Does your calendar age determine how employers treat you?
I sometimes think it's subtle age discrimination. I've literally done well in interviews and in jobs, but when employers discover that I am about 10 years older (30s not 20s) than they thought, they start treating me differently, and it's not for the better. It's not with more respect. Sometimes their patience goes down, or sometimes they act like I'm spoiled goods.
One GM was one day enthusiastic around me. That day I had to have my license copied and tax work done. I saw the guy look at my license, then raise his eyebrows in displeased surprise, then go off to copy my paperwork. Ever after that moment, both he and his assistant began treating me differently.
It's been the same at jobs, school admissions and so on. The age thing has also affected females I was meeting. Granted these females were in their early 20s and thought I was only a couple of years older, instead of over a decade.
Anyone else experience the same? Has anyone ever admitted to changing their perception because of knowledge of your age?
sartresue
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The reason of age topic
This is an interesting topic, Ohanrahan.
At first I was going to say no, things are better. In some jobs age can work for or against a person. If I work with senior citizens I find the seniors have more of a rapport with me when they see my greying hair. When I was much younger I was treated like an errant grandchild!
However some employers treat me as if I am an 'old fool', and they prefer young people. (This may be what you are alluding to in your post.) They never miss an opportunity to remind me. Use of a computer is not an issue because I often know more about PCs than some people my age who are not ITs. This surpises many older employers. One of the better jobs was when we were all roughly the same age, and the job had a lot of employees, so that I was not centred out. And it is always better if your co-workers trust you to do a good job.
Now I find in job interviews that mostly my age works against me in the janitorial work I am applying for because they want young, physically strong employees. I suppose I am not the tower of strength I used to be. Multitasking, co-ordination and finger dexterity have always been challenges and it does not get any better as you advance in longevity, what with arthritis and all.
Apologies, Ohanrahan, because I did not have a solution. I hope others post remediesfor what has worked for them.
_________________
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Awe-Tistic Whirlwind
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NOT a believer of Mystic Woo-Woo
At my last job, no one seemed to know how old I was. I worked at a branch library. The hiring process was done by the city (my real employer) and the central library (controlled by the city and in control of the branch libraries. So it went:
City => Central Library => District Manager => Branch Manager => me and other employees at the branch
Anyway, at first, everyone treated me like I was in high school. When I told them I was in grad school, they treated me like I was a young college student. The branch manager was probably only a few years older than me, but she treated me like I was a whole generation younger. While I was working there, they hired two high school students. One tried to ask me out, and the other one rolled his eyes and walked away when I gave him some advice on how to do the job better. Later, he asked what school I went to. I said, "I'm working on a masters degree online."
He said, "Wait, how old are you?"
I said, "I'm almost 30," and he kind of freaked out, and told me he had thought I was younger than him (he was 17). He voiced his shock so loudly that other employees overheard. Then I think the word spread that I was older than they had thought, and they started treating me more like an equal than a kid.
In a similar experience, I had been working at a restaurant for a year when I told everyone I was moving to Texas. One server said, "Oh, with your family? Did your dad get a new job there or something?"
I said, "I'm moving by myself. It's been almost ten years since I last lived with my parents," and she acted shocked.
I've been starting to understand this by taking pictures of myself. I think that in most ways, I look my real age, but I have a very innocent look in my eyes. It must be an AS thing because I am not innocent.
I think that is the essence of it all, but while I now have a somewhat mature shaped face and hairline, I didn't get that until I was 30.
When employers look at me (depends on job) they assume I am just out of college; same with women. There is greater interest and a certain amount of understanding they lend me that disappears when they discover I am in my 30s.
I think there is also a gender perspective too. As a male I find that when new employers or interested young women change the way they treat me when the age is out.
Sometimes the change is in treating me more as an equal, but that's the exception. Some of them just don't fancy me anymore.
I was in a school for an associates degree ( already had a BFA) a couple of years ago. When the "kids " heard I was 33 they freaked out.
I have no idea how I'm supposed to deal with this. I was a runt my whole life and didnt get my growth spurt untill I was in my late 20s.
It seems to get a lot of disrespect .Or rather lack of respect.
Thing is I've been told I act even younger than I look . Not in a sophmoric way but in a simple naive way.
If I was a woman I'd be happy about it I guess.
I COMPLETELY sympathise with the original post , but I have no clue what to do. It's ok for women to lie about thier age why cant we?
I have no idea how I'm supposed to deal with this. I was a runt my whole life and didnt get my growth spurt untill I was in my late 20s.
It seems to get a lot of disrespect .Or rather lack of respect.
Thing is I've been told I act even younger than I look . Not in a sophmoric way but in a simple naive way.
If I was a woman I'd be happy about it I guess.
I COMPLETELY sympathise with the original post , but I have no clue what to do. It's ok for women to lie about thier age why cant we?
I so agree. It seems that people have the preconceived ideas about how people are supposed to be at certain ages. Employers who are just going on my looks (shortened resume), seem to fancy me more.
Here's the problem with women:
Women 28 to 38 assume I am too young or view me as too immature.
Women 24-27?
Women 19-23 are fine with me and I do attract them in this range; they just withdraw when they discover I am in my 30s.
Now if Johnny Depp can be in his 40s and still have women worshippers of all ages, why are not normal men allowed to be older or older and look and act younger?
I have no idea how I'm supposed to deal with this. I was a runt my whole life and didnt get my growth spurt untill I was in my late 20s.
It seems to get a lot of disrespect .Or rather lack of respect.
Thing is I've been told I act even younger than I look . Not in a sophmoric way but in a simple naive way.
If I was a woman I'd be happy about it I guess.
I COMPLETELY sympathise with the original post , but I have no clue what to do. It's ok for women to lie about thier age why cant we?
I so agree. It seems that people have the preconceived ideas about how people are supposed to be at certain ages. Employers who are just going on my looks (shortened resume), seem to fancy me more.
Here's the problem with women:
Women 28 to 38 assume I am too young or view me as too immature.
Women 24-27?
Women 19-23 are fine with me and I do attract them in this range; they just withdraw when they discover I am in my 30s.
Now if Johnny Depp can be in his 40s and still have women worshippers of all ages, why are not normal men allowed to be older or older and look and act younger?
For the same reason James Kirk gets all the green alien bootie "CAUSE HES THE CAPTAIN!"
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