References

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Does anyone else here seem to have a great problem getting references for jobs, or anything else (such as a course) that requires them?

I certainly do. There's my last job/employer which made me redundant, but would not give me a reference until I was actually on the dole, therefore ensuring I would have a period of unemployment which could have been avoided, and which turned out to be very long.

And I start a degree course in September which required two references. One of my referees would not give a reference, despite having agreed to do so. This did not prevent me getting a place on the course, they offered me a place anyway.

Might this be a greater problem for Aspies than for other people, because of being more likely to have a lack of good connections? A lack of good connections with those in authority?

It just seems that because of the idea of needing references for anything, your fate is too much in the hands of others. Your opportunities and advancements can be blocked too much purely at the whim of others, something we especially don't need.

Oh, yes. I'm not going to be getting a glowing reference from my current employers, that's for sure! Current references for me would be thin on the ground, so I definitely empathise with this one.

Yes it was always a nightmare for me. You have to be part of the pecking order or seen to comprehend it to get a reference. It requires social skills aspies don't have.

To be fair, NTs don't always have a better time with this.

The simple fact is that "references" are people who are not your friends who will vouch about your ability.

If you have mad skillz (yo), this is an easy thing to manage. However, the AVERAGE NT doesn't have this either. So, they rely on supervisors willing to go on record for them. In this age of sue-happy people, companies are really cracking down on anyone giving any kind of reference (good or otherwise) and even personnel departments won't do anything but confirm that you worked there, dates of employment, job title and pay.

So, a prospective employer loves seeing people who can actually produce references, but most people (AS or NT) get shafted because where an employer used to be a positive reference for an average but reliable worker, now only the very exceptional tend to be able to provide such contacts in a job application.

This may be helpful:

http://www.out-law.com/page-5851

If you're using an job application, references would be former co-workers, teachers/professors, and friends of the family--but not family members themselves.

If you're using a resume, the usual method is to put "References Available on Request", since you need to limit your resume to one page.

My problem getting references was the fact that I've worked mostly for large corporations, and thanks to litigious American culture, company policy was to only confirm employment dates and job title, and nothing else. As in, anyone who actually says anything not explicitly approved by the legal department risks losing their job.

I almost didn't get this job because of it. Fortunately, they accepted a non-family personal reference in lieu of professional because of this situation.

I'm damaged goods. I only know two people in my career that will give me a positive reference. I should just give it up and live under a bridge.