Swearing customer accused me of having no manners

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At one of the charity shops where I worked, I served a lady (I use that term loosely) who was cross with me because of the way I gave her her change. She said, "You ain't got no ******* manners, throwing the money like that." I wasn't being rude, because I have always done that in the past and no-one complained about it in the past. And with language like that, SHE'S the one with no manners!

I wasn't in the best of moods when I came into work that day, but I considered myself in a decent enough state to perform my duties. This just made it worse. I didn't say anything to the woman, I just cried and struggled with the rest of the workload. Because of the way I handled it (this was the first time I ever had a really nasty customer) I was demoted and made to work in the backroom.

How can I deal with this better should this happen again in future? Any good advice please.

A smile and some small talk usually prevents such situations, but that can be a difficult skill for those on the spectrum to master. A lot of autistics would actually prefer to work in the back room, away from customers, for precisely that reason.

You need to make some kind of script up in your head, like every time a customer comes in do the same thing every time. So for example, you'd have to smile and say "here's your change, have a nice day" in a kind of higher pitch positive tone of voice. Not like too much though.

How about you google some videos of people serving other people in shops and just mimic what they do, something simple but polite/positive. It may help.

Also, don't let that interaction get to you, the general public are complete idiots. They'll get butthurt about the most ridiculous things, especially old people, cause they just love complaining and having drama cause they've nothing else to do so it keeps them entertained. Well done on getting out there and doing this stuff in the first place though and don't worry about the demotion, just better your skills and try again, practice makes perfect.

"You ain't got no f*cking manners!"

"No, ma'am, I have to make do with regular ones."

I should point out that the manager was absent on this occasion, and I had to answer to the deputy manager, whom I didn't know very well. So this incident kind of threw me in at the deep end.

Anyway, a career adviser once told me that most retail outlets don't employ people to only work in the backroom, which I guess is why my applications for proper paid shop work have failed. But I enjoyed working on the till until that incident. I believed that working directly with customers would help me overcome my obstacles and grow in confidence

I suppose it is like playing contact sports. No matter how good you are you can expect to get beat up pretty badly every now and then. Maybe you can get back in there and do better the next time?

The deputy manager may of put you in back because he thought you were pretty upset & would like/need a break from dealing with customers to calm down. Talk to the regular manager about it when he's there if your still demoted or would like mangment to handle things differently incase there is a next time. The best thing to do in that situation is try not to show that your upset cuz the customer is clearly the one with the problem & taking it out on you.