Networking Tips

Post Reply New Topic

I really regret that I am terrible at networking/forming professional relationships with people, and I want to improve over the next five years. My first step toward this goal was to search the "Work and Finding a A Job" Forum for the word 'networking', and nothing was found.

Does anyone have any tips? If everyone numbers their tip (1 through x) I can make a nice document out of it later, for easy reference by all WP members, without scrolling through a lot of separate posts. (I'll cite people's username).


I'll post the first (very humble) tip:

1) Address people by name when you shake hands or greet one another. It causes a spike in dopamine which facilitates learning, and they're more likely to remember you.

[If a thread like this already exists, feel free to point me in the direction!]

Don't do that #1 thing.

I used to be a hiring manager. Not recently, but a few years ago. Whenever it came time to hire someone I had to look at maybe 100-150 resumes, interview maybe 10 people over the phone and then interview 3-6 in person before choosing someone. This was before I studied autism. I'm overly neurotypical, so I notice more than most people when it comes to body language, facial expressions, etc. I now study adult workers on the autism spectrum and something called symbolic interactionism, which are the tiny nuances of social interaction and their meanings.

Okay, so the reason why you shouldn't do the #1 is because it's something a used car salesman would do, or a guy at a bar trying to get your number. It would not go over as appropriate in a professional setting. Unless you were trying to get a job in sales.

Professional networking refers to something I am used to calling Cold Contacts and Warm Contacts.

Cold Contacts
These are people that you don't know. You could call or email someone, or happen to introduce yourself in person. You could say, "Hi, my name is Fluter. I'm trying to get my resume out there in the field of [whatever you do]. I was reading [online, facebook, newspaper, whatever] and your name kept coming up as the person to talk to. Do you think you could get the hiring manager to take a look at this?" Then you attach your resume or hand it to them.

Warm Contacts
These are people you have met before. You contact them again and ask if they have any information on how you can get a job in whatever organization they have pull with. "Hey, [contact], it's me, Fluter. Good to see you! [say something social and polite here] Do you know if [your organization] is hiring or will be hiring soon?"

Either way could get you a job before it hits a place like Monster.com or Indeed.com. An organization will only advertise in a place like that as a last resort. Often, they already have an "internal candidate" lined up before they advertise the job. The internal candidate will get the job no matter what. The advertisement is a formality. The only way to get the job is to contact the people via the warm or cold contact techniques, so before the company appears to be hiring.

I hope this helps. I'm sorry it's not in numbered format like you're wanting but I think this information would actually help you more than a numbered list.

I've gone to a number of networking seminars, and they say it's a good idea to address someone by name when shaking hands and meeting them. It validates them and helps you remember their name. It's not sleazy or salesy, in and of itself. Saying someone's name gets to be a little too much though if you keep doing it a whole lot throughout the conversation.

I've been told to hold off on directly asking whether or not an organization is hiring. In most contexts, networking is way more casual than this, so I've contacted people later. In general, it's a good idea to frame things so that the person doesn't feel put on the spot and doesn't have to say no in a direct way. One way of doing this is, "I'm looking for a job in XYZ. Do you have any advice for me?" Otherwise, it's good to ask questions about the field when talking to someone who works in a job you want.

Since a lot of networking is Smalltalk, I play a little game: see how quickly I can find genuine common ground with someone without interrupting them when they start talking about themselves.

Here are some practices I see regularly:
1. Asking about where you're from, making positive small talk about the town, what school the person went to, ETC. Nothing too factual, nothing that sounds like it came out of a textbook.

2. Answering questions succinctly, most of the time.

3. People walking away from someone who talks a lot or dominates the conversation. They wait for a pause and say, "Nice meeting you."

4. Collecting business cards to follow up and keep in touch after the meeting.

Ways to follow up after:
1. Email or LinkedIn, mentioning something positive, i.e. "We had a nice conversation about your work as an ABC."

2. Sharing an article or other info, saying, "In case you didn't already see this, here's..."

3. Inviting them to a networking event. If there's a fee, make sure you don't say "Want to come as my guest?" unless you're willing to pay the fee or unless you state the fee.

4. If it's a regular event, you could ask, "It's been a while since we chatted. Will I see you at the next meeting?"

5. Reminding them what you're looking for, or the types of people you want to meet. "Are there any other meetings you think I should attend, or people I should meet?"