First Day at Work went mostly well
So things went relatively well for my first day, except for the fact that I forgot to bring hand sanitizer and a mask, so I had to use a month old mask that I forgot in the car (luckily N95, so it should be protective), but it was probably dirty, still I only had to wear it for an hour before I was able to buy a new mask (not N95) at New York CIty.
Then I went in to my job for training, which went reasonably well. I didn't mess up socially nor professionally.
At least until the very end of the shift, everyone was gone and only me and another co-worker were there. I was doing the training program about Transgender rights and I made a politically insensitive comment. Although my coworker did not really seem offended, it still wasn't a smart thing to say.
So that people don't think I'm being a monster what I actually said was "Transgender people get too much special treatment." Although to some people I imagine that makes me a monster.
It was a mistake, but I hope that wasn't a very big mistake. What are your experiences with making mistakes on the job?
Long section ahead about why I said such a politically insensitive thing.
My reasoning behind saying that was that Transgender people get a lot of protection so that they don't feel alienated from the NORMAL community. Yet for my Autism, I wasn't told throughout my childhood to value my uniqueness, to value my autistic traits. I remember being taught by several life coaches and in several sessions how to adjust to normal people. I should make eye contact, I should do this, I should do that, to fit in. I struggle to do such things even now, but people around me still expect me to make efforts to fit into a society where I don't feel comfortable. Yet Transgender people get legal protections to act as they are and society tries to conform to them.
I am not updated on Autism Advocacy, but does anyone know if the same holds true for Autistic people. Do we have the same protections as Transgender people, at least in the US? If so, I would like to sincerely apologize for making such an insensitive statement as it would not be fair to say such a thing if protections exist for us and I was simply unaware.
Note: Please no personal attack or holier than thou attitudes. I have an unpopular point of view, true, but it is subject to change and I would actually like to have my mind changed with good clear reasoning. I actually support people being transgender, I'm just unsure about why they have so many legal protections. If someone can calmly explain why to me and not call me a bigot or some other derogatory name. I'm sure I can come around to a better point of view.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
I suppose I should clarify my post a bit, since upon rereading it, it does seem like a directionless rant.
1. I want to ask aspies who have worked in an office environment about Socializing in an office context. What is acceptable, what is not acceptable, how do you get through it.
1. A. The neurotypical answer I received was to never talk about politics and social issues. When I asked "Why does everyone bring those up then though." I was told that was "Because most people are stupid." I was told that I should only say anything if it is my supervisor or manager who is saying something political by acting like I agree with them, yet not commiting to anything, since they maybe responsible for my promotion and I should be on their good side. (Something about that just rubs me the wrong way.)
2. I'd also like clarification on the issue of transgender rights. It's arguably an issue I am not knowledgeable in. I mostly support transgender rights, their freedom to be transgender, their freedom to serve in the military, and basic protections to protect them against discrimination I support. But I don't understand the bathroom issue and why it has become such a big deal. They want the freedom to go into the bathroom that they feel comfortable in. But how come no else gets that freedom?
Edit: I've done a little more reading on the issue and the Conservative point of view seems odd to me, they seem to assert that allowing transgender people to use bathrooms would somehow lead to an increase in crime because people would disguise themselves as transgender to infiltrate bathrooms. There doesn't seem to be much evidence for that or reasoning behind it. My reason for being uncomfortable with the issue is much more simple: If transgender people feel uncomfortable sharing the restroom with people of a certain gender, then is it not strange that cis-gendered people are expected to feel comfortable sharing the restroom with a transgender person? Rather than allow transgender people to use the bathroom they feel comfortable in, I'd rather they end gender-segregated restrooms and make all restrooms unisex.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
Last edited by Confused_Sloth on 16 Jul 2020, 8:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
I get through most difficult situations by saying as little as possible. I cannot agree with someone who expresses unkind views. Instead, I try to remove myself from the immediate area if possible, listen without agreeing, gently suggest alternative ways of thinking if the person and situation seem receptive.
The way to promote autistic rights and awareness is not by disparaging groups that also deserve respect.
Bathrooms are separated in most instances based solely on gender. Did you feel anyone should be able to chose to use the other gendered space?
I'm not disparaging them I'm simply stating I'm uncomfortable with the fact that they have special permission to use the bathroom they feel comfortable in, despite the fact that may make other people feel uncomfortable.
Saying I am uncomfortable sharing the bathroom with a transgender person is not disparaging them. If it is, then should I be insulted that a transgender person does not want to share the bathroom with me? I'd rather they just make all bathrooms unisex, then it wouldn't be an issue. Just make every single bathroom appliance have a stall for privacy.
Edit: If you feel my views are unkind please explain your position. I have already provided my position and signalled that I am open to changing my position. But you have not made any attempt to change my mind, you have simply called me unkind and disrespectful. And yes I do feel that anyone should be able to use the other gendered space.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
@ beady, Okay I thought you were calling my position as unkind, thank you for clarifying and sorry for assuming. I also want to clarify my position a little bit.
I am okay with "Anyone should be able to use any bathroom that they feel comfortable using."
But I am against allowing people to be the exception to the rule.
If we need to make exceptions to the rule for gendered bathrooms. Doesn't that mean gendered bathrooms is a bad rule in the first place? That's what I think that bathrooms shouldn't be separated by gender if we have to make exceptions.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
I am kind of sad that I could not meet a transgender person on this forum. I suppose I will look into a forum more focused on transgender issues while researching more about this issue. If I change my position on this issue I'll be sure to make a post about the research I've done and why the transgender bathroom issue is so important as I'd like to be a more inclusive person so I will make an effort to change my position.
_________________
AQ:41
EQ:86
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
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