Just need to vent

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About 4 months ago, I got a job as a front service clerk (also known as a bagger even though we have to do more stuff than just bagging) at Publix (a grocery store that is all about providing "premiere customer service" for those of you who don't live in the south and aren't familiar with it). You hear a lot about what a great company it is to work for because they pay pretty well, have benefits, and there are opportunities to move up in the company. I applied there because I wanted to work somewhere where I'd get paid a bit more, and where I'd be valued and my hard work would be more acknowledged (I was working at a restaurant called Newk's before...It wasn't the worst job, and I generally enjoyed the work, but was still making barely above minimum wage after 3 years there and felt a bit underappreciated). I'm also going to school to be a teacher, but have had a lot of second thoughts about whether that's really a good career for me (and also can't think of another major that interests me), so I wanted to get a job with better pay and opportunities so that I'd have something better to fall back on when I graduate and possibly can't get a teaching job or just don't want to do it.

I really enjoyed the job at first. But then my manager started getting onto me about doing "2 and 2". They are SO adamant about this customer service thing that they want us to practically be pushy with customers about taking their groceries out to their car for them. They even have these specific rules about how to get control of the customer's cart and make two attempts to take their groceries out. Of course, we're standing at the end of the register so they want us to pull the cart all the way around towards us and out of the customer's reach while we're bagging their groceries. Then they want us to have both hands on the cart and just start walking towards the door once the customer is finished. If they say no, we're supposed to try one more time (just ask "are you sure?" or say, "I don't mind, I've got it") and then we can finally just let them go if they still decline. Well, as I'm bagging, I often have to actually ask them if I can have their cart, because they often have their hands on the cart, or they have their purse or their baby/small child sitting in it and of course I don't want to just snatch their purse/child away from them without asking first. Usually, everything's fine and they let me take the cart, but some customers just don't let me. They either know that I'm going to try to take their groceries out later and they don't want me to, so they just insist, "no, I'm fine" before I can even take the cart from them. Or again, sometimes they have their child in the cart and are either uncomfortable with me taking the cart from them, or they just want to keep their child close to them so that they can keep an eye on him/her. Also, if I get behind on bagging for any reason (for example, I just clocked in or I just came back from outside and I jump in on a register that hasn't had a bagger...obviously it's gotten backed up, or sometimes it's just a ton of groceries and I have to kind of rearrange bags in the cart which makes it take longer), then I'll often still not be finished when the customer is finished paying...so they'll often just walk over to where I put the cart and get their hands on it before I can. I can't just pull the cart all the way behind me and totally block it from the customer, because 1. I wouldn't even be able to reach into the cart to put all the bags in it and 2. If I push it too far, it will get in the way of the people at the register behind mine.

So, I guess when I first started working here, I didn't realize there were all these rules (nobody really trained me...I "shadowed" another bagger for about 10 minutes on my first day and then I was left on my own). So in October, I got a verbal warning and really tried to do better. My manager once told me that I was doing better, and when I got my 3-month evaluation, it said that I had gotten a verbal about 2 and 2 but was doing better. Since the verbal, I have literally been doing everything I can but again, I occasionally have those moments where it just can't happen. Well, suddenly, yesterday, my manager called me into her office again and showed me camera footage (there are cameras everywhere so we are always filmed) of two times that I didn't do 2 and 2 and decided to write me up. One of those times was literally the minute I had clocked in and jumped on a register where of course the bagging had gotten backed up, so it was one of those cases where I was still trying to finish up when the customer was done paying, so of course she walked over to the cart and got her hands on it...and of course I still offered to take her cart for her but she declined, and on camera, it just looked like I didn't try. I have tried so many times to explain these situations to my manager and she never has any reasonable solution. When I told her about customers just getting to the cart first, she said I just need to make sure I'm pulling it all the way around...which I am! No matter how far I pull it, the customer is going to walk over and get it if they really want to. And again, obviously I'm not going to pull it so far that I literally can't even reach into the cart (because I would have to just toss the groceries in...sounds like a great way to break their eggs and smash their bread). I also told her about people who just won't let me have the cart to begin with and all she said was to just really keep pushing it. Which I'm not comfortable doing... I'm supposed to be bagging during that time too and certainly don't have time to stand there and argue with a customer to try to convince them to give me their cart!

So, she wrote me up, and then had to have me and the assistant store manager sign the sheet. Apparently a district manager visited that day and "failed" the customer service department, at least partly because some baggers weren't doing "2 and 2" correctly so obviously this was a big reason that they suddenly decided to get onto me today and hadn't any other time since he verbal. So I do kind of wonder if the write up was mostly for show. If the district manager chewed her out, she might have just had to tell him she'd write people up to show that she was doing something about it. But I'm still so stressed out (who ever thought that bagging groceries would be a stressful job?) On the slip, it says that if I "fail to improve", the next step will be a one week suspension. I just can't help being hurt and angry that this happened. I have never called out, and I have helped them out and come in on my off days when someone else called out several times. The only time I've been late was when I had a family emergency. Even the assistant store manager told me that I was one of their best employees and said that he loves closing with me because he never has to worry about what the bathrooms or floors look like because he knows I'll always clean thoroughly. And he said when I do get the "2 and 2" right, I do a great job, but that I just need to learn how to deal with these more "difficult" customers. Well, based on this, I guess being a hard working employee isn't what really counts. It's about how pushy you can be and also pretty much doing the impossible (somehow magically keeping any customer from possibly touching their cart at all before I can finish bagging). I just can't get suspended - I would feel so ashamed and humiliated. Even at Newk's, where they often failed to acknowledge my hard work, at least they didn't get onto me for little things or write me up.

And of course, being on the spectrum (pretty sure I am even though I haven't sought a diagnosis) doesn't help in this situation at all. I literally CANNOT be super pushy with people. If I wanted to be pushy, I would have gotten a job as a realtor or a car salesman! I just freeze up when I try to take someone's cart and they tell me no...I literally have no idea what to say to try to get them to let me have it. Sometimes they're also on their phones or conversing with the cashier, and I have trouble jumping in and trying to ask them to give me their cart in those cases too. Heck, I think even many NTs would be uncomfortable in this situation, so it's just ten times worse for socially awkward people and people on the spectrum. I heard that the bakery at my store has openings right now, so I'm seriously considering putting in an application to switch departments. Maybe I just don't belong in customer service if these are the standards they expect me to meet. I just feel like I need to get out before something bad happens (they decide to suspend me). I'd like to just move to the bakery, or maybe even just be a cashier instead...I'd still have to try to maintain conversations with customers which can be difficult, but at least there's no "2 and 2" crap to worry about so maybe my manager wouldn't be on my butt so much. I don't want to have to quit and either go back to Newk's or look for a totally new job. But now I'm not even so sure I have any interest in trying to move up in the company, if managers are put under that much pressure for everything to be perfect, to the point where they have to write people up for stupid things in order to cover their own butts. So now, what the heck am I going to do with my life if I can't be a teacher?

Wow, I never had that kind of pressure when I was a bagger. I admire you for working so hard to do it the way they want you to.
I was the only bagger that did not try to get out of work all the time.
Are there any other grocery stores in your town that you could work at? In our town we used to have a super service type store, but it was put out of business by Walmart.
My first thought would be go somewhere else, if not I think bakery or cashier would be good. you might be better of with the social part of cashiering than you think. I was OK and I am terribly introverted.

Yeah. My mom worked as a cashier for Publix about 35 years ago and when I told her what happened, she thought it was totally absurd and said that there wasn't even such a thing as "2 and 2" when she worked there and that baggers were not told to basically force themselves on customers. I guess they've gone insane over the last few years.

Well, I did put an application for the bakery today, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I also said something about possibly wanting to cashier, but they seemed to interpret it as that I wanted to be "cross trained" which would mean I would still technically be a bagger, but I'd also be trained on the register so that I could do it if we were ever short-handed on cashiers. And my manager acted all happy that I was showing interest in being cross trained so then I didn't want to come out and say, "oh, but I just want to be a cashier, I do NOT want to bag at all anymore!" I didn't want her to think that I was just throwing a tantrum after what happened. I certainly am still angry over it, but I definitely don't want to quit bagging out of spite. It truly is stressing me out now because of the threat of suspension. I almost had a panic attack today when a customer came over and got their hands on the cart before I was finished bagging because I just imagined my manager scrutinizing my every move on the camera and then blaming me for not offering carryout to that customer and suspending me. I was stressed out my whole shift, and I tried to just start bagging faster so that it wouldn't happen, but I was sacrificing some other things - I definitely was not bagging stuff as carefully and I was not able to focus at all on being friendly with and talking to the customer because I was just in a frenzy to get everything bagged and keep the cart away from them! It's so ridiculous.

I can relate to a lot of this. While attending college part-time, I worked full-time at Wal-Mart for four and a half years. I started out as a cashier, and it can indeed be very stressful! Also, the "2 and 2" rule seems completely ridiculous, imo.

Your write up very well could have been because your manager wanted to get the district manager off of her back by proving that she'd written up employees for breaking this rule. I experienced something similar to this with an incompetent manager.

Often times lower management will try to prove to their bosses that they are fixing problems, even when they aren't. One of the quickest ways for a bad manager to do that is to discipline employees. This gets their boss off of their back short-term. But they're hurting themselves more long-term by taking the easy way out. They've done nothing to solve the problem, and have alienated good employees in the process.

Because you signed the paper when she wrote you up, there probably isn't a way for you to get this off of your work record. For next time, if you feel that you are being unfairly written up because you are An easy target for your manager, don't sign it immediately. If you are willing to stand up for yourself, many bad managers will back off. And as an extra bonus, that manager may never try this again with you. They'll know they may not get away with it.

I understand your anger completely. A situation like this happened to me with a manager that was well-known for being bad at her job. I was a hard, thorough worker, but I was also quiet and rarely complained. For some managers, this is enough to start picking on you.

I never received my written reprimand from her, because I immediately disagreed and explained why I didn't deserve it. When I disagreed with my manager, I tried to be polite and calm, but remained firm. I explained myself and the circumstances of the incident. It also may help to ask the manager how they would have handled your situation if it had happened to them. Your manager may have a difficult time explaining what you could have done differently if they indeed were writing you up as an excuse.

Because you already received your written warning, start focusing on damage control.
Show them that you care about your performance and you want to improve. Just from reading your post, I can see that you have this trait. Most managers will appreciate this and be happy to help you succeed.

You mentioned that an assistant manager said you were one of their best employees. Talk to this guy ASAP and tell him about the problems you're having! Let him know that you are sometimes struggling with customer service situations. Tell him that you were written up for the 2 and 2 rule, and that you would like some help to follow the rule correctly.

It would also be a good idea to mention that you're interested in transferring over to the bakery. There's nothing wrong with admitting that you aren't an outgoing person, and you feel that customer service may not be a very good fit for you.

At Wal-Mart, I started out as a cashier. I wasn't terrible, but I had plenty of awkward and downright painful moments. Once a customer berated me because he made a joke, and I didn't smile or laugh because I didn't know he was joking! He chewed me out and said horrible things to me as I rang up his cart full of items. He called me rude, claimed I had no life, and that I was sour and unhappy because I couldn't get a "real" job. I was crying and apologizing to him as he was saying those things to me. I transferred to an overnight stocker position as soon as I could and I loved it!

Working in retail at customer service can be difficult even for people who are very outgoing and great with people. Sometimes customers just want someone to be mad at, and you're the most convenient person to abuse. I was always amazed at the women who worked the service desk during my Wal-Mart days. I could have never survived!

Good luck, girl. And have a chat with your nice assistant manager.

I recently started doing personal shopping for other people's groceries, so I'm in Publix a lot. I live in Charlotte, NC, but I'm from NY.

Until very recently, I didn't know it was a big deal with Publix to have the baggers help customers to their cars. When I shop for my personal groceries, I buy so few items that I have always kindly refused because I felt that someone else could use the offered help. I'm used to bagging my own groceries and unloading them myself anyway, being from NY.

With the personal shops that I do, I always accept the help of the baggers because I'm getting a lot more stuff on behalf of my customers and I genuinely need assistance.

I'm sorry to hear that the baggers get in trouble when a customer refuses assistance. Personally, I will pass this information on to my relatives and fellow personal shoppers, in hopes of decreasing situations where you can get written up.

You won't get a bagger in trouble simply by refusing assistance. The problem is if you refuse early on and don't even let him/her pull your cart around towards them while they bag. Or, if when you finish paying, you go over and grab the cart before they can get their hands on it. If a manager sees it (well, at least a manager that is anything like mine) then they will blame the bagger because they didn't see them with "2" hands on the cart and making "2" attemps to take the groceries out. So if you really don't want assistance but don't want to get the bagger in trouble, just let them take your cart from you while they bag and make sure to let THEM grab the cart initially. Again, we're trained to grab the cart, offer to take it out, and start walking towards the door, but you can say no at that point (if the bagger is following the "proper" procedure, they'll try again by saying something like "are you sure?" but if you say no again, they'll let you go). The bagger will be in the clear at that point because they made a "true" attempt to take your groceries out.