot fire me. if she wants that, she has to ask the State authority Office for Integration for permission. Only by their OK she can fire me. Without, she still got me and has to find a way to give work to me. And yes, I know there is need for me, my team needs me.

My Employer is forced to Keep me. As soon as she learnes that, I may have the chance to do a coming out about my autism. BUT how to overcome her prejudices and that of my colleagues????

Which way to go, going the escalating path or try to have a 4 eyes talk with showing her just for reading my diagnosises?

You have to prove to them that you don't have affective psychosis.

Pursue an autism diagnosis if you haven't already.

why should I have to proof the absents of the affective psychosis it the first place? She has no proof and no qualification to be able to put that sticker at me, calling me a high risk for the Company and customers. Why do I have to proof her else by showing her my autism diagnosis I have now at Hand? She neither got any qualification of understanding this diagnosis, so how can that help to overcome her prejudice about such "mental illness and disorders" She knows only that this is a Major handycap, a Major mental disability, like rainman or alike. She would get me off the telephone Support Service Tasks at the second she reads my diagnosis, I could be a Walking risk by talking on the phone with customers and Client users. I work as a IT Systemadministrator, working all Levels from telephone help over Client on site Support to Server and Network Administration and maintenance Service.

Sounds like you need to find a better employer. It's unlikely you will effect change there and it's going to burn you out trying.

This is very complicated, and you need help and advice from your trade union or your local autistic society.

A lawyer might be the better option.

Yes. I agree.

Yeah, what union? I am not a member of any union and even when I would be, it would not be active and effective for my company.

There is not local autism society working for me.

I got a lawer in the back who would get active for me as soon as my company chief is doing illegal actions against me. But as long as I am grounded by my doc, it doesn't matter. As soon as my doc doesnt write me off any longer, I have to go to work next day. And I am sure, my employer will not be willing to let me work. That is against the law and I would only go with a official writing that she blocks me out of the site, so I can go to my lawer and call him into action.

I think about talking to my chief face to face and let her only see the diagnosis about the cancer I had, but not for copy it or let anyone else know about it. It still is my privacy area and my choosing who knows about it.
BUT she gave me a workorder about checking cables and electric devices, I am not legal qualified to check for electric safety. I am blocking, I am refusing that work order, because it is illegal and told her by e-mail and letter exactly about it. Still she stays strong for her order. And if she keeps strong at that, it will become a court issue and I am not willing to work for her as long as that issue is not solved and she does not draw back from it. How could I trust her when she wants her employees to do illegal work?

May it be that this is typical autistic, but well, I don't care if others would do these illegal work tasks, I am not those others!

If you live in Hamburg, there has to be some sort of local group for people with Aspergers or autism. Google it.

When I talk about trade union, I mean Gewerkschaft. If you don't have one, find one and join it. You need it.

There has to be someone out there who can help you. At least give you some advice on what to do. I don't know what else to say.