Do you worry about what your workmates think about you?

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In most contexts, I'm used to not worrying about what others think about me.

Four months ago I changed jobs to another company. Sometimes I eat with my team in our room during lunchtime. That's when they chit-chat; sometimes I enjoy listening to them depending on their discussion.
I have realized that my boss likes to complain about others or to talk behind someone’s back. I'm aware that this is more common than I thought, but I have heard really bad things —from my point of view— that it makes me feel uncomfortable.

I'm not sure if it's only me who feels uncomfortable and my workmates find it fine to have this kind of discussion. My boss tends to criticize the social aspects of other people, aspects that I don't pay attention to and I don't take into account when I interact with the person they are talking about.

My boss has pointed out some of my Aspie traits in front of my workmates in a way I consider polite (I haven't disclosed my autism diagnosis in my job). Nevertheless, every time I listen to her talking behind someone’s back, I feel worried about what she says about me when I'm not present.

I generally don't care much about what they think, but I want them to be friendly towards me, and most of them are.

Yesterday I had an appraisal talk with my boss. One of the subjects is an event, some weeks ago, and I wanted to help the organizers with several things. I wanted to help with Augmented Reality applications (for future students (now children in elementary schools)) and walking with a platter with snacks for the visitors on that event.

A few days later the organizers went to me, and think I could not do that. I can better go to the school's parking lot and help the visitors to find a place on the lot where they can park their vehicles.

Yesterday I had a talk with my boss, as I said. He said, colleagues think I could not do certain things. He disagrees with them. Generally I am very glad with my new boss, and I do hope, he won't ever leave.

Generally I don't care much what other co-workers think about me, but if they think I can't do certain things, this will be a problem. It is almost impossible to advance, to grow in my abilities. They have to trust and teach me. If they have criticcism, they should just say it. The same as my boss himself does.

My boss doesn't underestimate me, but is also realistic (he recognizes that I had bosses that didn't see my skills and my ambitions). He describes me as a good co-worker, one can work together with me, and there is almost no errors I make.

He wants to do the following:
- calendar management with Outlook;
- talking with a manager of event projects.
I also will do tasks that a co-worker does now. That co-worker will retire in school year 2025/2026. Later on I can discuss a few things with her.